Years ago I was doing landscaping work. We all over Louisiana doing maintenance work on right-aways for company's like Exxon, Chevron, and etc. These right-aways were lamp post and sign markers that indicated the location of pipes underground. Many of these rightaways went into what they called, "god's country". Untouched wilderness and little to no signs of civilization, save for giant power lines that shared the clearings with the right-away markers.
I'll be damned, there's actually a picture online of one...
Now to the story. Me and my foreman, cool guy I'd get high with, was out in Avonyelles Parish I think. Miles from civilization and 30 minutes off the main road, down an abandoned dirt road, to the markers. I should of known my black ass didn't need to be out there off that alone. But it's a fresh Monday morning with the sausage egg and cheese breakfast.
Not that shit from McDonalds, I'm talking bout the scrambled eggs falling out the biscuit shit. With the fresh slice of Kraft cheese melting softly on the fresh off the fryer Jimmy Dean sausage patty and chased by the icest coldest Minute Maid orange juice I ever had. All served by the sweetest creole woman I couldn't understand when she talked.
Anyway, I tell that nigga to hand me a the star blade, big ass steel ninja star looking shit you put on a weed-eater. I was ready to work after that most important meal of the day.
I rev up and get busy. Cutting and swinging and slicing and waving that shit on 3ft grass like I was the next John Henry. On one particular swing as I balanced the inertia for another swipe, my "perriffial" vision caught a slender streak of blackness scurrying on the ground to my side.
I looked down and see my feets surrounded by baby snakes like Orichimaru was vomiting a forbidden jutsu. A nigga done fucked around and swiped at a damn snake nest. The little shits is slithering every where. That next swipe with the weed eater turned into the best toss of company tools I ever threw. All that momentum and panic made me let go of that weed-eater mid swing. I flung that bitch like Koba was throwing apes and ran like a bitch back to the bed of the company truck.
My foreman was ahead of me on the tractor with the bush-hog. I guess he saw me taking flight and rode up to see what was wrong. Told him what happened and he just used the tractor to clear the rest of the area. Nigga said he seen all kinds of shit in the grass, but they were just as scared of us as we were of them. He picked the weed-eater back up while out on the tractor after he was done.
Now, I'm alive to tell y'all about it.