For all my people here that DON'T have children.

[b'mer...]

 

[Shizlansky]

I don't consider myself a young parent.

 

[MsSouthern]

Lol ...now you are just making things up to fit what you think happened

 

[EmM HoLLa.]

I'm 34.. Had my son when I was 33.. I waited.. To find the right mate and for my financial situation to be comfortable enough to where I could make sure my child was straight and still blow a bag doing what I did before I became a parent... I'd suggest you all do the same. Nobody is saying rush to have children. We are saying under the right circumstance parenthood is dope..

 

[SimplyKrys]

I'm glad I had my son when I did

Never wanted to be the old lady mom at the elementary school lol

Lol @ old lady mom but at the rate I'm going that's probably going to be me. But on another note when I was in HS and I would hear these kids say, my mom is 30 something I would think to myself, that's embarrassing. I'm glad my mom didn't have me super young or that I didn't have a kid young af either.

Embarrassing ??? Why ???

I can guarantee we have provided our son a better life than a lot of his friends parents. And I'm not talking financially either

I was always way more involved than they were. Had the energy and desire to make sure he enjoyed life. Most are 10 years plus my senior.

@MsSouthern because if you are 30 something with a high schooler it means you had a kid rather young and let's be honest here who really plans to have a kid when they are 14-21? When your kid gets older he is going to realize he wasn't planned and was born to a teenager or someone who just became legal drinking age. My mom had my brother at 21 and married his dad while she was knocked up and that's probably the only reason they even got married and that didn't last long because she had my other brother at 26. I feel like it's not a good idea to have a child in your 20's at all, that is when you should be concentrating on your education and bettering yourself. I'm giving myself at least two more years to have a baby. If I end up being damn near 40 when I'm having the baby that's fine too.

 

[2stepz_ahead]

I'm glad I had my son when I did

Never wanted to be the old lady mom at the elementary school lol

Lol @ old lady mom but at the rate I'm going that's probably going to be me. But on another note when I was in HS and I would hear these kids say, my mom is 30 something I would think to myself, that's embarrassing. I'm glad my mom didn't have me super young or that I didn't have a kid young af either.

Embarrassing ??? Why ???

I can guarantee we have provided our son a better life than a lot of his friends parents. And I'm not talking financially either

I was always way more involved than they were. Had the energy and desire to make sure he enjoyed life. Most are 10 years plus my senior.

@MsSouthern because if you are 30 something with a high schooler it means you had a kid rather young and let's be honest here who really plans to have a kid when they are 14-21? When your kid gets older he is going to realize he wasn't planned and was born to a teenager or someone who just became legal drinking age. My mom had my brother at 21 and married his dad while she was knocked up and that's probably the only reason they even got married and that didn't last long because she had my other brother at 26. I feel like it's not a good idea to have a child in your 20's at all, that is when you should be concentrating on your education and bettering yourself. I'm giving myself at least two more years to have a baby. If I end up being damn near 40 when I'm having the baby that's fine too.

it's funny how people can judge those who had kids but don't want to be judge for their reasons for not having kids...... crazy huh

 

[2stepz_ahead]

their are slot of complications have a kid at 40. you may still not be mentally ready and you you may still not be financially ready.

I guess this thread can be ended....

cuz it seems like people are missing what most people are saying.

no one is saying have a kid....we mostly are saying...

ahh fukk it.

you will understand when the time comes

 

[CapitalB]

I'm 34.. Had my son when I was 33.. I waited.. To find the right mate and for my financial situation to be comfortable enough to where I could make sure my child was straight and still blow a bag doing what I did before I became a parent... I'd suggest you all do the same. Nobody is saying rush to have children. We are saying under the right circumstance parenthood is dope..

this is all im advocating...

 

[traestar]

I'm 31 with no children. I do want kids but I've been fully dialed into my career and creating a comfortable lifestyle.

