Pros / Cons About Marriage

[2stepz_ahead]

The society we are living in doesent revolve around familly values or religion. ITS ABOUT ACQUIRING GOODS. ITS ABOUT PLEASURE. ITS ABOUT PAIN, SWEAT AVOIDANCE. ITS ABOUT OURSELVES.

Marriage is not the centerpeice of the materialistic, egomaniac, self centered society. IT HAS BECOME TO MANY A MEAN, A TOOL OF SOCIAL COMPETION,STATUS, IMAGE.

The city of New York doent need no god dam child to keep on functioning. A population gap will result to IMMIGRATION naturally.

Its another story in agriculture dominated states. There mariage and familly have there true meaning in there purest forms.

Shit is hitting the fan because we dont want to adapt, we stay blind to these facts.

I still dont get why people who are not into God seek marriage. Why the Tinder generation wants to get married. ITS NOT FOR THEM!! ITS NOT THERE REALITY!!

Hence that 7 divorces out of 10 marriages rate.

Who is gambling with these odds?

it's not for them....I can settle with that.

everything is now....no will to work for anything.

I am very curious what the future holds for them.

I'm not saying single is bad....

r

 

[LordZuko]

The problem is thinking there is a difference between a hoe and a regular bitch.

Because you contrive this distinction you end up applying the wrong solution to the problem.

A hoe is nothing but a female willing to use her pussy to extract resources from a man.

Name five bitches you know that wouldn't use their pussy to get what they want.

Being a hoe is a basic program of a female. It ain't even an intentional thought it's just the way they move.

So to say that you simply have to choose the right female ignores the fact that hoe is encoded in her. The female you with used pussy to get you, uses pussy to keep you, but you think she's above using it to get something else from another man? Why? Because principles? Hoes don't have principles. They don't operate on an honor system.

If you with a female long term it is because she doesn't feel she can do better than you.

If she does find someone she thinks is better she'll do something called monkey branching. Shell pull back affection from her current, withdraw from sex become emotionally distant pick petty arguments, basically tank the relationship until he breaks up with her. She will swear there is nobody else, but look on her fb two weeks to a month later you gonna see her boo'd up with the nigga she was cheating on you with.

Now if she wants a man who she isn't sure is available she will cheat but won't leave right away. Maybe the dude is married or has a gf but she will fuck him in order to mate poach.

Some females will play a game where they hook up with a beta for the resources, cheat with an alpha, get pregnant by him and pass the baby off as the beta's.

Lot of niggas outchea thinking they chose the right one. Holding Ls.

Paying child support on kids not even theirs.

I already went over the other Ls.

Understand the nature of the thing you dealing with

nooo no no

just no

hoes, slut. whores, women ....all different.

bruh you just...

nooooo

your veiw is jaded as hell.

hell yes my wife can do better than me.

she has options...just like I have options.

but she's with me....an I take keeping her seriously as she does me.

two way street

How old is your wife bruh and how many kids between y'all

@2stepz_ahead

she over 35 an had two kids BTW us. my kids.

what's your point ....I'm ready to fight

Point is she almost 40 with two kids. Where she gonna go?

Who would want her for an ltr? Nobody.

A nigga her age that's single with no kids in good financial position can get a 25 yr old.

A nigga younger than her is not gonna want her for an ltr unless he a bum.

Unless she find a nigga that is making twice as much as she is and willing to play daddy to two half grown Niggas, she stuck.

The only other move she could make is if she makes less money than you to wait till the kids are grown get a divorce, ball out on your alimony while catching young dick.

they my kids tho....she has no ties to me other than marraige an her wanting to stay

Damn so she like emotionally damaged and shit.

Or she could just really be a nawalt.

Can't call it but most relationships or marriages don't play out this way

but why think she emotionally damaged.

why cant it be that she saw a man...going all out to be a man. going balls out to fight for his kids while still grinding and finding time to do little things for her?

a man with responsibility and goes after them...takes care of them. a man with a life plan...an executes it or making moves to execute it.

you'd be surprised how many niggas say shit but don't do it. so when someone really actively goes after many things...it stands out.

it's about character. an integrity.

a good dude is a good dude...no matter the look , money or job.

we both got good ones.

Because the only females I've seen willing to play mommy to kids not their own are emotionally damaged. They got some unresolved child hood issues.

