Should women allow their men to have a mistress??

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phantom0900;2017773 said:
Historically, powerful or influential men have always had concubines or mistresses because they could and wanted too.

Some people need more than one person to keep them emotionally, intellectually, and sexually satisfied, male or female. Your wife might make you feel warm fuzzy and loving and hold down the household, but Pam in the office might inspire you to make beautiful business moves, Toni in the gym might bring out that competitive nature, and Ashley might be the only chick that can check you.

All these relationships could be sexual, with a specific level of fulfillment his wife might not be meeting. Cats had harems for 1000s of years, ran empires, towns, and corporations in this manner, and it was effective. I'm just putting a modern twist on it.

Its definitely not for everyone, but not everyone is meant to be in monogamous relationship, and as long as all parties are up front and honest, to each their own.

Before your forgetting the historical context for polygyny in those times. Women needed men for survival purposes. A women couldn't go out hunt and provide security for herself. So she needed to be married off to have those things provided for. Plus there was no feminism. What the dude said was law and the "bet not," say otherwise. While I do believe that polygyny should be legal, it's not a relationship I would indugle in nor would I recommed it.
 
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Maximus Rex;2018620 said:
Before your forgetting the historical context for polygyny in those times. Women needed men for survival purposes. A women couldn't go out hunt and provide security for herself. So she needed to be married off to have those things provided for. Plus there was no feminism. What the dude said was law and the "bet not," say otherwise. While I do believe that polygyny should be legal, it's not a relationship I would indugle in nor would I recommed it.

Maxiumus you make excellent points but your answers are subjective. You mentioned that a relationship implies a man and a woman hold on to boundaries set by exclusivity, yet the only legally binding arrangement like this is marriage.
 
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phantom0900;2017773 said:
Historically, powerful or influential men have always had concubines or mistresses because they could and wanted too.

Some people need more than one person to keep them emotionally, intellectually, and sexually satisfied, male or female. Your wife might make you feel warm fuzzy and loving and hold down the household, but Pam in the office might inspire you to make beautiful business moves, Toni in the gym might bring out that competitive nature, and Ashley might be the only chick that can check you.

All these relationships could be sexual, with a specific level of fulfillment his wife might not be meeting. Cats had harems for 1000s of years, ran empires, towns, and corporations in this manner, and it was effective. I'm just putting a modern twist on it.

Its definitely not for everyone, but not everyone is meant to be in monogamous relationship, and as long as all parties are up front and honest, to each their own.

^^^^ Basically

If all parties agree, I don't see the problem.
 
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i couldn't do it. not in a marriage or long term relationship anyways. i still don't get why people like this don't just date around and stay single. although i will admit there is some sense of thrill associated w/ stepping out on your mate, or so i've heard.
 
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lighthearted25;2020883 said:
i couldn't do it. not in a marriage or long term relationship anyways. i still don't get why people like this don't just date around and stay single. although i will admit there is some sense of thrill associated w/ stepping out on your mate, or so i've heard.

@ the bold. Some people do it for the adrenaline rush that they can't seem to get over.It's never unintentional. It's choice that's made, in terms of actions, attitudes and behavior. Usually in a moment of bad judgment or immature decision making.Some people do it out of spite. Some out of boredom. Some out of trying to leave their current relationship. It purely plain selfishness,there's never an excuse for this. These are the type of people,that don't care who they hurt as long they get what they want. That why it's important to love yourself before you put your love into somebody else. With this topic alone, I will never disrespect myself nor condone to something like this. Sex is something that should be with one individual and within the relationship itself. Doing it outside of it, and it becomes nothing but a selfish desire, self control at this point is clearly gone.
 
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MeTaL;2021423 said:
@ the bold. Some people do it for the adrenaline rush that they can't seem to get over.It's never unintentional. It's choice that's made, in terms of actions, attitudes and behavior. Usually in a moment of bad judgment or immature decision making.Some people do it out of spite. Some out of boredom. Some out of trying to leave their current relationship. It purely plain selfishness,there's never an excuse for this. These are the type of people,that don't care who they hurt as long they get what they want. That why it's important to love yourself before you put your love into somebody else. With this topic alone, I will never disrespect myself nor condone to something like this. Sex is something that should be with one individual, maybe two in your life time and within the relationship itself. Doing it outside of it, and it becomes nothing but a selfish desire, self control at this point is clearly gone.

i agree w/ everything except for that 2 sex partners in ya lifetime part, that seems unrealstic
 
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lighthearted25;2021537 said:
i agree w/ everything except for that 2 sex partners in ya lifetime part, that seems unrealstic

hmm, I mean't one, I don't know why put I that there.. let me re edit that. *fixed*
 
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MeTaL;2021575 said:
hmm, I mean't one, I don't know why put I that there.. let me re edit that. *fixed*

lmao, i give u props, i think its a good thing but it doesn't always workout that way. and do u believ in waiting till marriage for sex?
 
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lighthearted25;2021609 said:
lmao, i give u props, i think its a good thing but it doesn't always workout that way. and do u believe in waiting till marriage for sex?

@ the bold.It is up to others on what they want to do. For me, I would not care for rules and about what other people say. I would have sex/make love to someone I really truly love and care for so very much within that relationship. Regardless of whether or not people wait, a purely individual issue that only YOU really know when to be ready, just make sure that whomever you are with, you can be safe physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually too. There are far too many consequences just to have sex. Trust, friendship and love must come first. Both individuals must have a connection a bond, between one another, because the flesh is weak.
 
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MeTaL;2021708 said:
@ the bold.It is up to others on what they want to do. For me, I would not care for rules and about what other people say. I would have sex/make love to someone I really truly love and care for so very much within that relationship. Regardless of whether or not people wait, a purely individual issue that only YOU really know when to be ready, just make sure that whomever you are with, you can be safe physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually too. There are far too many consequences just to have sex. Trust, friendship and love must come first. Both individuals must have a connection a bond, between one another, because the flesh is weak.

i agree completely,i just thought u were gonna say wait till marriage based on your previous comment
 
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