Pros / Cons About Marriage

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Lefty_;c-9973373 said:
Taking two personalities from two totally different backgrounds, with potentially two totally different sets of values and goals and meshing them into one unit is never, ever going to be simple.

Everything from diet, to conflict resolution will have to be "married", compromised and made to work for both parties. Add children and your goals as a parent, verses the goals as a parental unit and fitting both parenting styles together is never simple.

People changing as they age and being something different in their 40s and 50s than they were in their 20s and 30s is not simple. The what now after the children are gone and you've lost a part of yourself inside parenthood and looking at your mate and re evaluating is never simple.

The common denominator is love, and the way we maintain the relationship. That's why I said it's the heartbeat of the whole institution. If you found someone who you love, and who truly loves you, and you make certain to keep your core intact, and maintain the love you first found, shouldn't be too many problems keeping it going for ever even through all the strife that you're going to face, not probably going to..... Going to. That's the only simple part, that bond.

Everything else is walking a tightrope of give and take.

preach
 
AZTG;c-9972217 said:
i mean, past the pros and cons, first people should realize marriage aint for everybody.

marriage, just like anything else, has to be done right.

you got a good job and a 401k, and you marrying a bitch that doesnt even work? you done fucked up from the get go.

marry someone on your level. you a professional making x amount of dollars? marry a chick who is a proffesional and makes money in the same range.

marry someone who believes the same thing you do, you religious? make sure she is too. you family oriented? make sure she is too.

whatever your level of maturity is, make sure the person you are marrying is there too. you more mature then her and yall both bout to get married? you fucking up.

you cant find the person to meet this criteria? well fuck it, wait till you do. who the fuck gets married just to get married?

follow these simple rules and there is a high chance your marriage will be one that works out.

This is really all that needs to be said. Alot of the cons I often see mentioned about marriage is shit that should have been talked about before you even propose to somebody. Yes people change but most of this shit is just men and women going into marriage hoping that marriage will change someone into who they want them to be instead if realizing you just become tied legally to who that person already is
 
Lot of niggas let this lovey dovey romance shit fuck em out their paycheck.

You have to look at any relationship as a business.

When you are bf and gf you're two sole proprietorships going in on a business venture. Y'all break up or dissolve you leave with what you came with.

A marriage is a contract involving a third party (the state) that in the likelihood the legally binding partnership is dissolved, this third party comes in and decides how the holdings are split: houses, vehicles, income, children. And 9/10 it goes to the female partner because she makes less money.

If you take the emotions out of it, logically, marriage is the most illogical thing a man can do. But can't do a man's thinking for him.

Marriage is a business first and foremost. It is a contract. If you look at it like anything else, your pockets gonna get raped.
 
rickmogul;c-9972572 said:
Seen it from both sides. Sometimes when U'r in a neutral zone ( not married) people open up about their struggles and happiness as well. Pro: It will or should calm you down and centralize ya focus. Play time should be over by now. Cons: Trust. Not in a fedility aspect but, trust that when you say you'll handle something u do it. Bills, commitment that does not revolve around U etc and Score keeping.We a team baby not competitors. That's the gist of what I get when one of the homies need to get out for a drink wifey on their nerves.

That tit for tat score keeping shit is the death of many relationships. People trying to "win" and make sure somebody ain't got 1 up on them making discussions turn to arguments.
 
Shizlansky;c-9973337 said:
I came home to honey glazed chicken, real mashed potatoes and baked macaroni. Had my plate and we watched power together.

Woke up to a kiss and some pussy. I payed the internet and lights. We all good.

I love our life.

She sounds like a nice young lady. Post them pics of her pleighboi
 
texas409;c-9973486 said:
Shizlansky;c-9973337 said:
I came home to honey glazed chicken, real mashed potatoes and baked macaroni. Had my plate and we watched power together.

Woke up to a kiss and some pussy. I payed the internet and lights. We all good.

