On the Run from Child Support

[The Jackal]

Cs is probably one of the biggest scams this century

 

[gorilla]

do you have or have you filed for joint custody yet???

i see what marley is saying ... and in alot of cases that is true. but i think what you may not understand is that the courts dont actually favor "women" per say. the courts favor the custodial parent. and if a child is born out of wedlock then the mother is granted the custodial rights automatically. if you were at your childs birth, the nurse should have gave you the opportunity to sign an acknowledgement of paternity form that is filed with the birth certificate of the child. now of course it is a thin line signing that paper because if it turns out that the child is not yours, the document is still legally binding. but you are granted the option of withholding on signing it until paternity tests come back ... and of course you can arrange a paternity test when your child is born too .... the acknowledgement of paternity gives you equal custodial rights.

too bad they dont teach shit like this in sex - ed at school

but at the end of the day cuzzin you gotta file for joint custody the moment you know that she took you for child support ... you waited it out and now your fighting from behind. dont let it frustrate you cuzzo .. i know its hard as hell for you my dude ... but you are no where near out of the picture my dude ... ive seen way worse cases than yours .. you'll be straight ... just make sure you play your seed close that way you can cover those bases that she missed and strenghthen your side of the "battle"

Some background info:

We were married. I filed for divorce, in the divorce I asked for joint legal and joint physical custody with the intention of having the kids split their time between the two of us as close down the middle as possible. We mapped out a schedule. She tried to come up with every kind of excuse/activity to limit and reduce my time with them, but I fought that and agreed to take them to a reasonable amount of activities during my time with them. Meaning I wasn't going to just let her start signing them up for all kind of shit and be running around the city dropping them off here and there instead of spending time with them.

I have our judgement of divorce which states that we share joint physical/legal custody. I have the order signed with mapped out schedules. She started picking up the kids from school early so that by the time I got there (and yes I mean at least 15 mins or so before the last bell I would always be there) they'd already be gone. I went to the police, showed them the divorce judgement and schedule and argued that could be considered as parental kidnapping. They sent a squad car to her house, she refused to let the kids come out and they said they couldn't do anything else and I'd have to take her to court. We go to court, I take a letter signed by the main office on school letterhead that specifically stated the time I arrived and the fact that the kids had been picked up early from school by her. Judge tell her not to do it again, blah blah blah. We leave court and the same shit happens. This pattern continues, I hire another attorney, we go back to court they send us to mediation. More blah blah blah, we leave court with a new agreement, she does the same shit. File another complaint, hear nothing. I go up to friend of the court, they "tried contacting her but haven't heard anything". I file another complaint, wait, nothing gets done. I go back to friend of the court, ask to speak to our "family counselor" directly, she even admits this is getting out of hand. She finally files a show cause hearing. At the show cause hearing, the bitch serves me with the PPO, and then they adjourn the show cause hearing because of the PPO which I go to court next month to fight.

That's the tip of the iceberg, this shit been going on since I divorced her ass in 08. I got a file case full of all kinds of court shit on her and they won't budge. Let me miss 1 child support payment though, and all she has to do is call the warrant dept. at the county sheriffs.

 

[gorilla]

I have to agree with the highlighted.
One day, the tables will most likely turn. That child may very well end up resenting their mother and often times, if you make it happen, the bond between father and child will surpass any lost time.
Also, there are ways to build up a case which can at least ensure a more substantial case on your end. I don't know the back story so I cannot help, that would be too general.

Oh no doubt, I keep going because I do it for them. The one thing that makes me go damn near insane sometimes is the fact I feel like my kids have been kidnapped.

Imagine someone coming into your home, taking your kids from you, demanding ransom, and all of their action being allowed to continue by the government.

That's exactly what it feels like. I moved close to my kids schools and into a bigger place so that I could provide a better home for them. They live 10 minutes down the road from me, ten minutes, yet I am legally restrained from going anywhere near them. Oh and I just missed two birthdays too. Yeah people talk about lost time, but you can't make up for that. Once time is gone its gone, you can't get another first birthday, baby's first steps etc.

