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Damn I forgot about this story. I wa in college and met this chick off fb. Her back story is she used to be in slow classes in high school and she kinda had a slight limp but she was normal looking and she had a big ass butt. Well anyway I didn't find all this out til after we already having sex. I mentioned her name to one of my homeboys and that nigga instantly said " nigga you fucking limp leg Delvina??? Bwahahahaha" I wanted to punch him so bad cause he wouldn't stop laughing. So anyway I told that nigga don't tell nobody plus she got a big ass so its gonna be a summer fling and I'll drop her when fall semester stop. Chick used to say we should go out to eat or movies and I would laugh and change subjects lol. Long story short she tried to sneak a baby on me when we stopped talking but she claims she lost the baby smh I think she was lying but I dodged a massive L and took an L at the same time
alliknowishate
New member
well it was my high school sweet heart (hold up while i pour me some buffalo trace cause shit gets deeper) so she gets pregnant and im like worried cause im young and shit but we get on a rough patch cause i think her moms put her up to it. anyway she has this "best friend" who is a dude and her mother really likes. i didnt care about that nigga i just knew i was trying to get that old flame back with my girl cause i was head over heels in love with her and peeped the signs but i didnt want to believe. but i digress.
so it was the day she was suppose to go see the doctor for a check up and i get to the hospital and guess who i see walking around the hospital.....him. so we give each other the eye like fuck you. i goes to where shes at and she didnt even know he was there....or has gotten there yet, idk. so me being a dummy i tell her he's down there(yes L's upon L's) she goes down there gets him and sits with this nigga. im like wtf. so she eventually comes back we sit she goes gets the check up and we leave. now this nigga aint got no car and she was like can he ride with us back to my crib. me being the dumb still in love with a fuckin bitch i did this shit. gets back to her crib they both get out and im like can i come in? she says naw you know my momma dont like and plus were just going to study. hahahahaha. i peeled off mad than a muthafucka. theirs more but fuck that im mad. lets just say.......
so it was the day she was suppose to go see the doctor for a check up and i get to the hospital and guess who i see walking around the hospital.....him. so we give each other the eye like fuck you. i goes to where shes at and she didnt even know he was there....or has gotten there yet, idk. so me being a dummy i tell her he's down there(yes L's upon L's) she goes down there gets him and sits with this nigga. im like wtf. so she eventually comes back we sit she goes gets the check up and we leave. now this nigga aint got no car and she was like can he ride with us back to my crib. me being the dumb still in love with a fuckin bitch i did this shit. gets back to her crib they both get out and im like can i come in? she says naw you know my momma dont like and plus were just going to study. hahahahaha. i peeled off mad than a muthafucka. theirs more but fuck that im mad. lets just say.......
Recaptimus_Prime360
New member
Dammit. I'm angry as hell now after reading that.
SolemnSauce
New member
Lawd
dalyricalbandit
Moderator
alliknowishate;8188667 said:
damn that shit even got me mad and shit aint even got shit to do with me
Idiopathic Joker
Moderator
Ok, my story don't seem so bad now
aight fellas...this aint really a "scumbag" type of story, but still pretty funny
so...ya'll remember the party where i told ya'll about how I told some chick from high school that me and @knock_twice was about to fly out to shoot a commercial for Colgate or some shit
so at that same party, our homie JL was with us too (i've told ya'll about JL and his white jeans wearing brother)
So almost right after i told the chick the lie about the Colgate commercial, JL is laughing his ass off and was like "man, i'ma tell a chick something like that too"
So a bunch of people from our old high school were at this party. As a matter of fact, it was the same day that LSU lost to Alabama in Alabama when Jamarcus Russell was the QB. I only remember that b/c this nigga showed up to the party and was wearing this peach colored "choppa suit". I kept thinking, "this nigga just lost a big game and out here like nothing happened"..but anyways
So we was just walking around and ran into some old HS classmates and a few of them had pooled their money together to buy a bottle of Moet. So they over there just stunting with the bottle and glasses. I later learned that the bottle was empty the whole time, so I'm not sure they even paid for it. So they got tired of holding it and JL gets the bright idea to start holding it and takes a glass.
We walking around the party while he holding this got damn empty bottle of Moet, and they got this lil circle of chicks standing around doin they lil two step or whatever. So JL walks up to one of them and the convo goes like this:
JL: hey, how you doing...you wanna dance?
chick: ~no response
JL: AP, you see that?