Bitches don't give a fuck about integrity or honor or principles in any way that does not directly benefit them.

so you don't know females who will see the character and/or potential in a guy?

it's something wrong with where you looking IMO.

there is a such thing as building with someone.

Is your wife fat?

lol

so you gonna keep try to find an angle where someone has an issue so they gotta take what they can get?

bruh...just admit YOUR veiw is jaded.

you been hurt bad or living off someone else's hurt or a millenial

So that's a yes. Yes your wife is fat. All I'm saying is that all you have to do is look at a bitch and her circumstances and that will tell you what's up with her. She's almost 40 and fat, maybe not super fat but she not tryna put her ass on the market.

That's why she was willing to earn more money than you, be a step mom and whatever other shit is going on. Age got no options.

 

[2stepz_ahead]

The problem is thinking there is a difference between a hoe and a regular bitch.

Because you contrive this distinction you end up applying the wrong solution to the problem.

A hoe is nothing but a female willing to use her pussy to extract resources from a man.

Name five bitches you know that wouldn't use their pussy to get what they want.

Being a hoe is a basic program of a female. It ain't even an intentional thought it's just the way they move.

So to say that you simply have to choose the right female ignores the fact that hoe is encoded in her. The female you with used pussy to get you, uses pussy to keep you, but you think she's above using it to get something else from another man? Why? Because principles? Hoes don't have principles. They don't operate on an honor system.

If you with a female long term it is because she doesn't feel she can do better than you.

If she does find someone she thinks is better she'll do something called monkey branching. Shell pull back affection from her current, withdraw from sex become emotionally distant pick petty arguments, basically tank the relationship until he breaks up with her. She will swear there is nobody else, but look on her fb two weeks to a month later you gonna see her boo'd up with the nigga she was cheating on you with.

Now if she wants a man who she isn't sure is available she will cheat but won't leave right away. Maybe the dude is married or has a gf but she will fuck him in order to mate poach.

Some females will play a game where they hook up with a beta for the resources, cheat with an alpha, get pregnant by him and pass the baby off as the beta's.

Lot of niggas outchea thinking they chose the right one. Holding Ls.

Paying child support on kids not even theirs.

I already went over the other Ls.

Understand the nature of the thing you dealing with

nooo no no

just no

hoes, slut. whores, women ....all different.

bruh you just...

nooooo

your veiw is jaded as hell.

hell yes my wife can do better than me.

she has options...just like I have options.

but she's with me....an I take keeping her seriously as she does me.

two way street

How old is your wife bruh and how many kids between y'all

@2stepz_ahead

she over 35 an had two kids BTW us. my kids.

what's your point ....I'm ready to fight

Point is she almost 40 with two kids. Where she gonna go?

Who would want her for an ltr? Nobody.

A nigga her age that's single with no kids in good financial position can get a 25 yr old.

A nigga younger than her is not gonna want her for an ltr unless he a bum.

Unless she find a nigga that is making twice as much as she is and willing to play daddy to two half grown Niggas, she stuck.

The only other move she could make is if she makes less money than you to wait till the kids are grown get a divorce, ball out on your alimony while catching young dick.

they my kids tho....she has no ties to me other than marraige an her wanting to stay

Damn so she like emotionally damaged and shit.

Or she could just really be a nawalt.

Can't call it but most relationships or marriages don't play out this way

but why think she emotionally damaged.

why cant it be that she saw a man...going all out to be a man. going balls out to fight for his kids while still grinding and finding time to do little things for her?

a man with responsibility and goes after them...takes care of them. a man with a life plan...an executes it or making moves to execute it.

you'd be surprised how many niggas say shit but don't do it. so when someone really actively goes after many things...it stands out.

it's about character. an integrity.

a good dude is a good dude...no matter the look , money or job.

we both got good ones.

Because the only females I've seen willing to play mommy to kids not their own are emotionally damaged. They got some unresolved child hood issues.

Bitches don't give a fuck about integrity or honor or principles in any way that does not directly benefit them.

so you don't know females who will see the character and/or potential in a guy?

it's something wrong with where you looking IMO.

there is a such thing as building with someone.

Is your wife fat?

lol

so you gonna keep try to find an angle where someone has an issue so they gotta take what they can get?

bruh...just admit YOUR veiw is jaded.

you been hurt bad or living off someone else's hurt or a millenial

So that's a yes. Yes your wife is fat. All I'm saying is that all you have to do is look at a bitch and her circumstances and that will tell you what's up with her. She's almost 40 and fat, maybe not super fat but she not tryna put her ass on the market.