And that ain't directed at anybody here, it relates to a judge who sat there while I ran up and down a whole list pleading with him to do something and he told me "You'll have the next 50 years to spend with your daughter".

As if to say "it's really not this serious". Talk about making my soul burn slow................

 

[Conscious__Nkechi]

Some background info:

We were married. I filed for divorce, in the divorce I asked for joint legal and joint physical custody with the intention of having the kids split their time between the two of us as close down the middle as possible. We mapped out a schedule. She tried to come up with every kind of excuse/activity to limit and reduce my time with them, but I fought that and agreed to take them to a reasonable amount of activities during my time with them. Meaning I wasn't going to just let her start signing them up for all kind of shit and be running around the city dropping them off here and there instead of spending time with them.

I have our judgement of divorce which states that we share joint physical/legal custody. I have the order signed with mapped out schedules. She started picking up the kids from school early so that by the time I got there (and yes I mean at least 15 mins or so before the last bell I would always be there) they'd already be gone. I went to the police, showed them the divorce judgement and schedule and argued that could be considered as parental kidnapping. They sent a squad car to her house, she refused to let the kids come out and they said they couldn't do anything else and I'd have to take her to court. We go to court, I take a letter signed by the main office on school letterhead that specifically stated the time I arrived and the fact that the kids had been picked up early from school by her. Judge tell her not to do it again, blah blah blah. We leave court and the same shit happens. This pattern continues, I hire another attorney, we go back to court they send us to mediation. More blah blah blah, we leave court with a new agreement, she does the same shit. File another complaint, hear nothing. I go up to friend of the court, they "tried contacting her but haven't heard anything". I file another complaint, wait, nothing gets done. I go back to friend of the court, ask to speak to our "family counselor" directly, she even admits this is getting out of hand. She finally files a show cause hearing. At the show cause hearing, the bitch serves me with the PPO, and then they adjourn the show cause hearing because of the PPO which I go to court next month to fight.

That's the tip of the iceberg, this shit been going on since I divorced her ass in 08. I got a file case full of all kinds of court shit on her and they won't budge. Let me miss 1 child support payment though, and all she has to do is call the warrant dept. at the county sheriffs.

They sent you for mediation after all that?
That is the dumbest thing I have ever heard.......today.
The system has no damn sense. Why after all that would they believe that mediation would resolve things? (Rhetorical)

I am only trying to get all sides of the story because I know realistically, things can be different from what they seem.
I know of situations which sound identical in certain ways but the individual actually only relays THEIR truth to make it seem like the other party is the one in the wrong.
Not applying this to you or anyone here, I just usually don't judge, especially based on one side of the story. I say this as a mother herself who overstands each side.

I feel for the battle you have to fight and all for something you shouldn't have to, the right to your children.

 

[rakim ii]

Some background info:

We were married. I filed for divorce, in the divorce I asked for joint legal and joint physical custody with the intention of having the kids split their time between the two of us as close down the middle as possible. We mapped out a schedule. She tried to come up with every kind of excuse/activity to limit and reduce my time with them, but I fought that and agreed to take them to a reasonable amount of activities during my time with them. Meaning I wasn't going to just let her start signing them up for all kind of shit and be running around the city dropping them off here and there instead of spending time with them.

I have our judgement of divorce which states that we share joint physical/legal custody. I have the order signed with mapped out schedules. She started picking up the kids from school early so that by the time I got there (and yes I mean at least 15 mins or so before the last bell I would always be there) they'd already be gone. I went to the police, showed them the divorce judgement and schedule and argued that could be considered as parental kidnapping. They sent a squad car to her house, she refused to let the kids come out and they said they couldn't do anything else and I'd have to take her to court. We go to court, I take a letter signed by the main office on school letterhead that specifically stated the time I arrived and the fact that the kids had been picked up early from school by her. Judge tell her not to do it again, blah blah blah. We leave court and the same shit happens. This pattern continues, I hire another attorney, we go back to court they send us to mediation. More blah blah blah, we leave court with a new agreement, she does the same shit. File another complaint, hear nothing. I go up to friend of the court, they "tried contacting her but haven't heard anything". I file another complaint, wait, nothing gets done. I go back to friend of the court, ask to speak to our "family counselor" directly, she even admits this is getting out of hand. She finally files a show cause hearing. At the show cause hearing, the bitch serves me with the PPO, and then they adjourn the show cause hearing because of the PPO which I go to court next month to fight.

