im disturbed by the rather common notion on here that u can get a chick preggo

[atribecalledgabi]

why marry someone you don't even like tho (in general, not in norm's case)? the kid(s) will pick up on that.

*to say you shouldn't have fucked someone you don't like in the first place is a foregone conclusion*

 

[Louis Cipher]

bruh...calm down

1st you have to realize that a lot of this baby momma/daddy shit comes from a lot of 'nonrelationships'....ie people that were just smashing...

a marriage spawned from that is DOOMED.

2nd...having 2 parents in a house that have a shitty relationship will in no-way benefit a child....

in a perfect world people wouldnt have children when they are in these non-relationships...but for some reason they continue to...for the life of me i cant comprehend why a woman would do this.

 

[Uncle Kingpin]

You sound real naive and idealistic. In a perfect world, couples court, get married, have 3.5 children, a house with a white picket fence, and live happily ever after. Back in the real world that the rest of us live in, most marriages result in divorce. Whether you have a child single, with a live in partner, or with your spouse, odds are the union wont last. So then what? The child still needs to be raised regardless. Is it the ideal situation? Of course not. Theres no lil girl in america playin with her barbies dreaming of one day becoming a single mother. What do you suggest people do when a relationship that produced a child no longer works? Stay, be miserable, and give your children the bad example of staying with someone you dont like because a child is involved?

Of course children can be raised properly in two separate homes, marriage doesnt raise a child, parents do you big dummy!

Happy 2 parent home>>>>>Happy 2 household homes>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Single Parent/Deadbeat Co-Parent>>>>>>>>>>>>Loveless marriage for the sake of the kids

 

[fiat_money]

Well it's true. You can literally get a woman pregnant without having to marry her and raise to kid.

 

[CeLLaR-DooR]

Happy 2 parent home>>>>>Happy 2 household homes>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Single Parent/Deadbeat Co-Parent>>>>>>>>>>>>Loveless marriage for the sake of the kids

Wish I could bold it twice

CS, by the way

 

[2nd chances]

i dont believe that shit..

in life we tend to work on things a lot more and put more effort when we feel we have no options..say you get a chick preggo and you marry her and your principles or whatever has taught you that this is it..u cant just quit..u tend to put more effort inorder to make the relationship work.but if you already have a background(say you saw your -parents do it) that tells u..well u can just bail. as long as you "take care of your kids" .then thats what you gonna do..!!..plain and simple..

a lot of arrange marriages over the world work for this very reason..its commitment knowing u dont have any other options..whether u do or not..instilling that principles help foster the union..and those kids dont come out any fkked up than regular american kids...so that argument to me is so overrated ..

but in our society its a selfish one it seems anyway where every one wants to achieve "happiness" even at the expense of the kids..if im not happy who cares about the kids..im leaving the relationship/marriage ..

stickign together teaches your kids commitment, cuz lets face it they're gonna learn that in life you gonna have to do a lot of shit u may not necessarily be happy doing all the time but sticking through with it is a positive personality trait..thats the way i see it..a lot of kids nowadays dont know that they feel their happiness is paramount to being committed to something that you may not fully be into...

 

[Louis Cipher]

i dont believe that shit..

in life we tend to work on things a lot more and put more effort when we feel we have no options..say you get a chick preggo and you marry her and your principles or whatever has taught you that this is it..u cant just quit..u tend to put more effort inorder to make the relationship work.but if you already have a background(say you saw your -parents do it) that tells u..well u can just bail. as long as you "take care of your kids" .then thats what you gonna do..!!..plain and simple..

a lot of arrange marriages over the world work for this very reason..its commitment knowing u dont have any other options..whether u do or not..instilling that principles help foster the union..and those kids dont come out any fkked up than regular american kids...so that argument to me is so overrated ..

but in our society its a selfish one it seems anyway where every one wants to achieve "happiness" even at the expense of the kids..if im not happy who cares about the kids..im leaving the relationship/marriage ..

stickign together teaches your kids commitment, cuz lets face it they're gonna learn that in life you gonna have to do a lot of shit u may not necessarily be happy doing all the time but sticking through with it is a positive personality trait..thats the way i see it..a lot of kids nowadays dont know that they feel their happiness is paramount to being committed to something that you may not fully be into...

answer me this:
how old are you? and how many long term relationships have you been in?

 

[-Vincenzo-]

why marry someone you don't even like tho (in general, not in norm's case)? the kid(s) will pick up on that.

*to say you shouldn't have fucked someone you don't like in the first place is a foregone conclusion*

@bold: bingo!!!

and if i kind of like her, i would marry.

 

[tru_m.a.c]

lol the common notion "on here"

u realize this is just a reflection of reality right

 

[kataklysm]

That's the problem.

People know they have options now.

Back in the day, what BigNorm did wasn't that uncommon.

