KEEP IT REAL - How Hard is it for You to Communicate the Difficult Issues with your S/O?

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When Im first getting to know people I am not as open because as much as female say they want an honest guy...THEY DONT. They want u to "Honestly tell them what they wanna hear" lol

U kinda have to ease into the whole "being 100 percent honest at all times" shit.

But ive learned to be that way as soon as possible. Tell them exactly what's on your mind, exactly why you're mad, exactly what they're doing right. And make sure there's a lot of positive reinforcement also.

Too often people only sit down and talk seriously when something's wrong ("Uh...yeah...WE NEED TO TALK" lol). But 1 or 2 compliments that you actually mean or one of two comments about something she is doing right that you like can lat a good month.

So Ive learned to just be honest even when its uncomfortable. Its off-putting to some & may run them off. But thats usually a good thing.
 
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I guage the quality of the relationship by how open and honest I can be..if I can come to her and tell her I've been lying about how I get my money or that I have a kid stashed somewhere, then chances are we last but if she is narrow minded and only wants to hear what will settle her heart, I enjoy the ride and eventually bounce..I cant be with someone I cant talk to b..my bitch is a real warrior and it aint really much I cant talk to her about..she's a stand up bitch b
 
@kimi...must be that Scorpio blood! =)

Lmao @ dark..you must get semi-erect at the thought of me and Kai e-beefing!
 
so everybody is this thread is brutally honest and a great communicator? haha

SMH.............I guess I haven't had the luxury of living in one of those perfect relationships

which is why I'm single now and plan to continue to be for a long time

I'll be honest and admit that honest communication is not my strong suit because I've had bad experiences with it

I'm willing to take criticism, but my biggest pet peeve is to repeat myself or not be taken seriously

and people tend to not be responsive if you talk about something that triggers insecurities/grudges/etc.
 
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How you plan on spending the rest of your life with somebody if you can't communicate or have boundaries? Why start a relationship without those?
 
s_a_m_r_i_o;5008338 said:
s_a_m_r_i_o;5008338 said:
How you plan on spending the rest of your life with somebody if you can't communicate or have boundaries? Why start a relationship without those?

We communicate just fine otherwise, it's just the issues that may have me sounding insecure or may piss him off that I have trouble conveying to him.

If you're waiting to find someone that clicks with you perfectly in every aspect without any work put in, good luck with that.
 
We knew each other off and on for years, so we're at the point where we can talk things out. First time around we went through some wild shit (chick threw a cd case at me and busted my scalp, me pushing her out the door with my feet after she fell). But these days, we don't even raise voices. I'll stew for a few mins, then talk things out like adults.
 
lord_infamous;5008372 said:
We knew each other off and on for years, so we're at the point where we can talk things out. First time around we went through some wild shit (chick threw a cd case at me and busted my scalp, me pushing her out the door with my feet after she fell). But these days, we don't even raise voices. I'll stew for a few mins, then talk things out like adults.

awww....love licks....i remember the days smh
 
HAF BAYKED;5008439 said:
lord_infamous;5008372 said:
We knew each other off and on for years, so we're at the point where we can talk things out. First time around we went through some wild shit (chick threw a cd case at me and busted my scalp, me pushing her out the door with my feet after she fell). But these days, we don't even raise voices. I'll stew for a few mins, then talk things out like adults.

awww....love licks....i remember the days smh

Lol word... i'm bout to text her to ask if I ever choked her. I think I may have, but I can't say for sure. I remember her squeezing my balls in the middle of an arguement, I can't remember what the response was tho... i'm guessing choke
 
I'm blunt as a muthafucka do if I think/feel it Imma say it. Now the chicks I've dealt w/ before prolly weren't so forthcoming b/c I'm VERY non-chalant by nature. They prolly thought I just didn't care. I'm sort of like how Jim Jones reacts to his wife when she get loud on his ass LOL.
 
women talk all that.. be 100% open and honest shit, but the truth is most people cant handle the truth

so for the sake of our relationship and people's feelings i filter quite a bit
 
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I have no problem at all. If I sit on something it drives me crazy. I have to get it out ASAP no matter what it is. My hubby on the other hand is the WOAT communicator. He likes to brush things under the rug or pretend they don't exist. That's where most of our arguments stem from. Not what the actual issue is, but that he runs away from them. So damn aggravating.
 
MzGrahamBitches;5007820 said:
@kimi...must be that Scorpio blood! =)

Lmao @ dark..you must get semi-erect at the thought of me and Kai e-beefing!

Depends. Does your panties get wet every time Kai drops a post? Smh.

Anyway. It's easy to say "just be honest", but too many folks can not handle honesty. So isn't it ok to lie a lil on certain situations?
 
Honesty is the best policy - once you establish that base, it will be easier to communicate. My girl understands that and things are great right now.
 

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