What Affects A Person More Growing Up?

[blacktux]

And dont ever let someones misery make you feel that you need to sink to their level for the sake of empathy.

Law 10: INFECTION; AVOID THE UNHAPPY AND UNLUCKY.

 

[Go figure]

Shit i remember in high school had friends who never knew their father. Could never vent about problems i had at home to them bc of the same shit.

"At least u have both parents"

"U dont know how easy u got it u sound spoiled, etc"

That'd be like me comin at them when they have problems sayin "at least u have your mother some ppl have no parents at all"

Plus i known some ppl to have both parents and a woat upbringing that scarred them for life.

And ppl in single parent homes that do well for themselves.

Its all some bitter shit if theyre ur true friends they'd handle that differently

 

[King Ghidorah]

Bills

 

[luke1733]

I grew up with that same problem. I couldn't even bring people to my parent's house because it almost always ended up in them changing their opinion about me and us eventually fighting over them then starting to say shit they never said before like "soft," or "you wouldn't know cause you're rich." As long as I didn't show them my parent's house this never came up.

Overall to answer your question I think parents and environment are equal. Some people will be who they are no matter what environment they are in or who their parents are OTHERS or the other 99% need a situation to be normalized; meaning you act or see things a certain way because you are influenced to believe it is the social norm and you achieve certain things because you don't want to be below the social means of what is considered acceptable. In other words to some extent everyone wants to enjoy life without being constantly looked at by all they know as a lame or loser or weirdo.

After saying all that I have to add something that I saw or at least hit me later in life that was very peculiar. It was the fact that many times it doesn't matter who you really are as much as how society has taught people to react and respond to people that resemble you. Resemblance/lookism can goes as far as you being talkative and funny but bc this society sees (let me just exaggerate to make a point) people with 13 fingers as not funny, not attractive, then people will give you certain looks, call you names, talk about you behind your back, possibly not hire you, not date you (or severely limit your dating options) and a host of other behaviors that the world will force upon you AND then BLAME you because you have to react to their abnormal condescending behavior in a way that any normal person/such as your 13 finger-self would. That's the irony/hypocrisy of the world. Who it lets be is something very peculiar to me. The funny thing too is how so few people see that as a reality although it is plain to see.

Of course certain qualities circumvent biases, but that is not to be confused with actually changing those biases.

When you live in different cultures this point I'm making is magnified very quickly: what is cool over here ain't cool over there. Some people who are talkative here are considered rude, annoying and ignorant there. Some people who have weight issues here are acceptable and considered attractive but over there they are considered morbidly obese and disgusting. Some societies value humor others value wisdom and serious thoughtful responses.



How people Interpret what is acceptable concerning Ego's versus characteristics is what I am talking about.

 

[LUClEN]

Me and my homie was having a debate. Well not a debate really but he was kind of jokin/serious i think. Anyway he made some commits about how i had ot easier growing up because i had both parents in my life and he only had one. Then he went on to say im rich cuz i live in a bigger house. An cuz my family got alittle money.......i felt offended cuz i never act like i got money nor do i hold it over anyone's head. Plus its not my money its my parents money. Ya i got a allowance growing up and got most of the shit i wanted during Christmas but how is that my fault. Cause when i reached a certain age i did have to go get a job and work for shit just like everyone else. All im sayin is nobody picks what there born into or who there born to. I just feel like instead of making statements towards me he needs to ask his mom why she made the poor choices she made to put him in the position he's in growing up. ik people with more money than me and both parents and 1 parent who have there head stuck up there ass. An ik people with both parents and 1 parent who grew up struggling that also have there head stuck up there asses. I've seen people from good homes and wealth and people from bad homes and no wealth both blow and take the opportunities that where laid in front of them.

Im just wondering in your opinion what really makes a person the way they are "parenting, money, environment...etc" i mean sure they can influence your choices but its still up to your mind to make choices in life.

It's both. I'm watching this play out in my life right now.

