Reuniting with your dads side of the fam

[lamontbdc]

Me and my pops have no relationship at all. Bout 8 years ago i actually go this was the time my daughter was just a year old so folks wanted to see her. This is when for the 1st time my father's girlfriend and other kids saw me and my sister. I mean half of them were speechless like who the fuck are these 2 and why do they look just like my father. Pops had never told them about us at all. My aunt invited us on the low thinking it would be a great idea. But then we realize that all my aunts and uncles on his side been covering for him and telling his other family that we didn't even exist. I thought it was gonna get better and go somewhere once my moms and grand moms passed away but it still didn't. It's kinda sad b/c he's the only parent i got left. I was raised by my moms parents and my grandfather is still alive but he got dementia. I got a good relationship with 2 of his brothers. They always looking out. Not really down with his sister like that but my sister keep sin contact with them. I even reach out and call him sometimes to tell him my daughter wants to go out with her grandfather and met her other cousins. But it never really goes anywhere b/c i guess he just doesn't care at this point.

 

[DatNiggaB1]

Met my dad when i was 14, saw him 8 different occasions before he died 3 years later.

My kids no none of my fathers side of the family.

We see each other in the street and act like we gonna keep in contact. Then...............

nothing.

 

[blakfyahking]

got this issue going on right now

I'm not interested in meeting my biological father's side of the family after 20+ years

it makes me look funny at his fam tho for not wanting to reach out this whole time as well........fuck 'em :shrugs

 

[Real Lady]

I'm glad I didnt know my father side like that coming up, because my mother side is from the streets and so is my father side, and together they equal too much drama. My lil cousin got in a fight in the club, and she was getting jumped by my father side. (I still jumped in) I use to get in fights with people, and soon we ready for war I come to find out they my cousins. My mother side is wild and crazy, my father side is mean as shit! (my mother side is the coolest) plus she got young brothers (that could be my brothers)they look out for me.

 

[Idiopathic Joker]

Dont really know my father's side of the family. There is a few female cousins in there I wouldn't mind smashing. They dont know who I am...hmmmmmm

 

[American.Loo]

got this issue going on right now

I'm not interested in meeting my biological father's side of the family after 20+ years

it makes me look funny at his fam tho for not wanting to reach out this whole time as well........fuck 'em :shrugs

exactly. like i said i was 12 when i met my pops, but life was so good w/o that nigga i never once asked about him.

but mom dukes (she was military) got sent to korea for a year, so i lived w/ my gandma. he finally reached out because i was in his state.

being 12, i just went along with it. but one day my grandma on my dad side said to me "why you never call me?"

i was 25 at the time. i remember thinking "why you never CALLED me when i was a kid?!!!"

 

[kat2180]

Are you guys certain the other side of the family was aware that you even existed?

 

[Real Lady]

Are you guys certain the other side of the family was aware that you even existed?

my father knew I existed I just was missing. My father was in some scary street shit, and my mother hid me from him. He was out there @ the time, and she thought it would be safer. (and it was) My father is a crazy nigga, but I love him. He's back in jail now. He's been going to jail since the 70's. & my 2 sisters are angry with him, because he never was there. I am not angry like them.

My father side, are cold to each other, they will get each other banked and shot at in the streets, and they don't stick together like my mother side. My mother side will fight each other, but wont let anyone harm each other.

 

[Real Lady]

my step father was a hustling nigga that stayed in jail, but my real father tops his record, he's still "gang banging" lol....(but I'm not really playin tho)

it's ridiculous he need to slow down, now he is in jail for assault.

 

[jackthemack]

This is such a black person's thread

 

[American.Loo]

Are you guys certain the other side of the family was aware that you even existed?

In my case, yes. I'm certain.

Does your daughter see her dad's fam?

 

[BelovedAfeni]

reunited and it feels so goooood

always hurts to know how ur FAMILY reaaally gets down.

 

[RuffDraft]

I don't think he'd ever reach out and I don't care for him to either.

I think that if they've left you for so long, then it might as well stay that way.

As for T/S, it would be awkward to reach out to someone who they probably feel a little disgraced towards, thinking about one of their family members not being there for that person and then they'd have to face that issue head on instead of trying to forget about it... sounds cold, but I think that's how it might play out.

 

[JusDre313]

naw pops was always there but didnt let us fuck with his fam like that. hes educated professional (arrogant as fuck btw) and didnt let me and my sis interact with our shitloads of cousins (my pops 1 of 10!) because a bunch of his bros n sis were fiends and shit.. but alot of it had to do with him thinking he was better than them...

but as a father myself i can see why he didnt want his kids around fiends and shit, but overall i think he thought/still thinks he better than them. and im almost 28 and cant burden myself wanting to meet muthafuckas i never really knew...i got bills and shit

 

[kat2180]

In my case, yes. I'm certain.

Does your daughter see her dad's fam?

No, which is why I asked. I don't think his family even knows about her. I know she's got half siblings and I'd like her to know them since I'm not having anymore.

 

[American.Loo]

No, which is why I asked. I don't think his family even knows about her. I know she's got half siblings and I'd like her to know them since I'm not having anymore.

damn thats crazy.

cause from what you told me, yall were in a real relationship.

i'm assuming you've met his family before then, right?

that nigga got mad kids, it sound like.

 

[Colin$mackabi$h]

make my name taste like ass when you speak it

 

[Mellow Hype]

Saw my pops twice when i was 12. He gave me his football cards. Never saw him again. Never was introduced to anyone in his family. Never payed child support although it was needed.

The football cards were a good look. When i was 17 i sold 3 of them for $300 a piece. got alot bud. That was a good look.

IMO he's a douche and fuck em.

 

[tam]

I didn't meet my dad till i was 15... by then, his mother didn't want anything to do with me. she didn't believe i was his(he was a mama's boy) even after meeting my father,, he died almost a year later on christmas eve. she never acknowleged me at his funeral, that hurt. because i wasn't accepted into the family. it's f*d up how everything came about.. because at his funeral, ppl were wondering who i was..being that my "grandmother" never introduced me to anyone. his kids felt i guess obligated to speak to me.. anyway she died, and i don't even speak to my siblings anymore...


But such is life, i ain't trippin.

 

[American.Loo]

I didn't meet my dad till i was 15... by then, his mother didn't want anything to do with me. she didn't believe i was his(he was a mama's boy) even after meeting my father,, he died almost a year later on christmas eve. she never acknowleged me at his funeral, that hurt. because i wasn't accepted into the family. it's f*d up how everything came about.. because at his funeral, ppl were wondering who i was..being that my "grandmother" never introduced me to anyone. his kids felt i guess obligated to speak to me.. anyway she died, and i don't even speak to my siblings anymore...





But such is life, i ain't trippin.

yeah thats fucked up yo. but im pretty sure you aint trippin

the first time i spent the summer with my dad (i was like 13) we were at this cookout

and i overheard somebody say "oh, thats [my dads name] oldest son" someone else was like "he has a son that old??"

that shit was a slight ether. i was 13. to this day i can never FULLY look at that nigga like my dad.