For all my people here that DON'T have children.

[Lurkristocrat]

I'm 35 I want kids but was doing it the "right" way.. it'd a blessing and a curse. I want my folks to have grandkids but I see how my friends struggle with child support and stress with baby momas... I may just say fuck it soon tho and bite the bullet lol

Bet money yo kid gon be whoopin yo ass and eating the big piece of steak by the time he turn 16 lmao.

 

[Lurkristocrat]

i just like my life the way it is, it's that simple. and my husband and i don't feel like we're missing anything. especially with my step-son finishing h/s, i can't imagine starting all over again. i just never had the urge for kids, my husband doesn't want anymore either. kids take a lot of energy. i know whenever i watch my friends or family's kids for a couple of days, i'm so ready for them to go home. why do kids get up so damn early on the weekends? like take your ass back to sleep, it's 6 in the morning lol

Give the step son some pussy as a parting gift before he goes to college tho

 

[5onblackhandside]

i wouldn't want my kids to look like me, so i aint having any

 

[Max.]

I told this in another thread

My friend met his wife(now ex) in a bar...they dated...she got pregnant...he felt he had to marry her...a year later than break up she takes the kid...he pays $1100 in alimony and $800 just to see his kid 1 hour supervision...the bitch lied n told a judge hes a abusive drunk n they took her word.....he so stressed he goes to a counselor...

thats his fault for getting a shitty lawyer

He barely getn one..had to sell his car

 

[2stepz_ahead]

to all the people saying they have the same amount of freedom they did before they have kids, not sure i buy it. and i'm not talking about travelling or extravagant shit at all. can you decided to just up and leave at the spur of the moment without getting a babysitter? can you go out of town without getting your friends or family to watch your kid? do you get woken up at the ass-crack of dawn on the weekends cuz they wanna eat? can you decided to do some day drinking on a whim one weekend? the answer to all of that is no. i can decide right now that i'd rather go to a restaurant that isn't chucky cheese instead of making dinner

lets not even get started on how much kids talk, how much of your attention they demand. you don't get a second off when your kid is around. unless it's men who usually don't do as much of the caretaking as women do, i don't see how you can say having a kid doesn't eat up a large portion of your time and energy. i mean if you want to undertake that task, more power to you. but i'm perfectly happy not having to do any of that shit. and if you get fulfillment out of being a parent, great, but that doesn't mean everyone will or that that is the only way to get fulfillment out of life.

There's a bunch of shit in life that takes up time and energy. Some people just choose to devote that to their children. There's nothing wrong with not wanting kids at all. I'm a strong proponent of not everyone should be or is meant to be a parent...but every time this topic comes up Kai you seem to take a real tone of talking down on anyone who expressed joy in having their kids. Like the concept of someone actually enjoying raising a child is just a foreign concept that nobody is actually truly happy about. Life in general has things and people you have to be responsible for. It has things that will require time and attention to where you can't always just get up and go if you want. Shit if you don't have kids but you have a job can you just up and leave your job at the drop of a hat, or do you have to put in for time off and plan in advance for a vacation? Everybody's life is controlled in a way by something...and it's not the worst thing in the world for some people to have a portion of their lives controlled by raising their kids.

i have never talked down on anyone choosing to be a parent. all i am expressing is when i think of all that time and energy spent on those things, they do not seem desirable or enjoyable in any way to me. it's like a visceral reaction in me. that's how i know i don't want kids, everything in me screams no at the thought of it.

my work life is something that actually does bring me joy. i can see how it would be someone else's worse nightmare to be in a lab all day or doing tedious research, but it makes me happy. i know if i had kids, i'd fall way behind and i'd rather dedicate my time to that than to having kids. on a sidenote, i really could up and walk away from any job whenever i wanted since my man supports me and i really only work/go to school for my own fulfillment.

maybe i've gotten to used to only having to do what i want in my life, iunno, i consider that a blessing. but my days are my work, taking care of my man then spend the rest of my free time in peace and quiet and how i want to. i think my life is perfect and i have no need or desire to change it in anyway.