AP: She probably didnt hear you brah, ask her again
JL: HEY!! HOW YOU DOING!!!!
girl: Hi, im fine
JL: YOU WANNA DANCE??
girl: Nah, im alright, im'a just stand here and hang with my girls
JL: ~with a perplexed look on his face, looks back at AP and KT
AP and KT: ~in unison, shrugs~
JL: ~to the girl~. FUCK YOU BITCH...THATS WHY I PLAY FOR THE CELTICS
~reaches in pocket and grabs the most crumbled looking dollars in history and throws them at the girl, then proceeds to walk clean the fuck off
ahhh...good times
so...ya'll remember the party where i told ya'll about how I told some chick from high school that me and @knock_twice was about to fly out to shoot a commercial for Colgate or some shit
so at that same party, our homie JL was with us too (i've told ya'll about JL and his white jeans wearing brother)
So almost right after i told the chick the lie about the Colgate commercial, JL is laughing his ass off and was like "man, i'ma tell a chick something like that too"
So a bunch of people from our old high school were at this party. As a matter of fact, it was the same day that LSU lost to Alabama in Alabama when Jamarcus Russell was the QB. I only remember that b/c this nigga showed up to the party and was wearing this peach colored "choppa suit". I kept thinking, "this nigga just lost a big game and out here like nothing happened"..but anyways
So we was just walking around and ran into some old HS classmates and a few of them had pooled their money together to buy a bottle of Moet. So they over there just stunting with the bottle and glasses. I later learned that the bottle was empty the whole time, so I'm not sure they even paid for it. So they got tired of holding it and JL gets the bright idea to start holding it and takes a glass.
We walking around the party while he holding this got damn empty bottle of Moet, and they got this lil circle of chicks standing around doin they lil two step or whatever. So JL walks up to one of them and the convo goes like this:
JL: hey, how you doing...you wanna dance?
chick: ~no response
JL: AP, you see that?
AP: She probably didnt hear you brah, ask her again
JL: HEY!! HOW YOU DOING!!!!
girl: Hi, im fine
JL: YOU WANNA DANCE??
girl: Nah, im alright, im'a just stand here and hang with my girls
JL: ~with a perplexed look on his face, looks back at AP and KT
AP and KT: ~in unison, shrugs~
JL: ~to the girl~. FUCK YOU BITCH...THATS WHY I PLAY FOR THE CELTICS
~reaches in pocket and grabs the most crumbled looking dollars in history and throws them at the girl, then proceeds to walk clean the fuck off
ahhh...good times
illestni99ainne
New member
To I just busted out laughing at my job laughing at this. Getting crazy looks
Knock_Twice
New member
illestni99ainne;8190354 said:
I'm in tears...the ap dude walked over and picked up the crumbled up dollars then put them in shits his pockets and walked off Lol while them bitches watched him..with the what in the hell just happened here face Lol
Tears and sniffs
one night i was at the club this big tittied chick was coming at me tough, I convinced her to let me go home with her
She had a friend with her, kinda on the chubby side, so I needed a wing man so she wouldn't block. I convinced my bro to take one for the team, well really wasn't any convincing because that nigga will eat anything
Fast forward, we back at her spot, she sitting on my lap playing in my ear, I finished the soda she gave me so I sat the empty can on the end table
I whisper in her ear "let's leave them in here and me and you go to your room", then that is when the truth comes out, she says "ok, but throw out your can and make sure you put it in the recycle bin", i jokingly said "oh you a green hoe" she laughed and said "no, my man collects cans, & he'll know someone has been here if you put it in the garbage can", i asked her what man? She said hers, and says that he is at work third shift so we gotta be gone be 4am
I was thinking like, this a dirty bitch, what if the nigga came home early and caught us here, he could snap and shoot all of us, so I planned in head that i was gonna fix this hoe
I fuck the shit outta her, she came so hard she feel alseep, i went to sleep also, bitch jumps up at like 5 and was like "omg y'all gotta go" she says let y'all selves out and her friend would lock the door behind us, im like okay, and grabbed the nut filled condom off the night stand
I took the nut filled condom and placed in the recycle bin sandwiched between some cans so that when her nigga sorted the cans out of the bin he would find it
Ol punk bitch, that was for not telling me she lived with a nigga before inviting me over, should've let me decide if I wanted to potentially put myself in harm's way
She had a friend with her, kinda on the chubby side, so I needed a wing man so she wouldn't block. I convinced my bro to take one for the team, well really wasn't any convincing because that nigga will eat anything
Fast forward, we back at her spot, she sitting on my lap playing in my ear, I finished the soda she gave me so I sat the empty can on the end table
I whisper in her ear "let's leave them in here and me and you go to your room", then that is when the truth comes out, she says "ok, but throw out your can and make sure you put it in the recycle bin", i jokingly said "oh you a green hoe" she laughed and said "no, my man collects cans, & he'll know someone has been here if you put it in the garbage can", i asked her what man? She said hers, and says that he is at work third shift so we gotta be gone be 4am
I was thinking like, this a dirty bitch, what if the nigga came home early and caught us here, he could snap and shoot all of us, so I planned in head that i was gonna fix this hoe
I fuck the shit outta her, she came so hard she feel alseep, i went to sleep also, bitch jumps up at like 5 and was like "omg y'all gotta go" she says let y'all selves out and her friend would lock the door behind us, im like okay, and grabbed the nut filled condom off the night stand
I took the nut filled condom and placed in the recycle bin sandwiched between some cans so that when her nigga sorted the cans out of the bin he would find it
Ol punk bitch, that was for not telling me she lived with a nigga before inviting me over, should've let me decide if I wanted to potentially put myself in harm's way
Maaan that lost story reminds me of another one.