 

[MrMinimalist]

The only thing that would slow me down with kids is traveling. As I mentioned before, get your money right and get in a lot of traveling plus choose a person where you keep your positive identities while having the same values.

 

[CottonCitySlim]

Yo who the fuck calls their ex-wife........................................their baby mama? Baby mama is designated for that chick that never got a ring or even an invitation.

I call my ex wife, Baby moms or my daughters mother. The Last one is i use most the time depending on who im talking to

 

[kzzl]

I will say this; before you have kids then make sure you are financially stable & great at budgeting. There's parents out here that been making a minimum of $32,640 a year for 15 years but when the child is old enough to drive. The parents doesn't have at least $1,500 a piece to offer half on a car. I be looking like "damn yall should've been in BMF.......................because yall blow money fast" smdh

your never financially stable for kids....

the bigger your account the bigger the life you'll live.

a long time job can downsize an let ya ass go.

so many things can happen...but you don't just stop living because of the what ifs.

so many things can go wrong.... an yet so many things can go right....you might raise a doctor or top engineer. that will take care of all your bills an buy the house you always wanted...

it all boils down to perspective...

but if kids will slow you down...then I guess it's safe to assume you are moving in the right direction in life

When you're kids clothes come from the salvation army, when you ain't consistently got lights on in your house, when you don't know when or if that next meal is coming, you ain't financially stable.

As Bossexcellence edited so slyly, not prepared. Cause poor planning is some horrible shit to put a child through willingly. You ain't gotta be rich, but you better be financially stable before you try to raise one.

"If you can't feed the baby, don't have the baby"- Micheal Jackson

all the things you named can happen to someone financially stable with huge savings.

you have no idea the things that can drain you

You're the one acting like you dont know about what can drain folks. Fairytale sayings of why a person shouldn't worry about being financially stable. Money is key to survival in America. Diapers, milk, health insurance, clothes... that shit requires money. Money a parent needs to have. The stress of not being able to provide that drains people to the point of adoption, abandonment, abortion, crime, and even suicide.

It doesnt matter if it can happen later, the point is to make the best decision at the time. For a nigga that's always speaking on the bad choices, fucked up priorities, and bad investments nigga make you being real hypocritical right now. This is a childs life, something way more important than starting a business, so no reason to get reckless now.

Its easy for him to say cause he's well off, at least by his post in many other threads. Thats not normal.

what's not normal?

I wouldn't say I'm well off...I'm cool. but I did it while I had kids. that's my point.

kids don't stop anything unless you allow it.

y'all niggas sound like a woman the won't go to college cuz she got a baby.

you will do what you want when you want. some people may need an excuse to get out of what they really didn't want to do.

just some people understand they have kids but must do better.

if you don't want kids... its as simple as you just don't want them. or not ready. anything else you will have to adapt to.

I never heard someone say....after this next check. we ready to have kids.

I'm not trynna talk anyone unto having them...I'm just saying the reasoning is flawed when it should just be simple.

You living above the household medium while u had kids was never the point here, pretty sure having kids motivates people to work harder to get to a point where it's no longer an issue. This was never an argument. Somehow u made it like that without being "hindered" by your kids, cool that's u, almost positive that's not the norm, at least from my perspective from all of the family and friends that I know that have a kid(s). At some point it was like, "damn I can't do this or that cause I have to pay for this for my kid or I don't wanna leave my child with this person for that long" these are all facts that I witnessed with my own eyes. U may call that "allowing it to happen cause of your child", I call it being apart of having a child, sacrificing some things for your child. Some people don't wanna go through that part.

right....i get where your coming from. not sayung it's not true. but the common thing I see...Is people making other peoples decisions sway their decision making.

