Married...Open Relationship with Major Kinks

[MsSouthern]

The irony in this is that in most cultures, men are traditionally allowed to take on more than one wife if they can afford them.

How do married couples deal with knowing that their partners are attracted to other people whether they act on their attraction or not, certain possible consequences in specific scenarios would make acting on that attraction unwise but as a matter of principle, I don't see why people make the distinction (between their partner's attraction to other people and their acting on it), it seems arbitrary and vague to me. Most would probably think it's a bad comparison but if you're fine with your friends having other friends, I don't see how letting your partner have sex with others goes against the "purpose" of marriage.

'Cheating' implies that agreed upon rules have been violated. People in open relationships don't agree to behave monogamously so they're not 'cheating' when they don't.

Well that is not how we roll in my world..... IMO it's glorified cheating.

I would NEVER EVER EVER be okay with something like this.

 

[Pocahontas.]

Well he broke the only rule you gave him.
Think about it, would he stay if the situation was reversed.

 

[Huruma]

Well that is not how we roll in my world..... IMO it's glorified cheating.

I would NEVER EVER EVER be okay with something like this.

Your opinion is wrong.

1. To deceive by trickery; swindle: he cheated customers by overcharging them for purchases.

1. To act dishonestly; practice fraud.

2. To violate rules deliberately, as in a game: he was accused of cheating at cards.

If you don't want to have an open relationship, you're free to not have one.

 

[Shuffington]

Damn.. he gets open season on the chocha... yet he keeps breaking that one rule and getting back with that one chick who is off limits? lol

das fugged up.

 

[Valentinez A. Kaiser]

lol @ the one rule.......the one rule he has and he still fucks it up! (pun intended)
Kinda like that one tree and Eve's bitchass going in for that forbidden fruit lol

 

[MsSouthern]

Your opinion is wrong.

If you don't want to have an open relationship, you're free to not have one.

really cause what the threadstarter is saying is that he is not following their rules soooooo I don't see how I'm wrong in this situation

and my opinion is my opinion ... if you wanna have a realationship like that go for it but don't complain when it goes sour

 

[MsSouthern]

Your post came off as being about open relationships in general being glorified cheating and not just talking about this case.

Most relationships go sour, wonder if open relationships success rate is higher or lower?

well I do think that... this thread is proof my opinion is not wrong

 

[Huruma]

Your post came off as being about open relationships in general being glorified cheating and not just talking about this case.

Exactly.

Most relationships go sour, wonder if open relationships success rate is higher or lower?

An internet survey claimed that 60% of swingers believe swinging improved their marriage and less than 2% felt that it made it worse. I vaguely remember hearing from another source that swingers were actually less likely to divorce and more likely to self-report being happier in their relationships but I might not be remembering right.

well I do think that... this thread is proof my opinion is not wrong

To 'cheat' is to break agreed upon rules. You can't break rules that don't exist.

 

[MsSouthern]

why get married if you just wanna fuck around ?

 

[MsSouthern]

For all the reasons that anyone else would get married. What makes sex so sacred, when it's just a physical act?

Which includes being commited to the person you married

sorry.... fucking someone else even with permission doesn't sit right with me

 

[Huruma]

why get married if you just wanna fuck around ?

Why befriend someone if you're just going to have other friends?

Why do you think that romantic love is only 'valid' when it's exclusive? Does it make sense that the basis of your marriage to John is your relationship (or lack theoreof) with Bob, Peter, Joe or other men? How you feel about other men has nothing to do with how you feel about your husband.

Which includes being commited to the person you married

sorry.... fucking someone else even with permission doesn't sit right with me

Why does 'commitment' have to exclusive (never mind the assumption that you should 'commit' to romantic partners to begin with)? If it doesn't sit right with you then don't do it.

when it's just a physical act?

I disagree, there's an inherent psychological aspect to sex.

 

[BlackThor356]

leave it to the women of the IC to attack the open marriage, smh

anyway ma, ur nigga is obviously still into this old bitch. aint no way in the world u gon tell a nigga like me, that i can smah all the bitches i wanna except this ONE and we stuck having this dumb ass problem 7 months later

 

[NYCeeCee]

leave it to the women of the IC to attack the open marriage, smh

Is it JUST women of the IC "attacking" open marriage? Or society in general? No one "attacked" anything in this thread. The t/s obviously has low self esteem....not b/c she agreed to an open marriage (which I, personally, would never do), but b/c she's wondering what she should do with someone who has repeatedly walked over and disresepcted her in their short 7 months of marriage. Why is what she should do even a question? What would you do if someone trated you like sh*t?

 

[NYCeeCee]

oh, and BlackThor, what about the men who "attacked" open marriage?

 

[MsSouthern]

leave it to the women of the IC to attack the open marriage, smh

anyway ma, ur nigga is obviously still into this old bitch. aint no way in the world u gon tell a nigga like me, that i can smah all the bitches i wanna except this ONE and we stuck having this dumb ass problem 7 months later

good lawd

not agreeing with open marriage does not = attacking open marriage

we are simply discussing it .

 

[Yummy.Lix]

I don't think an open marriage is right for you...especially with him.

 

[Niggersauce]

Even an open marriage has to have boundaries...

You not dealing with an open marriage though, you dealing with a dude you forced into marriage and he made the choice to do it on the whim...but he doesnt really want to be married to you. An open marriage can not persist if a person actually has "another s/o" outside of the main...if its just friends/flings where you might fuck once or twice and leave alone then yall should be good.

When a person is fucking someone all the time, there are feelings involved....open marriages won't work for someone that has feelings for someone else other than the main.

 

[Bwoahmizzee]

yall might as well do a threesome for real

ya shit is already open if you aint beefin w/ shorty get cool w/ her and get it poppin

unless you scared she gonna take ya man or some shit

I mean but ya know.............whatever

 

[vicvallin]

an open relationship is only as successful as the people executing it. if their certain boundaries that are set, but aren't being adhered to, that's not a flaw in open relationships, that's a character flaw within the people involved. in T/S case, your shit was flawed from jump.

 

[allisoncomm]

Oh, well... Anything is possible. And since life is one heck of an adventure, i can say that keeping an open relationship can be an interesting phase, if you're not going to complicate much to it. You just have to keep an open mind with your partner/s...