That's why she was willing to earn more money than you, be a step mom and whatever other shit is going on. Age got no options.

smdh.....I just got trolled by this clown?

I thought we was having a legit convo

 

[ineedpussy]

I keep it a buck at all times. I don't know the man's wife personally. I just know females in general.

off subject but if this is so @LordZuko then how do i get a woman? i need love....cool j cool j *turn tables start to scratch*

@LordZuko so you just gone skip over my question bruh? cool. ill see you when i see you

 

[LordZuko]

The problem is thinking there is a difference between a hoe and a regular bitch.

Because you contrive this distinction you end up applying the wrong solution to the problem.

A hoe is nothing but a female willing to use her pussy to extract resources from a man.

Name five bitches you know that wouldn't use their pussy to get what they want.

Being a hoe is a basic program of a female. It ain't even an intentional thought it's just the way they move.

So to say that you simply have to choose the right female ignores the fact that hoe is encoded in her. The female you with used pussy to get you, uses pussy to keep you, but you think she's above using it to get something else from another man? Why? Because principles? Hoes don't have principles. They don't operate on an honor system.

If you with a female long term it is because she doesn't feel she can do better than you.

If she does find someone she thinks is better she'll do something called monkey branching. Shell pull back affection from her current, withdraw from sex become emotionally distant pick petty arguments, basically tank the relationship until he breaks up with her. She will swear there is nobody else, but look on her fb two weeks to a month later you gonna see her boo'd up with the nigga she was cheating on you with.

Now if she wants a man who she isn't sure is available she will cheat but won't leave right away. Maybe the dude is married or has a gf but she will fuck him in order to mate poach.

Some females will play a game where they hook up with a beta for the resources, cheat with an alpha, get pregnant by him and pass the baby off as the beta's.

Lot of niggas outchea thinking they chose the right one. Holding Ls.

Paying child support on kids not even theirs.

I already went over the other Ls.

Understand the nature of the thing you dealing with

nooo no no

just no

hoes, slut. whores, women ....all different.

bruh you just...

nooooo

your veiw is jaded as hell.

hell yes my wife can do better than me.

she has options...just like I have options.

but she's with me....an I take keeping her seriously as she does me.

two way street

How old is your wife bruh and how many kids between y'all

@2stepz_ahead

she over 35 an had two kids BTW us. my kids.

what's your point ....I'm ready to fight

Point is she almost 40 with two kids. Where she gonna go?

Who would want her for an ltr? Nobody.

A nigga her age that's single with no kids in good financial position can get a 25 yr old.

A nigga younger than her is not gonna want her for an ltr unless he a bum.

Unless she find a nigga that is making twice as much as she is and willing to play daddy to two half grown Niggas, she stuck.

The only other move she could make is if she makes less money than you to wait till the kids are grown get a divorce, ball out on your alimony while catching young dick.

they my kids tho....she has no ties to me other than marraige an her wanting to stay

Damn so she like emotionally damaged and shit.

Or she could just really be a nawalt.

Can't call it but most relationships or marriages don't play out this way

but why think she emotionally damaged.

why cant it be that she saw a man...going all out to be a man. going balls out to fight for his kids while still grinding and finding time to do little things for her?

a man with responsibility and goes after them...takes care of them. a man with a life plan...an executes it or making moves to execute it.

you'd be surprised how many niggas say shit but don't do it. so when someone really actively goes after many things...it stands out.

it's about character. an integrity.

a good dude is a good dude...no matter the look , money or job.

we both got good ones.

Because the only females I've seen willing to play mommy to kids not their own are emotionally damaged. They got some unresolved child hood issues.

Bitches don't give a fuck about integrity or honor or principles in any way that does not directly benefit them.

so you don't know females who will see the character and/or potential in a guy?

it's something wrong with where you looking IMO.

there is a such thing as building with someone.

Is your wife fat?

lol

so you gonna keep try to find an angle where someone has an issue so they gotta take what they can get?

bruh...just admit YOUR veiw is jaded.

you been hurt bad or living off someone else's hurt or a millenial

So that's a yes. Yes your wife is fat. All I'm saying is that all you have to do is look at a bitch and her circumstances and that will tell you what's up with her. She's almost 40 and fat, maybe not super fat but she not tryna put her ass on the market.