As I said it's good when people recognize they do not want and would not make a good parent. It's not something for everyone just like many other things in life. There's nothing wrong with not wanting kids. As far as walking away from your job, I didn't say you couldn't. I simply used the example of having to tell your job in advance when you plan to not be there to the what you were saying about kids being a problem in terms of how you plan out things in your life. We all have things in life we have to plan around whether that be a career or an actual person/s. Very few people's lives revolve solely around themselves. You may be able to up and leave your job, but could you just up and roll out of town w/o telling your husband? Would you not have to plan that out in advance? Do decisions you make not involve him and how they would affect him as well? And you may not think you're talking down on people who are parents but the things you've said before such as wondering if people really enjoy their kids because they do something such as ask for a babysitter so they can go out for a night...things like that just seems like a reach for a reason to say someone doesn't really enjoy being a parent as much as they say. Your life is not solely your own as much as you think simply because you don't have a kid of your own is the ultimate point of what I was trying to convey.

my nigga she cant up and jus leave the house either..

SHE GOT CATS AND DOGS!!

in fact..

she cant stay gone too long even if she did jus up and leave.. she got cats and dogs!

she may not have kids naggin and lookin for attention.. but she got cats and dogs.

she may not have to change shitty diapers and feed a cryin baby.. but she got cats and dogs. lmmfao

everything she stated outside of she dont want kids is null and void.

At least with kids.... I don't have to go out in the rain when the gotta pee

so you dont house train or "train" your pets

obviously they are trained...an that's why they wait to be taken to the bathroom..

smdh

 

[2stepz_ahead]

I will say this; before you have kids then make sure you are financially stable & great at budgeting. There's parents out here that been making a minimum of $32,640 a year for 15 years but when the child is old enough to drive. The parents doesn't have at least $1,500 a piece to offer half on a car. I be looking like "damn yall should've been in BMF.......................because yall blow money fast" smdh

your never financially stable for kids....

the bigger your account the bigger the life you'll live.

a long time job can downsize an let ya ass go.

so many things can happen...but you don't just stop living because of the what ifs.

so many things can go wrong.... an yet so many things can go right....you might raise a doctor or top engineer. that will take care of all your bills an buy the house you always wanted...

it all boils down to perspective...

but if kids will slow you down...then I guess it's safe to assume you are moving in the right direction in life

When you're kids clothes come from the salvation army, when you ain't consistently got lights on in your house, when you don't know when or if that next meal is coming, you ain't financially stable.

As Bossexcellence edited so slyly, not prepared. Cause poor planning is some horrible shit to put a child through willingly. You ain't gotta be rich, but you better be financially stable before you try to raise one.

"If you can't feed the baby, don't have the baby"- Micheal Jackson

all the things you named can happen to someone financially stable with huge savings.

you have no idea the things that can drain you

You're the one acting like you dont know about what can drain folks. Fairytale sayings of why a person shouldn't worry about being financially stable. Money is key to survival in America. Diapers, milk, health insurance, clothes... that shit requires money. Money a parent needs to have. The stress of not being able to provide that drains people to the point of adoption, abandonment, abortion, crime, and even suicide.

It doesnt matter if it can happen later, the point is to make the best decision at the time. For a nigga that's always speaking on the bad choices, fucked up priorities, and bad investments nigga make you being real hypocritical right now. This is a childs life, something way more important than starting a business, so no reason to get reckless now.

calm down nigga.

what I am saying..like I always say is ur never financially ready for kids. that's being financially ready for marraige.

if you have no savings... a big wedding won't be an option. but if you have $100k saved...you might have a big wedding.

there are not many financially responsible people...who would make the same decision no matter how much they have.

so simply you can't put a price tag on children.

as far as that other shit you talking about...you should maybe look a little deeper....um nit as surface as you think to make a statement like that.