That's the tip of the iceberg, this shit been going on since I divorced her ass in 08. I got a file case full of all kinds of court shit on her and they won't budge. Let me miss 1 child support payment though, and all she has to do is call the warrant dept. at the county sheriffs.

Wow the system is so flawed. I'm going thru alot of the same shit with the mother of my child. Bitch can't get over the fact that I don't want to have anything to do with her and the first thing she does is run to the court with some bs and they side with her. Sometimes it feel like l'm fighting a losing battle. The judge is so biased.

 

[gorilla]

They sent you for mediation after all that?
That is the dumbest thing I have ever heard.......today.
The system has no damn sense. Why after all that would they believe that mediation would resolve things? (Rhetorical)

Yup! And to make it worse you can't refuse because then you look like the non cooperative party.

Honestly, this is really truly about a financial interest the government has in this whole thing. You hear people say c support is a scam -and it is. It's big business. I've spend countless hours researching this whole setup and it all goes back to money that it generates.

Hell I forgot that with the service fee, administrative fee, there another $25 dollar fee that I know is affect at least in MI that the non custodial parent has to pay. But wait a minute, although I pay child support, my divorce judgment granted me shared LEGAL AND PHYSICAL custody, so how am I non custodial?

 

[Conscious__Nkechi]

Oh no doubt, I keep going because I do it for them. The one thing that makes me go damn near insane sometimes is the fact I feel like my kids have been kidnapped.

Imagine someone coming into your home, taking your kids from you, demanding ransom, and all of their action being allowed to continue by the government.

That's exactly what it feels like. I moved close to my kids schools and into a bigger place so that I could provide a better home for them. They live 10 minutes down the road from me, ten minutes, yet I am legally restrained from going anywhere near them. Oh and I just missed two birthdays too. Yeah people talk about lost time, but you can't make up for that. Once time is gone its gone, you can't get another first birthday, baby's first steps etc.

And that ain't directed at anybody here, it relates to a judge who sat there while I ran up and down a whole list pleading with him to do something and he told me "You'll have the next 50 years to spend with your daughter".

As if to say "it's really not this serious". Talk about making my soul burn slow................

I completely agree.
The most important years of a child's life is between the ages of 0-9. It is then broken down into 3 parts: 0-3, 3-6, 6-9.
A child's personality develops over this time and sticks with them for life. So much of them begins before the age of 9 and you are missing out on it, it's heartbreaking.

I am disgusted at that judges comment but not at all surprised. That doesn't mean it's acceptable or okay.
I wonder how he'd react if someone were to tell him "Suck it up, you can be with your children when they grow up."
He's like saying "Buck up soldier, you have a shot in hell but it's only your kids, not that important."

 

[gorilla]

Wow the system is so flawed. I'm going thru alot of the same shit with the mother of my child. Bitch can't get over the fact that I don't want to have anything to do with her and the first thing she does is run to the court with some bs and they side with her. Sometimes it feel like l'm fighting a losing battle. The judge is so biased.

Homie this is the new scorned woman trend. Regardless of why a man doesn't want to be with her, no matter how much of a dog he was/is no woman should be allowed to keep a man away from his children (outside of that being a real danger to the child not something she made up)

Don't give up though. Keep fighting for your child man, no matter how long it takes. And trust me, I know for a fact it's easier said than done.

 

[Conscious__Nkechi]

Yup! And to make it worse you can't refuse because then you look like the non cooperative party.