That's why she was willing to earn more money than you, be a step mom and whatever other shit is going on. Age got no options.

smdh.....I just got trolled by this clown?

I thought we was having a legit convo

I didn't troll you. You didn't directly answer the question so i inferred one.

It's not a legit conversation because you keep using anecdotal examples as evidence while i use data. Since you insist on using your personal experience, I'll deconstruct it.

So answer the question, is your wife overweight? Please answer in height and weight

 

[blacktux]

Great thread. Havent seen one "pro" that happens with a wife that wouldnt happen with a long term girlfriend.

Reconsider.

 

[EmM HoLLa.]

Yo but SOME of what Zuko is saying has SOME truth to it tho LOLOLOLOL

I don't know if you read the whole thread.. But I touched on that.. He aint all the way off base..

 

[2stepz_ahead]

The problem is thinking there is a difference between a hoe and a regular bitch.

Because you contrive this distinction you end up applying the wrong solution to the problem.

A hoe is nothing but a female willing to use her pussy to extract resources from a man.

Name five bitches you know that wouldn't use their pussy to get what they want.

Being a hoe is a basic program of a female. It ain't even an intentional thought it's just the way they move.

So to say that you simply have to choose the right female ignores the fact that hoe is encoded in her. The female you with used pussy to get you, uses pussy to keep you, but you think she's above using it to get something else from another man? Why? Because principles? Hoes don't have principles. They don't operate on an honor system.

If you with a female long term it is because she doesn't feel she can do better than you.

If she does find someone she thinks is better she'll do something called monkey branching. Shell pull back affection from her current, withdraw from sex become emotionally distant pick petty arguments, basically tank the relationship until he breaks up with her. She will swear there is nobody else, but look on her fb two weeks to a month later you gonna see her boo'd up with the nigga she was cheating on you with.

Now if she wants a man who she isn't sure is available she will cheat but won't leave right away. Maybe the dude is married or has a gf but she will fuck him in order to mate poach.

Some females will play a game where they hook up with a beta for the resources, cheat with an alpha, get pregnant by him and pass the baby off as the beta's.

Lot of niggas outchea thinking they chose the right one. Holding Ls.

Paying child support on kids not even theirs.

I already went over the other Ls.

Understand the nature of the thing you dealing with

nooo no no

just no

hoes, slut. whores, women ....all different.

bruh you just...

nooooo

your veiw is jaded as hell.

hell yes my wife can do better than me.

she has options...just like I have options.

but she's with me....an I take keeping her seriously as she does me.

two way street

How old is your wife bruh and how many kids between y'all

@2stepz_ahead

she over 35 an had two kids BTW us. my kids.

what's your point ....I'm ready to fight

Point is she almost 40 with two kids. Where she gonna go?

Who would want her for an ltr? Nobody.

A nigga her age that's single with no kids in good financial position can get a 25 yr old.

A nigga younger than her is not gonna want her for an ltr unless he a bum.

Unless she find a nigga that is making twice as much as she is and willing to play daddy to two half grown Niggas, she stuck.

The only other move she could make is if she makes less money than you to wait till the kids are grown get a divorce, ball out on your alimony while catching young dick.

they my kids tho....she has no ties to me other than marraige an her wanting to stay

Damn so she like emotionally damaged and shit.

Or she could just really be a nawalt.

Can't call it but most relationships or marriages don't play out this way

but why think she emotionally damaged.

why cant it be that she saw a man...going all out to be a man. going balls out to fight for his kids while still grinding and finding time to do little things for her?

a man with responsibility and goes after them...takes care of them. a man with a life plan...an executes it or making moves to execute it.

you'd be surprised how many niggas say shit but don't do it. so when someone really actively goes after many things...it stands out.

it's about character. an integrity.

a good dude is a good dude...no matter the look , money or job.

we both got good ones.

Because the only females I've seen willing to play mommy to kids not their own are emotionally damaged. They got some unresolved child hood issues.

Bitches don't give a fuck about integrity or honor or principles in any way that does not directly benefit them.

so you don't know females who will see the character and/or potential in a guy?

it's something wrong with where you looking IMO.

there is a such thing as building with someone.