 

[2stepz_ahead]

I will say this; before you have kids then make sure you are financially stable & great at budgeting. There's parents out here that been making a minimum of $32,640 a year for 15 years but when the child is old enough to drive. The parents doesn't have at least $1,500 a piece to offer half on a car. I be looking like "damn yall should've been in BMF.......................because yall blow money fast" smdh

your never financially stable for kids....

the bigger your account the bigger the life you'll live.

a long time job can downsize an let ya ass go.

so many things can happen...but you don't just stop living because of the what ifs.

so many things can go wrong.... an yet so many things can go right....you might raise a doctor or top engineer. that will take care of all your bills an buy the house you always wanted...

it all boils down to perspective...

but if kids will slow you down...then I guess it's safe to assume you are moving in the right direction in life

When you're kids clothes come from the salvation army, when you ain't consistently got lights on in your house, when you don't know when or if that next meal is coming, you ain't financially stable.

As Bossexcellence edited so slyly, not prepared. Cause poor planning is some horrible shit to put a child through willingly. You ain't gotta be rich, but you better be financially stable before you try to raise one.

"If you can't feed the baby, don't have the baby"- Micheal Jackson

all the things you named can happen to someone financially stable with huge savings.

you have no idea the things that can drain you

You're the one acting like you dont know about what can drain folks. Fairytale sayings of why a person shouldn't worry about being financially stable. Money is key to survival in America. Diapers, milk, health insurance, clothes... that shit requires money. Money a parent needs to have. The stress of not being able to provide that drains people to the point of adoption, abandonment, abortion, crime, and even suicide.

It doesnt matter if it can happen later, the point is to make the best decision at the time. For a nigga that's always speaking on the bad choices, fucked up priorities, and bad investments nigga make you being real hypocritical right now. This is a childs life, something way more important than starting a business, so no reason to get reckless now.

Its easy for him to say cause he's well off, at least by his post in many other threads. Thats not normal.

what's not normal?

I wouldn't say I'm well off...I'm cool. but I did it while I had kids. that's my point.

kids don't stop anything unless you allow it.

y'all niggas sound like a woman the won't go to college cuz she got a baby.

you will do what you want when you want. some people may need an excuse to get out of what they really didn't want to do.

just some people understand they have kids but must do better.

if you don't want kids... its as simple as you just don't want them. or not ready. anything else you will have to adapt to.

I never heard someone say....after this next check. we ready to have kids.

I'm not trynna talk anyone unto having them...I'm just saying the reasoning is flawed when it should just be simple.

 

[Stew]

I'll probably get this girl pregnant with how she looks within 5 months and thats fine I always wanted a kid.

Niggas kill me with the whole "I cant do w/e I want or travel to madagascar now with a kid"

First off, You wasnt going anyways

Second, If having a kid stops you from traveling forever than thats your fault

Foh I'm talking to my brother and he tells me every time he travels it's at least 10 gs cuz it's him, his wife and my nephew....and they travel at least 3 times a yr....I aint ready for that type of output

The kid ain't stop him from traveling though. Niggas like STEW think those trips to morrocco that he been planning just gonna stop lol

Bruh, that nigga a 35 year old roommate. He not thinking bout kids anytime soon lol.

This nigga worry about my living situation more than anybody I know. Pathetic, gay and unusual.

 

[Stew]

I will say this; before you have kids then make sure you are financially stable & great at budgeting. There's parents out here that been making a minimum of $32,640 a year for 15 years but when the child is old enough to drive. The parents doesn't have at least $1,500 a piece to offer half on a car. I be looking like "damn yall should've been in BMF.......................because yall blow money fast" smdh

your never financially stable for kids....

the bigger your account the bigger the life you'll live.

a long time job can downsize an let ya ass go.

so many things can happen...but you don't just stop living because of the what ifs.

so many things can go wrong.... an yet so many things can go right....you might raise a doctor or top engineer. that will take care of all your bills an buy the house you always wanted...

it all boils down to perspective...

but if kids will slow you down...then I guess it's safe to assume you are moving in the right direction in life

When you're kids clothes come from the salvation army, when you ain't consistently got lights on in your house, when you don't know when or if that next meal is coming, you ain't financially stable.