Spoiler

My parents split when I was young. Had shared custody at times, then my mum moved across the country and I didn't see her often as i lived with my dad. He was not the person who should have been raising me: drugs, criminal past, poor education, constant financial struggles, and I was in trouble w/ the law a lot. After HS i got a job offer w/ my step father doing construction. He had a more typical upbringing, both parents, etc. I took my ass to school, even though I had struggle grades in everything except music and English in HS, and i'm killing it rn @ a really high-ranking university. This all came due to my family here being more stable and better, off. Even though they never paid for my schooling, being able to get the job from my fam enabled me to pay for my undergrad without loans. My entire quality of life went up, and that's important as I noticed something: our lives kind of build momentum. If things go bad they tend to go bad for awhile. When it rains it pours. But when you're up you tend to be on a streak for a bit. It's easier to make good moves after making a series of good moves, and it's easier to get to a better position when you're already in a good one. The education and upbringing you have may give you the tools to climb, but if you're not in a good spot to make that move then the tools aren't very useful.

 

[Fosheezy]

Growing up without pops is tough. And growin up trying to make a Dad out of another man that don't really owe you that is tough too.

 

[CeLLaR-DooR]

I don't understand when people get offended after bein' told they have money. I've noticed that a lot, especially recent now I work with a buncha public school boys. They really don't like any comments (commits lol) about it and when someone does mention school or home life, they're quick to talk about the stuff they didn't get.

I wish my parents had money when I was growin' up I'd be damn happy about it.

 

[TayGettem]

I don't understand when people get offended after bein' told they have money. I've noticed that a lot, especially recent now I work with a buncha public school boys. They really don't like any comments (commits lol) about it and when someone does mention school or home life, they're quick to talk about the stuff they didn't get.

I wish my parents had money when I was growin' up I'd be damn happy about it.

I get annoyed by it cuz they assume jst cause my house is alittle big im rich. Which isn't the case theres a difference between working hard, saving and investing in something. An being born from a family with money. Mine isn't the latter. My parents just went from living in the city (N.Y) where we would be considered poor do to the higher cost of living. To living in the counrty (G.A) where the cost of living is cheaper so we could afford more. But I've still done my homework in the dark cause our lights got turned off etc.......its the assuming that bothers me cuz people usually guess wrong and i don't waste time playing the "Who's life was worse" game

 

[R0mp]

I don't understand when people get offended after bein' told they have money. I've noticed that a lot, especially recent now I work with a buncha public school boys. They really don't like any comments (commits lol) about it and when someone does mention school or home life, they're quick to talk about the stuff they didn't get.

I wish my parents had money when I was growin' up I'd be damn happy about it.

Most people will bristle up if they feel it's insinuated they were spoonfed and handed everything they have.

 

[CeLLaR-DooR]

I don't understand when people get offended after bein' told they have money. I've noticed that a lot, especially recent now I work with a buncha public school boys. They really don't like any comments (commits lol) about it and when someone does mention school or home life, they're quick to talk about the stuff they didn't get.

I wish my parents had money when I was growin' up I'd be damn happy about it.

I get annoyed by it cuz they assume jst cause my house is alittle big im rich. Which isn't the case theres a difference between working hard, saving and investing in something. An being born from a family with money. Mine isn't the latter. My parents just went from living in the city (N.Y) where we would be considered poor do to the higher cost of living. To living in the counrty (G.A) where the cost of living is cheaper so we could afford more. But I've still done my homework in the dark cause our lights got turned off etc.......its the assuming that bothers me cuz people usually guess wrong and i don't waste time playing the "Who's life was worse" game

I don't understand when people get offended after bein' told they have money. I've noticed that a lot, especially recent now I work with a buncha public school boys. They really don't like any comments (commits lol) about it and when someone does mention school or home life, they're quick to talk about the stuff they didn't get.

I wish my parents had money when I was growin' up I'd be damn happy about it.

Most people will bristle up if they feel it's insinuated they were spoonfed and handed everything they have.

You ain't lyin'