Is your wife fat?

lol

so you gonna keep try to find an angle where someone has an issue so they gotta take what they can get?

bruh...just admit YOUR veiw is jaded.

you been hurt bad or living off someone else's hurt or a millenial

So that's a yes. Yes your wife is fat. All I'm saying is that all you have to do is look at a bitch and her circumstances and that will tell you what's up with her. She's almost 40 and fat, maybe not super fat but she not tryna put her ass on the market.

That's why she was willing to earn more money than you, be a step mom and whatever other shit is going on. Age got no options.

smdh.....I just got trolled by this clown?

I thought we was having a legit convo

I didn't troll you. You didn't directly answer the question so i inferred one.

It's not a legit conversation because you keep using anecdotal examples as evidence while i use data. Since you insist on using your personal experience, I'll deconstruct it.

So answer the question, is your wife overweight? Please answer in height and weight

nigga you can keep inferring.....

the point you trying to make is not valid.

Im using myself as an example as to why your theory is wrong. after looks. you'll try again an again until you think you disproved something.

she not damaged, so she must be fat, if she not fat then she must be anorexic, if she not that...hmmm she must be ugly. no? she gotta pee the bed.

nigga we can do this all day....

what data you got that supports anything?

 

[7figz]

Issues wirh marriage can be summed up in in one concept.

People are selfish.

That is the root cause for most if not all issues in marriage. Unfortunately, you can only control your actions and not those of a spouse. People can change too, so you may marry someone who's ends up being a completely different person. But that's out of your control.

Just make sure you choose right and somone you truley look at as an extension of yourself and vice versa.

... and a prenup ?

 

[blacktux]

Prenups get thrown out if the broad can convince the judge it was signed in a state of duress.

Reconsider.

 

[7figz]

Great thread. ...

Thank you sir. I try to put my all into these things...

Some of my other heartfelt works are:

- The epidemic of white female teachers raping students

- How To Win A Fight Against A Big Bitch

- White privilege being violently revoked.

 

[LordZuko]

The problem is thinking there is a difference between a hoe and a regular bitch.

Because you contrive this distinction you end up applying the wrong solution to the problem.

A hoe is nothing but a female willing to use her pussy to extract resources from a man.

Name five bitches you know that wouldn't use their pussy to get what they want.

Being a hoe is a basic program of a female. It ain't even an intentional thought it's just the way they move.

So to say that you simply have to choose the right female ignores the fact that hoe is encoded in her. The female you with used pussy to get you, uses pussy to keep you, but you think she's above using it to get something else from another man? Why? Because principles? Hoes don't have principles. They don't operate on an honor system.

If you with a female long term it is because she doesn't feel she can do better than you.

If she does find someone she thinks is better she'll do something called monkey branching. Shell pull back affection from her current, withdraw from sex become emotionally distant pick petty arguments, basically tank the relationship until he breaks up with her. She will swear there is nobody else, but look on her fb two weeks to a month later you gonna see her boo'd up with the nigga she was cheating on you with.

Now if she wants a man who she isn't sure is available she will cheat but won't leave right away. Maybe the dude is married or has a gf but she will fuck him in order to mate poach.

Some females will play a game where they hook up with a beta for the resources, cheat with an alpha, get pregnant by him and pass the baby off as the beta's.

Lot of niggas outchea thinking they chose the right one. Holding Ls.

Paying child support on kids not even theirs.

I already went over the other Ls.

Understand the nature of the thing you dealing with

nooo no no

just no

hoes, slut. whores, women ....all different.

bruh you just...

nooooo

your veiw is jaded as hell.

hell yes my wife can do better than me.

she has options...just like I have options.

but she's with me....an I take keeping her seriously as she does me.

two way street

How old is your wife bruh and how many kids between y'all

@2stepz_ahead

she over 35 an had two kids BTW us. my kids.

what's your point ....I'm ready to fight

Point is she almost 40 with two kids. Where she gonna go?

Who would want her for an ltr? Nobody.

A nigga her age that's single with no kids in good financial position can get a 25 yr old.

A nigga younger than her is not gonna want her for an ltr unless he a bum.

Unless she find a nigga that is making twice as much as she is and willing to play daddy to two half grown Niggas, she stuck.

The only other move she could make is if she makes less money than you to wait till the kids are grown get a divorce, ball out on your alimony while catching young dick.

they my kids tho....she has no ties to me other than marraige an her wanting to stay

Damn so she like emotionally damaged and shit.

Or she could just really be a nawalt.