Nh in advance.
I aint the one that scumbagged in this one, but i was forced to play a part in it. Long story short, i was a senior in highschool and was at the mall with a friend, we scoping bitches. He sees one and hes like yo look at her. She was fine as fuck. My boy was struck and stuck. I was like yo go holla at her. He on some idk man she looks too good. So we following her, ass is fat. She stops to get a drink at starbucks. Im like yo go talk to her.
So, this mafucka, and, again nh, tells me yo ima talk to her but i need you to go stand behind her. Im like yo wtf? Hes like just do it. Im like whatever man. I go and stand behind her on line.
Dude goes around and he comes right up in front her, looks at her, and says something like "hey i been watching you and i think your really cute you wanna drink a cup of coffee here?" she denys him and says something like "im sorry i dont have time" or whatever
And this mafucka, nh for the last time, tells her like what bitch? I wasnt talking to you i was talking to him and points at me. She turns looks at me and im biting my tongue trying not to laugh. She turns back quick and says oh im so sorry. I shake my head telling him no and hes oh ok and walks the fuck out.
So im in starbucks stuck behind this bitch on the line bout to explode with laughter, biting my tongue, i remember my chest was hurting from trying to supress the laughter, she embarrassed as hell and looking down. Her turn comes she orders and quick as hell walks out, at that point im forced to buy something. I got like a coffee or something walked out and soon as i turn the corner i see my boy and burst out laughing loud as shit. He sees me and starts laughing. I look across and see her walking she just gave me the finger and kept walking looking mad as hell.
I aint even do nothing!
Nh in advance.
I aint the one that scumbagged in this one, but i was forced to play a part in it. Long story short, i was a senior in highschool and was at the mall with a friend, we scoping bitches. He sees one and hes like yo look at her. She was fine as fuck. My boy was struck and stuck. I was like yo go holla at her. He on some idk man she looks too good. So we following her, ass is fat. She stops to get a drink at starbucks. Im like yo go talk to her.
So, this mafucka, and, again nh, tells me yo ima talk to her but i need you to go stand behind her. Im like yo wtf? Hes like just do it. Im like whatever man. I go and stand behind her on line.
Dude goes around and he comes right up in front her, looks at her, and says something like "hey i been watching you and i think your really cute you wanna drink a cup of coffee here?" she denys him and says something like "im sorry i dont have time" or whatever
And this mafucka, nh for the last time, tells her like what bitch? I wasnt talking to you i was talking to him and points at me. She turns looks at me and im biting my tongue trying not to laugh. She turns back quick and says oh im so sorry. I shake my head telling him no and hes oh ok and walks the fuck out.
So im in starbucks stuck behind this bitch on the line bout to explode with laughter, biting my tongue, i remember my chest was hurting from trying to supress the laughter, she embarrassed as hell and looking down. Her turn comes she orders and quick as hell walks out, at that point im forced to buy something. I got like a coffee or something walked out and soon as i turn the corner i see my boy and burst out laughing loud as shit. He sees me and starts laughing. I look across and see her walking she just gave me the finger and kept walking looking mad as hell.
I aint even do nothing!
Recaptimus_Prime360
New member
AZTG;8190430 said:
I was about to drop that Cam'Ron bottle gif, but the s@@@ was funny. Her damn pride crumbled to dust. Lol
bruh, i know i told this on the IC before, but i can't remember what thread.. but this shit was hilarifuckinglous....
so there was this dark skinned african girl at my highschool with some big ass titty's....she had like 4 siblings, and her older brother was in my grade...and we were legit cool.....he was the homey, but his little sister was holding.....i was cool with her, but never really tried to holla, but one day i was telling my cousin about her when the conversation of titties came up..she was mad small framed with these huge ass tits that were just perky as fuck....so of course he wanted to meet her....
they met, and he got the number.....my nigga.....
so over the winter break i'm over his house we playin mortal kombat, and the chick call him on his room phone...they talking and she like we should come over...her brother and her father aren't home...we could stop through for a bit...he like bet, and i'm like fuck it whatever...