Honestly, this is really truly about a financial interest the government has in this whole thing. You hear people say c support is a scam -and it is. It's big business. I've spend countless hours researching this whole setup and it all goes back to money that it generates.

Hell I forgot that with the service fee, administrative fee, there another $25 dollar fee that I know is affect at least in MI that the non custodial parent has to pay. But wait a minute, although I pay child support, my divorce judgment granted me shared LEGAL AND PHYSICAL custody, so how am I non custodial?

Smh.
Do you now understand why I wouldn't ever go for child support?
It seems so hopeless once you have the system come in and stomp over every piece of justice.

Listen to me when I tell you this crucial advice if you aren't already doing it:
Document EVERYTHING. Trust me, keep a journal. It's in your best interest even if you never use it in court.

 

[gorilla]

I completely agree.
The most important years of a child's life is between the ages of 0-9. It is then broken down into 3 parts: 0-3, 3-6, 6-9.
A child's personality develops over this time and sticks with them for life. So much of them begins before the age of 9 and you are missing out on it, it's heartbreaking.

I am disgusted at that judges comment but not at all surprised. That doesn't mean it's acceptable or okay.
I wonder how he'd react if someone were to tell him "Suck it up, you can be with your children when they grow up."
He's like saying "Buck up soldier, you have a shot in hell but it's only your kids, not that important."

Get this tho, that same judge was arrested in a sex sting. Apparently, he's gay and tried to give the business to an undercover deputy in an airport bathroom:

http://www.clr.org/Halloran-Richard-Judge.pdf

 

[gorilla]

Smh.
Do you now understand why I wouldn't ever go for child support?
It seems so hopeless once you have the system come in and stomp over every piece of justice.

Listen to me when I tell you this crucial advice if you aren't already doing it:
Document EVERYTHING. Trust me, keep a journal. It's in your best interest even if you never use it in court.

Not only do I understand, but I applaud you. All the system does is take away your rights, make a possibly bad situation between you and the other parent ever worse, all while they sit back and profit from it.

 

[Conscious__Nkechi]

Get this tho, that same judge was arrested in a sex sting. Apparently, he's gay and tried to give the business to an undercover deputy in an airport bathroom:

http://www.clr.org/Halloran-Richard-Judge.pdf

Some judges aint worth a quarter of that degree they obtained to even be in their position.
The law wonders why we stray from involving them in our lives when it is needed the most.
How does one begin to feel comforatable enough to trust that reaching out won't backfire? It happens often.
So many crimes aren't even reported because of a general fear of the injustice that the system is.

I don't know if you saw when i posted this true event:
Long story short, lady has a boyfriend. He is over at her house along with her young daughter who is between the ages of 4 and 6.
She has to run down to the store so she leaves her young girl with her boyfriend since it is just downstairs.
When she returns, he is sodomizing her so she grabs a knife, stabs dude and he ends up doing a year maybe, she ends up getting a few. WTH??
Where is the justice here? Why did she do any time at all? It should have been deemed as defending a helpless life and she shouldn't have been slapped with anything.

Not only do I understand, but I applaud you. All the system does is take away your rights, make a possibly bad situation between you and the other parent ever worse, all while they sit back and profit from it.

Too many people fail to realize that bringing the courts in usually only complicates things. Once you are in the system, there is no going back.
This is why mediation is the first option before even taking it in front of a judge.

 

[gorilla]

Some judges aint worth a quarter of that degree they obtained to even be in their position.
The law wonders why we stray from involving them in our lives when it is needed the most.
How does one begin to feel comforatable enough to trust that reaching out won't backfire? It happens often.
So many crimes aren't even reported because of a general fear of the injustice that the system is.

I don't know if you saw when i posted this true event:
Long story short, lady has a boyfriend. He is over at her house along with her young daughter who is between the ages of 4 and 6.
She has to run down to the store so she leaves her young girl with her boyfriend since it is just downstairs.
She comes back, he is sodomizing her so she grabs a knife, stabs dude and he ends up doing a year maybe, she ends up getting a few. WTH??
Where is the justice here? Why did she do any time at all? It should have been deemed as self defense and she shouldn't have been slapped with anything.