Can't call it but most relationships or marriages don't play out this way

but why think she emotionally damaged.

why cant it be that she saw a man...going all out to be a man. going balls out to fight for his kids while still grinding and finding time to do little things for her?

a man with responsibility and goes after them...takes care of them. a man with a life plan...an executes it or making moves to execute it.

you'd be surprised how many niggas say shit but don't do it. so when someone really actively goes after many things...it stands out.

it's about character. an integrity.

a good dude is a good dude...no matter the look , money or job.

we both got good ones.

Because the only females I've seen willing to play mommy to kids not their own are emotionally damaged. They got some unresolved child hood issues.

Bitches don't give a fuck about integrity or honor or principles in any way that does not directly benefit them.

so you don't know females who will see the character and/or potential in a guy?

it's something wrong with where you looking IMO.

there is a such thing as building with someone.

Is your wife fat?

lol

so you gonna keep try to find an angle where someone has an issue so they gotta take what they can get?

bruh...just admit YOUR veiw is jaded.

you been hurt bad or living off someone else's hurt or a millenial

So that's a yes. Yes your wife is fat. All I'm saying is that all you have to do is look at a bitch and her circumstances and that will tell you what's up with her. She's almost 40 and fat, maybe not super fat but she not tryna put her ass on the market.

That's why she was willing to earn more money than you, be a step mom and whatever other shit is going on. Age got no options.

smdh.....I just got trolled by this clown?

I thought we was having a legit convo

I didn't troll you. You didn't directly answer the question so i inferred one.

It's not a legit conversation because you keep using anecdotal examples as evidence while i use data. Since you insist on using your personal experience, I'll deconstruct it.

So answer the question, is your wife overweight? Please answer in height and weight

nigga you can keep inferring.....

the point you trying to make is not valid.

Im using myself as an example as to why your theory is wrong. after looks. you'll try again an again until you think you disproved something.

she not damaged, so she must be fat, if she not fat then she must be anorexic, if she not that...hmmm she must be ugly. no? she gotta pee the bed.

nigga we can do this all day....

what data you got that supports anything?

You not gonna dodge my question then turn it back on me. It's a simple question. All you have to answer is yes or no.

I mean to blow up my point all you have to say is she not fat or ugly or emotionally damaged. You can't offer up yourself as evidence then refuse to submit to cross analysis.

 

[LordZuko]

Yo but SOME of what Zuko is saying has SOME truth to it tho LOLOLOLOL

I don't know if you read the whole thread.. But I touched on that.. He aint all the way off base..

Im not off base at all. I'm knocking them out the park.

You just don't agree that's fine. But your opinion is emotionally based. Means next to nothing in the grand scheme.

 

[aneed123]

Zuko just being real blunt like how us niggas talk bout women when we drinking amongst ourselves

 

[2stepz_ahead]

Zuko just being real blunt like how us niggas talk bout women when we drinking amongst ourselves

nah nigga drunk already

 

[blakfyahking]

I never say shit is simple. I know life ain't simple but we also know that people make life harder than it has to be at times by not doing simple shit like communicating what's on their mind. The situation you gave is different because anybody can be fired/lose their job. That's different than going into a relationship/marriage knowing your spouse don't work and has really shown no plans to but meanwhile hoping the "commitment of marriage" will magically make them mature into this person you want them to be. If she were to leave him for those reason yeah she'd be grimey and stupid to boot, but that's her decision to make and the dude can know he did his part. You also know there's a difference between somebody working for something bigger in a temporary position and somebody just happy to have a little bit of shit and not striving for more. The former is what you described not the latter. Would I fault somebody for being extorted? Depends on just how much digging they did before and while being committed to somebody. It's rare somebody does a complete 180 personality wise while you're with them. Alot of those negative traits people expose when they break up always been there in small doses people just ignore them or overlook them because they never think that emotion can be aimed at them. One thing I've always prided myself on is being very observant of people and their behaviors and even the people closest to me I would never think I'm above seeing the worst of them or having their worst traits aimed at me. I don't put that shit past nobody so maybe that's why it doesn't really register in my brain when people come with the "And then out of nowhere the bitch turned into the wicked witch of the Southside and got evil on me"...Nah yung. She always had that trait in her. You just thought it was funny when she was directing it towards other people and now it's coming at you and shit ain't so sweet.