If you got a girl pregnant (I believe they used to call it "getting a girl in trouble") you were expected to step up and marry the girl.

There wasn't a babymama/baby daddy culture during that time like it is today.

Single mothers were frowned upon so women back then weren't talking all that "independent, strong black woman, don't need a man bullshit."

Nowadays, most people are too selfish and aren't willing to sacrifice and put aside their wants for the needs of their children.

Sad state of affairs.

We call that a shotgun wedding down South...lol.

I think you should give it a fair effort to make it work if you end up pregnant, but keeping your child in a situation that obviously isn't going to work isn't going to solve any problems or do them any favors. I would rather deal with the problems that come from raising her as a single mother.

 

[nex gin]

I can't even answer this thread seriously. Really t/s.......really? smdh

 

[-Vincenzo-]

lol the common notion "on here"

u realize this is just a reflection of reality right

no, actually not. it's just a reflection of reality right "on here".there are billions of people with a different mindset.

 

[7figz]

but youdont have to marry her to raise the kid..based on the big norm thread..a bunch of you never had two parent ass negroes coming in clowning him for marrying a chick that he was screwing who happened to end up pregnant..

it doesnt surprise me though, because niggas that never had 2 parents good or bad...tend not to understand the significance of having two parents atleast in the formative years of a kids life...i see yall as handicapped..

no wonder this society is shit..especially niggas!.............every other community does it ..and the kid gets an understanding of how things are supposed to be, so even if it doesnt work out with the parents the kidwould still know how to go about theirs..

but yet you fools talking about you jsut be baby mama baby daddy and "take care of your seed"...there's more to it than just putting food in your kids mouth or buying them clothes..they learn by seeing and the tradition goes on down the line...

Nigga, you sound stupid.

There's a ton of reasons (especially for a man) not to get married.

* Raised with both parents (married) post *

 

[bignorm73]

I see my thread spawned a thread. lol.

Anyway, i never said everyone should do what i did.

But, i considered everything yall talking about.

I was raised that once you have a kid, your life aint about you no more.

OUr generation is so selfish, that that seems like blasphemy to us.

Thats why you have loads and loads of women/men drop they kids off to they parents

and go clubbin every weekend. Not raising they kids right cuz they tired when they get off work.

All that shit. Peoples first response is "fuck that I am not doing that, why do that to myself"

I wont be like that.

I know it aint about me, thats all.

Out of all the marriages that exist, there are almost NO men who are married who would not rather be single.

Thats just the way it is. The ones that you think are, are doing what i am, they are acting. Point blank period.

They may be content, they are not happy. Why you think men dont play a big part in wedding planning?

Anyway, i am very content and very happy with my decision. I mean, she aint have to go along with it.

It aint like she aint know what it was.

 

[American.Loo]

Out of all the marriages that exist, there are almost NO men who are married who would not rather be single.Thats just the way it is. The ones that you think are, are doing what i am, they are acting. Point blank period.

They may be content, they are not happy. Why you think men dont play a big part in wedding planning?

Anyway, i am very content and very happy with my decision. I mean, she aint have to go along with it.

It aint like she aint know what it was.

Is the bolded true?

Most married men would rather be single?

 

[kataklysm]

I think Norm is just trying to make himself feel better.

Alot of men can't even handle being single. They NEED a woman in their life.

 

[bignorm73]

Is the bolded true?

Most married men would rather be single?

All you have to do, is listen to these dudes on here making fun of marriage and married men for your answer lol

 

[bignorm73]

I think Norm is just trying to make himself feel better.

Alot of men can't even handle being single. They NEED a woman in their life.

I dont feel bad, why do i need to feel better?

And how you figure a man NEEDS a woman in his life? lol.

I think that is backwards honestly.

 

[American.Loo]

I think Norm is just trying to make himself feel better.

Alot of men can't even handle being single. They NEED a woman in their life.

What the hell are you talking about.

 

[bignorm73]

i can see why you choose to do what you did. but i can not agree with the bolded at all. seems you're projecting a lilttle bit. if a man is not being forced because of kids or other outside influences, why else would he ask a chick to marry him if he wouldn't rather be married to her than be single? just because you are only going through the motions and acting like you're happy doesn't mean that is the reality for all married men.

you ever think that if you hadn't gotten married for the kids you wouldn't have to act and pretend, and would actually feel those feelings for real?

I have had those feelings before, and i love my wife now, but that love has come out of the mutual bond of raising a family together.

Would i have been in love with her? nah. But i have been in love before, and have no problem with that state.

All i am saying, is that for most men marriage is the end of the line, not the beginning. Men dont grow up fantasizing about being

married , or there wedding. They want to be a bachelor, or be a father. marriage is a means to an end to being a father/having a family.

Unless you meet/marry your dream woman. Which dont happen to most guys.