A wise man once said...

[NIKE...]

A friend with weed is a friend indeed..

-some stoner from the 70's

 

[unspoken_respect]

"If the kid calls his grandma mommy and his momma Pam, he going to jail."

 

[ineedpussy]

"if you dont cum when i cum cum when i come back."

 

[7figz]

Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?

 

[700]

dont fuck hoes that look like this

 

[Rasta.]

"A cow never knows the importance of its tail unless it's cut off" (You never know what you got unless you lose it).

 

[Idiopathic Joker]

"I have candy."

Supreme_Mind999

 

[NIKE...]

One glass of wine and you're as docile as a lamb, two glasses of wine and you're as brave as a lion, three glasses of wine and you're rolling in the mud like a pig..

-some hebrew math I peeped when I was going thru a black jew phase

 

[Premeer]

life is like a bucket of wood shavings, except when those shavings are in a pail, then it's like a pail of wood shavings

-spongebob

 

[BiblicalAtheist]

Two monks were making a pilgrimage to venerate the relics of a great Saint. During the course of their journey, they came to a river where they met a beautiful young woman -- an apparently worldly creature, dressed in expensive finery and with her hair done up in the latest fashion. She was afraid of the current and afraid of ruining her lovely clothing, so asked the brothers if they might carry her across the river.

The younger and more exacting of the brothers was offended at the very idea and turned away with an attitude of disgust. The older brother didn't hesitate, and quickly picked the woman up on his shoulders, carried her across the river, and set her down on the other side. She thanked him and went on her way, and the brother waded back through the waters.

The monks resumed their walk, the older one in perfect equanimity and enjoying the beautiful countryside, while the younger one grew more and more brooding and distracted, so much so that he could keep his silence no longer and suddenly burst out, "Brother, we are taught to avoid contact with women, and there you were, not just touching a woman, but carrying her on your shoulders!"

The older monk looked at the younger with a loving, pitiful smile and said, "Brother, I set her down on the other side of the river; you are still carrying her."

 

[movingfeet]

I rather do business with a smart thief than a honest man who is stupid. A stupid man is dangerous like a defective timebomb you never know when it's gonna go off but a thief you can control what he steals.

A man once told me with dealing with grimy niggas remember this "trust equals opportunity" so never trust grimy niggas cause they will see your trust to get what they want and fuck you in the process.

 

[Splackavelli]

@Plap Star is that eli porter twin sister? lmao ok enough now more words of wisdom: laugh and the world laughs with you cry and i'll give you something to cry about you little pansy ~words of wisdom by adam sandler ~(paraphrasing his father)

 

[ohhhla]

"I ain't the smartest muthafucka walkin/ But I tell a fake nigga when he talkin."

 

[VIBE]

"Don't google 'blue waffle'"

 

[SOWETO]

"you think i don't carry a motherfuckin' pistol, nigga? 'cause i'm a crackhead? nigga, i got a motherfuckin' nickel-plated .380, i'll go to my old lady house, i'll tell her, 'SUSIE, THROW IT OUT THE WINDOW! SUE-ZAY!'"

 

[aneed123]

"however u start off treating a woman when u first start dating is what they gonna expect leave something to be earned."

"Give me my flowers while Im alive"

"same folk bringing u flowers to ur funeral wont give u soup when ur sick"

 

[7figz]

Why not ?

 

"The moment you settle for less than you deserve, you get less than you settled for."

 

"The more you let go of people and things, the fewer obstacles you will have on your life's journey."

 

"Life is a journey, not a destination."