As for your divorce you proved my point. You knew shit was going downhill. It didn't just happen randomly one day out of nowhere and that you were unhappy. You didn't just wake up one day unhappy. That shit is a process

@blackrain

my nigga that's why we always go back and forth on this topic cuz u stay on ur Wu-Tang perspective like "Can It All Be So Simple" haha

and maybe this is where age and experience is a factor because I notice u like to frame issues like they are just simple black/white scenarios

Spoiler

the way u speak on this shit, u make it seem like only mentally or morally deficient niggaz have to deal with adversity in relationships.....and the funny thing is we ain't just talking about casual dating, we talmbout this serious ting called marriage

u think them same niggaz who took these L's in a marriages only lost because they just didn't communicate enough, or didn't judge well enough, or were just too selfish? nah bruh it goes further than that

1st off it takes a certain type of mofo to even want to get married........u make it sound like all these grimy dumb niggaz in ur examples didn't choose to step up to exercise what they thought was the highest form of commitment........niggaz ain't just picking up random chicks and running scams on them to make an unsuspecting woman their wife SMH

99% of mofos getting married go into their marriage with the same intentions as u did when u got married

and especially if a low income chik fila working nigga somehow convinces a woman to be his wife, obviously he must have had some positive qualifies to make a woman think that is her best move

so for u to oversimplify any issues that leads to a couple getting divorced is plain naive

Spoiler

in the previous example I gave that is more typical of what happens.........cuz how can u from the outside assume what a couple had planned unless u really that judgmental/arrogant

men don't marry women hoping that they will change, so no man marries a woman hoping they will "mature"

the husband could feel used until he refuses to put up with it anymore......now he a dirtbag in ur eyes cuz he decided to cut loose a chick he felt was taking advantage

or flip it for the wife, she could've legitimately been trying to find work........meanwhile her husband tearing down her self-esteem and treating her like shit cuz she can't find a job and he bitter for having to hold shit down.........u mean to tell me u would judge her for leaving?

that scenario that puts pressure on a marriage is more common than u think, and neither party is necessarily wrong for how they feel.....and just talking ain't gon necessarily solve the problem

plus u said that people rarely do a 180 in personality.........true, but perception is everything.........especially when u consider folks who get married at younger ages

for example u think a 24yr old gon still think the same way when they become a 34yr old? hell u think a 30yr old gon be worried about the same shit at 40? u naive for not expecting some sort of change/growth........is it really unreasonable to be caught off guard when ur spouse reacts to some serious shit that u couldn't predict in advance?

u can say all day that u pride urself on being observant, but how do u evaluate ur spouse on some shit u couldn't anticipate them going thru?

ultimately there is no way for u to really know what happens behind closed doors in somebody else's relationship..........which is why it seems like people have superficial relationship problems that u don't really understand because u looking at it from the outside

so yeah u just say it was must have been some simple moral failure on somebody's part haha

but meanwhile real life is way more complicated than that.........like I even said about my own shit, there were multiple layers to our problems, it wasn't a surprise but u really couldn't predict what was going to happen until it actually did

had 1 or 2 things been different I could've chosen to stay......no one who ever really values their marriage wants to get a divorce

 

[EmM HoLLa.]

Yo but SOME of what Zuko is saying has SOME truth to it tho LOLOLOLOL

I don't know if you read the whole thread.. But I touched on that.. He aint all the way off base..

Im not off base at all. I'm knocking them out the park.

You just don't agree that's fine. But your opinion is emotionally based. Means next to nothing in the grand scheme.

Nope.. Not emotional at all.. I agree with a lot of what you're saying.. All I'm trying to articulate is that.. The game is different.. So you have to apply the rules differently.. We can agree to disagree though..

 

[blackrain]

@blakfyahking If I make it seem like it's so simple it's most likely because of the forum of discussion which is why I always emphasize I know there's more to any story. You don't know the true "why" behind a divorce unless you were there through the whole thing. So of course from the outside looking in w/o knowing the intimate details it's going to be difficult to find that grey area that the majority of things lie in. As for your examples in the spoilers...of course people change but there's certain personality traits you have and have had for years. Very few people get new personality traits from the age of 35-40. Of course you mature and become more of certain things but for something brand new about you to just emerge after a certain age? That shit I just don't buy. And yes there are niggas who do get married hoping that the woman will change just like women do the same. You remember that scene in The Best Man where Morris Chestnut was telling his homeboy how he thought the cure to cheating was getting married? You know it's people out there who think that stupid shit. I know it because I've heard niggas say it. Shit like that is what I'm talking when I say there's people who go into marriage w/ unrealistic ideas of just what a marriage is and how to maintain one. How do you evaluate somebody on some shit you couldn't see them going through? Well unless you've never seen your spouse in a pressure situation then you should have a good idea of how they handle situations when their feet are at the fire. Or at the very least how they react to any sort of pressure being put on them whether it be professional or personal. No you can't predict every situation that will occur in a marriage but to say you have no idea at all how you at least think they would react? Yes I'm going to say you simply didn't pay enough attention.