so we go over the house, and ofcourse she braiding a chicks hair, cuz that's what africans do....i met another one of their little sisters...and i was like.. bruh, these chicks must have it in the genetics, cuz she was like a year or two younger and her titties were big as hell too, she was like she's coming to our highschool next year, so me and her got to talking (i was only in the 10th grade at the time) while my cousin and the main sister go in the basement.....they smashed for like 20 mins or so, and he come back up stairs with her.... nigga giving me all the low key signs that the tits was magnificent...and i'm just happy as shit for him...trying to throw a little game at the other sister...fuck i had no shame, she was only 2 years younger.....when all of a sudden we heard the front door opening....
me and this nigga looked at eachother...and fucking broke.....i stepped on the glass coffe table that shit shattered...this nigga knocked over a big ass flower pot, i tipped over a table, and we broke for the back door.....
we jumped off the deck, cleared the fence and shot down a alley.....we heard her father and brother chasing us and knew them africans were fast, so we cutting through yards, cutting down streets everything to get away....
we couldn't hop in a cab cuz her father drove a cab, and her brother was riding with him that day, so we were shook to hail one down, assuming they were looking for us in the cab........so we saw the bus coming...hid in the bushes and soon as it stopped we jetted to the bus and got on.....
safe.....
now i'm like shit....i know her brother saw my coat, and it was a brand new coat for xmas...my cousin was like... you just can't wear that shit to school...
so i'm back at school the next week with my old ass coat on and i see her in the hallway....she walks up to me like
"yo i fucking hate yall...did yall ahve to break everything"
i'm like "nigga i'm just glad we got away, did your brother know it was me??"
she was like he didn't and then her face drpped cuz this nigga walked straight up to me like
"man don't talk to this disgrace....she tell you what happened??"
i'm like naw whassup??
"she shamed our family....she had some niggaz in our home while me and my father were out working.....these niggaz they have no respect for anything, they just come in, treat my sisters like whores, destroy our house, they run like cowards, and on top of it all she shows them loyalty by not telling me who they were.....this is not someone you call a friend"
i look her with disgust and shock like
"forreal yo??? you do your family like that???? what kinds of shit is that?? how you live with yourself yo???"
maaaaaaaannnnnnn if looks could kill.....
so there was this dark skinned african girl at my highschool with some big ass titty's....she had like 4 siblings, and her older brother was in my grade...and we were legit cool.....he was the homey, but his little sister was holding.....i was cool with her, but never really tried to holla, but one day i was telling my cousin about her when the conversation of titties came up..she was mad small framed with these huge ass tits that were just perky as fuck....so of course he wanted to meet her....
they met, and he got the number.....my nigga.....
so over the winter break i'm over his house we playin mortal kombat, and the chick call him on his room phone...they talking and she like we should come over...her brother and her father aren't home...we could stop through for a bit...he like bet, and i'm like fuck it whatever...
so we go over the house, and ofcourse she braiding a chicks hair, cuz that's what africans do....i met another one of their little sisters...and i was like.. bruh, these chicks must have it in the genetics, cuz she was like a year or two younger and her titties were big as hell too, she was like she's coming to our highschool next year, so me and her got to talking (i was only in the 10th grade at the time) while my cousin and the main sister go in the basement.....they smashed for like 20 mins or so, and he come back up stairs with her.... nigga giving me all the low key signs that the tits was magnificent...and i'm just happy as shit for him...trying to throw a little game at the other sister...fuck i had no shame, she was only 2 years younger.....when all of a sudden we heard the front door opening....
me and this nigga looked at eachother...and fucking broke.....i stepped on the glass coffe table that shit shattered...this nigga knocked over a big ass flower pot, i tipped over a table, and we broke for the back door.....
we jumped off the deck, cleared the fence and shot down a alley.....we heard her father and brother chasing us and knew them africans were fast, so we cutting through yards, cutting down streets everything to get away....
we couldn't hop in a cab cuz her father drove a cab, and her brother was riding with him that day, so we were shook to hail one down, assuming they were looking for us in the cab........so we saw the bus coming...hid in the bushes and soon as it stopped we jetted to the bus and got on.....
safe.....
now i'm like shit....i know her brother saw my coat, and it was a brand new coat for xmas...my cousin was like... you just can't wear that shit to school...
so i'm back at school the next week with my old ass coat on and i see her in the hallway....she walks up to me like
"yo i fucking hate yall...did yall ahve to break everything"
i'm like "nigga i'm just glad we got away, did your brother know it was me??"
she was like he didn't and then her face drpped cuz this nigga walked straight up to me like
"man don't talk to this disgrace....she tell you what happened??"
i'm like naw whassup??
"she shamed our family....she had some niggaz in our home while me and my father were out working.....these niggaz they have no respect for anything, they just come in, treat my sisters like whores, destroy our house, they run like cowards, and on top of it all she shows them loyalty by not telling me who they were.....this is not someone you call a friend"
i look her with disgust and shock like
"forreal yo??? you do your family like that???? what kinds of shit is that?? how you live with yourself yo???"
maaaaaaaannnnnnn if looks could kill.....
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