As Bossexcellence edited so slyly, not prepared. Cause poor planning is some horrible shit to put a child through willingly. You ain't gotta be rich, but you better be financially stable before you try to raise one.

"If you can't feed the baby, don't have the baby"- Micheal Jackson

all the things you named can happen to someone financially stable with huge savings.

you have no idea the things that can drain you

You're the one acting like you dont know about what can drain folks. Fairytale sayings of why a person shouldn't worry about being financially stable. Money is key to survival in America. Diapers, milk, health insurance, clothes... that shit requires money. Money a parent needs to have. The stress of not being able to provide that drains people to the point of adoption, abandonment, abortion, crime, and even suicide.

It doesnt matter if it can happen later, the point is to make the best decision at the time. For a nigga that's always speaking on the bad choices, fucked up priorities, and bad investments nigga make you being real hypocritical right now. This is a childs life, something way more important than starting a business, so no reason to get reckless now.

Its easy for him to say cause he's well off, at least by his post in many other threads. Thats not normal.

what's not normal?

I wouldn't say I'm well off...I'm cool. but I did it while I had kids. that's my point.

kids don't stop anything unless you allow it.

y'all niggas sound like a woman the won't go to college cuz she got a baby.

you will do what you want when you want. some people may need an excuse to get out of what they really didn't want to do.

just some people understand they have kids but must do better.

if you don't want kids... its as simple as you just don't want them. or not ready. anything else you will have to adapt to.

I never heard someone say....after this next check. we ready to have kids.

I'm not trynna talk anyone unto having them...I'm just saying the reasoning is flawed when it should just be simple.

You living above the household medium while u had kids was never the point here, pretty sure having kids motivates people to work harder to get to a point where it's no longer an issue. This was never an argument. Somehow u made it like that without being "hindered" by your kids, cool that's u, almost positive that's not the norm, at least from my perspective from all of the family and friends that I know that have a kid(s). At some point it was like, "damn I can't do this or that cause I have to pay for this for my kid or I don't wanna leave my child with this person for that long" these are all facts that I witnessed with my own eyes. U may call that "allowing it to happen cause of your child", I call it being apart of having a child, sacrificing some things for your child. Some people don't wanna go through that part.

 

[2stepz_ahead]

I will say this; before you have kids then make sure you are financially stable & great at budgeting. There's parents out here that been making a minimum of $32,640 a year for 15 years but when the child is old enough to drive. The parents doesn't have at least $1,500 a piece to offer half on a car. I be looking like "damn yall should've been in BMF.......................because yall blow money fast" smdh

your never financially stable for kids....

the bigger your account the bigger the life you'll live.

a long time job can downsize an let ya ass go.

so many things can happen...but you don't just stop living because of the what ifs.

so many things can go wrong.... an yet so many things can go right....you might raise a doctor or top engineer. that will take care of all your bills an buy the house you always wanted...

it all boils down to perspective...

but if kids will slow you down...then I guess it's safe to assume you are moving in the right direction in life

When you're kids clothes come from the salvation army, when you ain't consistently got lights on in your house, when you don't know when or if that next meal is coming, you ain't financially stable.

As Bossexcellence edited so slyly, not prepared. Cause poor planning is some horrible shit to put a child through willingly. You ain't gotta be rich, but you better be financially stable before you try to raise one.

"If you can't feed the baby, don't have the baby"- Micheal Jackson

all the things you named can happen to someone financially stable with huge savings.

you have no idea the things that can drain you

You're the one acting like you dont know about what can drain folks. Fairytale sayings of why a person shouldn't worry about being financially stable. Money is key to survival in America. Diapers, milk, health insurance, clothes... that shit requires money. Money a parent needs to have. The stress of not being able to provide that drains people to the point of adoption, abandonment, abortion, crime, and even suicide.