 

[LordZuko]

Majority of men aren't understanding what the problem is because of a basic failure to understand the difference between how men love and women love.

Men love the person. We can lust for anyone but when we let ourselves love a bitch It's because we see something about her that we want in our lives. Most times it's her displaying some maternal shit that subconsciously remind us of our mothers. (Men marry their mothers or mother like figure)

Men will fuck a lot of bitches but maybe only love a handful.

Females on the other hand do not love the person, they love what the person can do for them. They love that a man compliments them, offers financial security, can give them an orgasm, can buy them things. They don't love you.

Think it's a game? Next time your girl say she love you, ask her what she loves about you. 9 out of 10 it's gonna be something that you do for her, you make her happy, you make her feel special she loves you because You love her. Her love is transactional

How does this translate into marriage and divorce? Most women decide marriage partners on the ability of the mate to provide resources and stability. Females are security first at that time. The reason why females initiate divorce a majority of the time is because they feel their mate is no longer providing those physical needs, secondly, she feels that someone else obtainable can provide better for her, or lastly, through the state she can secure resources from the man while no longer being married to him.

Why can females do this So easily? Because they never loved you in the first place, they loved your resources what you can do for them.

 

[blakfyahking]

@blakfyahking If I make it seem like it's so simple it's most likely because of the forum of discussion which is why I always emphasize I know there's more to any story. You don't know the true "why" behind a divorce unless you were there through the whole thing. So of course from the outside looking in w/o knowing the intimate details it's going to be difficult to find that grey area that the majority of things lie in. As for your examples in the spoilers...of course people change but there's certain personality traits you have and have had for years. Very few people get new personality traits from the age of 35-40. Of course you mature and become more of certain things but for something brand new about you to just emerge after a certain age? That shit I just don't buy. And yes there are niggas who do get married hoping that the woman will change just like women do the same. You remember that scene in The Best Man where Morris Chestnut was telling his homeboy how he thought the cure to cheating was getting married? You know it's people out there who think that stupid shit. I know it because I've heard niggas say it. Shit like that is what I'm talking when I say there's people who go into marriage w/ unrealistic ideas of just what a marriage is and how to maintain one. How do you evaluate somebody on some shit you couldn't see them going through? Well unless you've never seen your spouse in a pressure situation then you should have a good idea of how they handle situations when their feet are at the fire. Or at the very least how they react to any sort of pressure being put on them whether it be professional or personal. No you can't predict every situation that will occur in a marriage but to say you have no idea at all how you at least think they would react? Yes I'm going to say you simply didn't pay enough attention.

u mentioned ages 35-40 but I notice u skipped over 24 - 34 which is generally the age when a lot of people get married the 1st time

confirmed personality changes or not, people tend to change and that is an undisputed fact

so yeah mofos bring out all sorts of shit at different ages........that alleged "mid-life crisis" shit is real.......and it can happen to mofos at any age of adulthood

people go thru shit and and even surprise themselves at how they didn't even know what personality quirks they had inside.......so how can a spouse confidently predict or even prepare for that?

u saying u should be able to evaluate ur spouse in a pressure situation, but that is bullshit unless ur lucky to see similar situations

and even still, how somebody reacts to one event doesn't mean they will react the same way to a similar event

u really believe u can predict in advance how losing a parent, or losing a child, or going thru a life changing event will affect ur spouse? that's why I believe u using naive logic

hell u even gave a movie as an example..........u really think that there are that many simple minded niggaz out here getting married? haha

makes me wonder how many allegedly stupid mofos u really know, cuz it can't be that many

for the record it ain't just dumb mofos out here finding themselves in bad marriages and getting divorced........cuz shit nigga even I was in TAG classes growing up :joy:

it just sounds like u need to keep living and maybe u will see shit ain't never that simple when it comes to relationships.........hopefully u will never have someone bust that bubble u living in