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onthafly;c-9881596 said:charles2;c-9878125 said:onthafly;c-9877504 said:Rozetta5tone;c-9877344 said:Red flag when you said "her mom". Bruh that's gonna be your biggest pain. Even if your wife is willing to walk away with no hassle, her mother is gonna make sure you get put through the wringer.
I wish it were that simple for me. If she doesn't want to do shit, push her into something she'll be into. Some chicks are just used to being a significant other and nothing more. Chicks that jump in relationships really young tend to be homebodies and are suited to be a housewife. That's what makes them happy. Her identity is solely based on being your wife. You can't knock her for that. Bruh I'd take full advantage of that shit. You're free to do you, pursue your ambitions with no nagging. Man listen, don't be so quick to cut out on her just because y'all don't see eye to eye on some things. As mfs grow, ideals and thing will change. Truth be told you committed to her and to jump shit because she isn't who you want her to be now is bs.
Get some counseling, try to motivate her, expose her to some new shit and take from there. You never know what will spark a fire in her and get her up and running.
I'll give counseling a shot first. We tried it after I decided not to go through with divorce the first time but we didn't stick with it. She does pretty much let me do whatever the fuck I want as far as persuing ambitions. I'm 26 though and I see so many other women that I find more attractive. It's hard to gurantee that I'd stay faithful especially when she doesn't even want to get up and use the gym membership I'm paying for.
So you really mad she getting fat and lazy and you think every fine woman you see wants you. Stop being shallow.
If your woman is a good person that loves you and supports you, work it out. There's a lot of fine women out here but not a lot of sane one's, trust me.
Alright I know it seems a little shallow but here me out. The real issue is I feel like she's not even trying to bring anything to the table in this relationship. She doesn't work, cook, buy groceries, she tries to half way look like she's cleaning when I'm home but the house is always dirty. I feel like she can't stand the kids some times and it bugs me. I'm doing all the grocery shopping and cooking. The looks part is a bit shallow but I used to be skinny, and when she told me she'd prefer it if I had more weight on me I bulked up and put on size to make her happy. I was even happy making less money at my last job because it was less stressful but she all but told me that she wanted me to take the extra money even if it meant more stress. She won't go to the gym to get in shape for me or even go get some groceries after I made her get her license and bought her a car. I make my own plate too after I cook which I do after coming home from work or the gym. I'd be ok if she was at least going to school. When my family asks what she does and she tells them she's a stay at home mom AND she doesn't cook AND the house isn't clean, I know they're just thinking wtf. It took me awhile to realize that I was getting the short end of the stick and if almost going through a divorce over these same issues years ago didn't change shit then I don't think it's gonna change. The longer I stick it out and try to make it work, the closer I get to having to pay lifetime alimony if the shit doesn't work out. I'm ok with temporary alimony right now and I'll never have a problem with taking care of my kids. I just don't want to go through life stuck in a relationship where I'm the only one trying. I'd rather be alone and have friends. I've legit thought to myself (maybe if I just went to prison and got a criminal record or something then this relationship would make more sense).
Rozetta5tone;c-9876015 said:Truth be told and this goes for anyone looking to divorce. You need to plan at least six months in advance. The moment you decide to call it quits you have to start strategizing your exit because he/she may or may not be so quick to let go despite how negative they feel towards you.
You basically have to establish your post marriage life while you're married and without your spouse finding out. Shit is expensive bruh. Especially if there are several assets acquired during the union.
I liquidated everything I knew she could grab. Hid money, closed accounts, sold vehicles. Even crashed one. Don't get me wrong you might luck up and have some amicable shit but don't count on it. By the time I was divorced, on paper I didn't have shit but in reality I started a new career, had a house in escrow and childcare arrangements for my daughter. Bitch didn't get a dime and was looking dumbfounded when she peeped how I "came up" after the divorce. Shit is war my nigga. Protect ya neck