It doesnt matter if it can happen later, the point is to make the best decision at the time. For a nigga that's always speaking on the bad choices, fucked up priorities, and bad investments nigga make you being real hypocritical right now. This is a childs life, something way more important than starting a business, so no reason to get reckless now.

Its easy for him to say cause he's well off, at least by his post in many other threads. Thats not normal.

what's not normal?

I wouldn't say I'm well off...I'm cool. but I did it while I had kids. that's my point.

kids don't stop anything unless you allow it.

y'all niggas sound like a woman the won't go to college cuz she got a baby.

you will do what you want when you want. some people may need an excuse to get out of what they really didn't want to do.

just some people understand they have kids but must do better.

if you don't want kids... its as simple as you just don't want them. or not ready. anything else you will have to adapt to.

I never heard someone say....after this next check. we ready to have kids.

I'm not trynna talk anyone unto having them...I'm just saying the reasoning is flawed when it should just be simple.

You living above the household medium while u had kids was never the point here, pretty sure having kids motivates people to work harder to get to a point where it's no longer an issue. This was never an argument. Somehow u made it like that without being "hindered" by your kids, cool that's u, almost positive that's not the norm, at least from my perspective from all of the family and friends that I know that have a kid(s). At some point it was like, "damn I can't do this or that cause I have to pay for this for my kid or I don't wanna leave my child with this person for that long" these are all facts that I witnessed with my own eyes. U may call that "allowing it to happen cause of your child", I call it being apart of having a child, sacrificing some things for your child. Some people don't wanna go through that part.

right....i get where your coming from. not sayung it's not true. but the common thing I see...Is people making other peoples decisions sway their decision making.

Like with what you just said...to hear someone make it seem like they have to sacrifice because the kif needs something... that's that persons poor planning or selfishness.thats not your reality and you may raise your child completely different to never allow it to come to " sacrificing" for your child. that puts something negative on it. an you inturn hear the negative.

even with alot of money...a selfish person will make things seem like a sacrifice.

a person like @kzzl may just want things to be as close to perfect as possible or be able to provide a certain level of comfort... that's just not being ready yet. but when you think about all the things that can go wrong...that's something else along the lines of bring afraid of not being a good parent.

both are fine and ok to feel like that, just be honest about it and keep it simple. all the other stuff is fluff

but anyway....the people I know where not hindered by kids....those niggas was lazy before kids. now they have an excuse.

can i say having kids stopped fun sometimes....yep

but so did work, a sick wife, a sick dog. things gonna happen.

i just think niggas should keep it 100

 

[Lurkristocrat]

I'd suggest every nigga in here get a bad chick as a friend.. Don't fall for her.. But just be the homie.. You'll learn a lot..

This nigga advising yall to be a gay bestfriend......

 

[2stepz_ahead]

I'd suggest every nigga in here get a bad chick as a friend.. Don't fall for her.. But just be the homie.. You'll learn a lot..

This nigga advising yall to be a gay bestfriend......

smdh

you don't get alotta chicks huh?

 

[Lurkristocrat]

yea, I run into em....

i usual try to pass off to someone...cuz I can't smash

so when we hittin the DR!!? hahahaaha

I got you...told you...I saw a chick....you need her in ya stable cuz she already doing it....so I'm sure a visa would be worth what she can bring you.

but I run into them in Swiss and Germany.... bad chicks that put illpix to shame.

Yo.. Ya'll niggaz hit the DR I'm rollin'! Ya'll aint about to be in Susea or whatever they call it without the kid.. Shiiiiiieettttttttttttt

sousa aint my part of town....I'm in the capitol when I'm there....or Boca chica or Juan dolio or punta cana

Last time I went I was in Punta Cana.. Don't know too much about the island.. I hear Sousa is where they they turn it up at..

Niggaaaaa its straight filth in sousa but u gotta know people or find a cool ass cab driver lol. Its also red light central.