Like with what you just said...to hear someone make it seem like they have to sacrifice because the kif needs something... that's that persons poor planning or selfishness.thats not your reality and you may raise your child completely different to never allow it to come to " sacrificing" for your child. that puts something negative on it. an you inturn hear the negative.

even with alot of money...a selfish person will make things seem like a sacrifice.

a person like @kzzl may just want things to be as close to perfect as possible or be able to provide a certain level of comfort... that's just not being ready yet. but when you think about all the things that can go wrong...that's something else along the lines of bring afraid of not being a good parent.

both are fine and ok to feel like that, just be honest about it and keep it simple. all the other stuff is fluff

but anyway....the people I know where not hindered by kids....those niggas was lazy before kids. now they have an excuse.

can i say having kids stopped fun sometimes....yep

but so did work, a sick wife, a sick dog. things gonna happen.

i just think niggas should keep it 100

The people i know aint lazy and those kids, their unexpected kids, hindered them. The problem here is that youre acting like that possibility doesnt exist. Based off the aint shit pocket of niggas youre always around and complaining about on here. You do that in a lot of threads, too.

To keep it 100 would be to say it depends on the individual and they circumstances at least. Using your own corner of bad examples to paint everybodies situation, that shit ain't 100 at all.

Your assumption about me is wrong btw, I don't believe shit needs to be perfect for having kids. I don't see anything that wasn't honest from me, so show me where I did that. But, I'd need crayons and time to make my point even more simple. I don't have either, so it'll be a minute before I respond, if at all.

And I could of seen he @d me a lot sooner if these ads wasn't blocking the notifications. What's up with that?

you know...maybe you having a bad day....you niggas get in ya feelings too fast.

calm down nigga.

Why you keep saying that? Or am I being trolled here? Hopefully, y'all got my point.

 

[luke1733]

Are you glad that you made it to the age you currently are without having any?

Do you plan on ever having any? If not then why not?

For me I am very glad that I made it to being the age that I am without having a child. So many people I went to school with already have 6 year olds. This one girl I was middle school with already has 3 kids one of which is 11 years old. If I were like my mom I'd already have a 6 year old and a 1 year old and they would have different dads. My mom had my brother at 21, had my other brother at 26 and had me at 29. I'm really glad that I have already beat her twice and I'm trying to also not have a kid at the age of 29 either. If I am going to have a child I'm going to try to do so between the ages of 30-34 because I don't want to have a high risk pregnancy nor do I want to be old as hell running after a teenager. Also I don't see myself having anymore than 2 children.

Are you glad that you made it to the age you currently are without having any? Am I glad? No, I'm not glad to not have children in my 30's BUT I am glad to not have illegitimate children. This in essence is the main reason I don't have kids. I do believe in being in love with the intent (if not already married to the woman) of staying with their mother forever before I have children.

Do you plan on ever having any? Definitely, and I don't like going into my mid 30s without them, but sometimes life doesn't go that way. Again, I would prefer my position without children than having to be a single parent and never being in love with someone who loved me just as much in return as a spouse.

If not then why not?

 

[ineedpussy]

It wasn't always easy. Especially in the beginning

But my son never knew.

It took a village to raise him ... I think we did a great job too

she's talking about the welfare system that she was on

 

[CapitalB]

<--- jus came for the 400th post.

 

[WickedGoddess]

I don't have kids and I don't want any.

Also, I don't want to get knocked up and left behind. Even being married is no guarantee anymore. Thanks but no thanks!!!!

 

[LEMZIMUS_RAMSEY]

me: why should a phenomenal bitch love u??

average nigga: cause i love me..

yall niggas need to humble yallselves..

i mean. less u a phenomenal nigga??!

if not be glad a bitch settled for ur ass cause what she was really shootin for was a phenomenal nigga..

yall equally yolked??

i dont see whats the problem??

yall can shoot for the stars but a bitch cant!!?

cant have it both ways my nigga..

STOP WITH THE SLAUGHTER PIMP !!!!

STOP PLEASE!!!

i use to think that way cause IT FELT BETTER.

imo you ATTRACT WHO YOU ARE.

 

[2stepz_ahead]

very true...

I attracted a business/career minded woman

while it's good we bump heads alot....but only to make ourselves and each other better.