I love our life.

She sounds like a nice young lady. Post them pics of her pleighboi

Wild disrespectful.
 
The Hue;c-9973290 said:
Look niggas this shit is simple, all the pros of marriage is due to choosing the RIGHT woman and all the cons are due to choosing the WRONG woman. I can't stress this enough, if you're gonna bend the knee, make sure that woman deserves to sit on the throne.

It's actually not simple at all. Choosing the right woman is easier said than done.

 
dallas' 4 eva;c-9973011 said:
My parents been married 34 years and they actually love each other, I'm so glad I don't know what a broken home looks like so I can't relate to y'alls stories. You just gotta find the right one bruh, think with your big head fuck what your dick says.

Oh yeah I just got engaged on Friday.

God bless and good luck. But nowadays ur folk the exception not the rule sadly
 
LordZuko;c-9973061 said:
atribecalledgabi;c-9973004 said:
aneed123;c-9972984 said:
atribecalledgabi;c-9972966 said:
aneed123;c-9972965 said:
gloomy as it sounds zuko saying a lot of blunt truths

"Every woman is out to get you" is true?

Naw but stuff like women mostly are the ones the end relationships... women settling ...women havin that back up plan... them taking all ur shit and older married men telling younger men not to marry or they wouldn't if they could 're do it..all are true

But all that is predicated on the notion of women being out to get you...

@atribecalledgabi. How you gonna ask that man anything when I'm the one that posted the info.

It's not about If "all women are like that" but enough of them are. The funny part about it is that female friends will stand back and watch their girl plot on a Niggas wallet. Either by getting pregnant and hooking him up on cs or getting married with the intention of getting divorced after alimony is a factor.

You not gonna sit here and gaslight a nigga. There are too many stories from divorced Niggas, Niggas whose bms withhold the children and stories from divorce attorneys for you to try to insinuate that I'm paranoid.

Like niggas don't do enough shit on their own to fuck up marriages. I saw someone say there's more divorce now than back in the day. Yeah there is because the stigma around it is gone. Plenty of your moms and grandmas would've left your ain't shut daddy and grand daddy for having another family across town or whooping their ads if the option to divorce was as accepted as it is now but it wasn't the norm so a lot of them stayed and suffered. Then ya momma and ya daddy picked up those same shitty relationship habits and kept passing them down only now we in a time where people actually break up over that shit
 
spit_fiya;c-9973494 said:
The Hue;c-9973290 said:
Look niggas this shit is simple, all the pros of marriage is due to choosing the RIGHT woman and all the cons are due to choosing the WRONG woman. I can't stress this enough, if you're gonna bend the knee, make sure that woman deserves to sit on the throne.

It's actually not simple at all. Choosing the right woman is easier said than done.

Simple if you know what you want and patient looking for it.
 
Lefty_;c-9973373 said:
Taking two personalities from two totally different backgrounds, with potentially two totally different sets of values and goals and meshing them into one unit is never, ever going to be simple.

Everything from diet, to conflict resolution will have to be "married", compromised and made to work for both parties. Add children and your goals as a parent, verses the goals as a parental unit and fitting both parenting styles together is never simple.

People changing as they age and being something different in their 40s and 50s than they were in their 20s and 30s is not simple. The what now after the children are gone and you've lost a part of yourself inside parenthood and looking at your mate and re evaluating is never simple.

The common denominator is love, and the way we maintain the relationship. That's why I said it's the heartbeat of the whole institution. If you found someone who you love, and who truly loves you, and you make certain to keep your core intact, and maintain the love you first found, shouldn't be too many problems keeping it going for ever even through all the strife that you're going to face, not probably going to..... Going to. That's the only simple part, that bond.

Everything else is walking a tightrope of give and take.

The problem lies in the very first thing you said. Marriage is about the foundation you start it on. Meaning you have to be with someone who has the same morals and values as you because if you don't its going to be a rocky build
 

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