 

[Kwan Dai]

There is never going to be a perfect scenario. And in my opinion when you choose to have children you should do it on your own terms. To many people are chasing the Jones's. I have provided all of the best for my children. However, these are essential life necessities. Food, clothing, shelter, education, and security. Any thing outside of that are extended blessings from me as a father. My children have been raised to respect that shit. No you don't just get because, you're my child or you asked for it.

Growing up I was cool and hooped with a couple of Indian brothers. Both of their parents were Dr.. They were doing very well. They were in a tax bracket higher then my family and we considered middle class at this point. So, anyways long story short. Both brothers HAD to work. If, they wanted new kicks to hoop in they paid for them. When, they got cars they paid for them. Where as I didn't have to do those things. My father just did it. But I believe this was done because, parents are trying to live out a life they maybe did not have. I am not going down that road. It's about being practical. We are not required to give our children some Disney Land life in order for them to succeed. In fact you will find alot of aint shit, can't get right muffacahs come from a life of excess.

 

[AP21]

Don't have any, don't want any if it happens it happens I don't wanna be 40 with my 1st kid if it happens, I'll throw my back out trynna hoop with him and shit lls

how old were you when you went "ooof" as you fell to the ground during that pickup game?

being 40 aint gon matter at all when you was doing it in ya early 20s

miss me with this Ax lol

Lol that was after a 4 month layoff, trust me I'm better then that vid but I'm good on kids tho

lol

i fuks wit you Ax lol

 

[EmM HoLLa.]

I'd suggest every nigga in here get a bad chick as a friend.. Don't fall for her.. But just be the homie.. You'll learn a lot..

This nigga advising yall to be a gay bestfriend......

This nigga @"Lurkristocrat " in here trollin' lmao.. Fuck you nigga! hahaha..

 

[SimplyKrys]

I'm glad I had my son when I did

Never wanted to be the old lady mom at the elementary school lol

Lol @ old lady mom but at the rate I'm going that's probably going to be me. But on another note when I was in HS and I would hear these kids say, my mom is 30 something I would think to myself, that's embarrassing. I'm glad my mom didn't have me super young or that I didn't have a kid young af either.

 

[AP21]

some of ya'lls life's aspirations are mind bottling

instead of being someone who is older and perhaps in a better situation overall to bring a kid in the world, you excited that you had a kid @ 20 when life was probably all kinds of fucked up so that you dont end up being the oldest parent at the PTA meeting years later...

i cant even...

 

[Kwan Dai]

some of ya'lls life's aspirations are mind bottling

instead of being someone who is older and perhaps in a better situation overall to bring a kid in the world, you excited that you had a kid @ 20 when life was probably all kinds of fucked up so that you dont end up being the oldest parent at the PTA meeting years later...

i cant even...

I think the wording might be poor. However, I agree with the sentiment. I am very happy I had my children young. I am looking forward to spending my latter years chilling with my wiz and not running around after youngings or raising teenagers. We are parents for life. It said, that the from ages 1-7 you play with your children (let them be kids) for our pervs out here. Ages 7-14 you discipline them and from ages 14 on you befriend them. I am in the befriending phase of my children's lives and it's mad cool.

 

[Lurkristocrat]

some of ya'lls life's aspirations are mind bottling

instead of being someone who is older and perhaps in a better situation overall to bring a kid in the world, you excited that you had a kid @ 20 when life was probably all kinds of fucked up so that you dont end up being the oldest parent at the PTA meeting years later...

i cant even...

I think the wording might be poor. However, I agree with the sentiment. I am very happy I had my children young. I am looking forward to spending my latter years chilling with my wiz and not running around after youngings or raising teenagers. We are parents for life. It said, that the from ages 1-7 you play with your children (let them be kids) for our pervs out here. Ages 7-14 you discipline them and from ages 14 on you befriend them. I am in the befriending phase of my children's lives and it's mad cool.

Ummmmmm...

Hmmmmmm......

You sir might just be the perv to feel u even needed to clarify what u meant by that...