Too many people fail to realize that bringing the courts in usually only complicates things. Once you are in the system, there is no going back.
This is why mediation is the first option before even taking it in front of a judge.

Wow, see that's another father nightmare right there, the dreaded new boyfriend being around your kids. First off that piece of shit shoulda been put to death. Say what you want but I'm a father and that's how I feel, you mess with kids. Second, where I fault her is for leaving her child alone with him. Any parent should know better than to leave their kids alone with people like that. I get that he was her boyfriend, but he wasn't her HUSBAND or the childs father. I see it like this, you already have kids who get molested by family members or even their own parent, so why would you trust a small child to be alone with a BOYFRIEND.

 

[Conscious__Nkechi]

Wow, see that's another father nightmare right there, the dreaded new boyfriend being around your kids. First off that piece of shit shoulda been put to death. Say what you want but I'm a father and that's how I feel, you mess with kids. Second, where I fault her is for leaving her child alone with him. Any parent should know better than to leave their kids alone with people like that. I get that he was her boyfriend, but he wasn't her HUSBAND or the childs father. I see it like this, you already have kids who get molested by family members or even their own parent, so why would you trust a small child to be alone with a BOYFRIEND.

I don't think I could live with myself if I would have been stupid enough to do what she did.
It will be very difficult for me to begin to be comfortable leaving my child in someone elses care. I would never bring a new man back to my home where my child rests his head, this would take a lot of time to establish that solid foundation where I feel at ease letting a man into my home. I have had my current place for a couple years and even though I have lived elsewhere between that time, I still have yet to invite a man into my home. I have been single much of that time but I have had a date in which case I would meet the man at the location and take separate vehicles.
I am cautious in that regard and don't feel comfortable otherwise. Sure, taking one vehicle would save money but I am not risking my comfort for a few bucks.

 

[bull6599]

***Going to get a vasectomy post*** After reading some of the stories in here shit aint worth it lol

 

[ipodman]

i cant live the life of a babydaddy. i dont want that life for me and my youngin

 

[UPTOWN]

Some background info:

We were married. I filed for divorce, in the divorce I asked for joint legal and joint physical custody with the intention of having the kids split their time between the two of us as close down the middle as possible. We mapped out a schedule. She tried to come up with every kind of excuse/activity to limit and reduce my time with them, but I fought that and agreed to take them to a reasonable amount of activities during my time with them. Meaning I wasn't going to just let her start signing them up for all kind of shit and be running around the city dropping them off here and there instead of spending time with them.

I have our judgement of divorce which states that we share joint physical/legal custody. I have the order signed with mapped out schedules. She started picking up the kids from school early so that by the time I got there (and yes I mean at least 15 mins or so before the last bell I would always be there) they'd already be gone. I went to the police, showed them the divorce judgement and schedule and argued that could be considered as parental kidnapping. They sent a squad car to her house, she refused to let the kids come out and they said they couldn't do anything else and I'd have to take her to court. We go to court, I take a letter signed by the main office on school letterhead that specifically stated the time I arrived and the fact that the kids had been picked up early from school by her. Judge tell her not to do it again, blah blah blah. We leave court and the same shit happens. This pattern continues, I hire another attorney, we go back to court they send us to mediation. More blah blah blah, we leave court with a new agreement, she does the same shit. File another complaint, hear nothing. I go up to friend of the court, they "tried contacting her but haven't heard anything". I file another complaint, wait, nothing gets done. I go back to friend of the court, ask to speak to our "family counselor" directly, she even admits this is getting out of hand. She finally files a show cause hearing. At the show cause hearing, the bitch serves me with the PPO, and then they adjourn the show cause hearing because of the PPO which I go to court next month to fight.

That's the tip of the iceberg, this shit been going on since I divorced her ass in 08. I got a file case full of all kinds of court shit on her and they won't budge. Let me miss 1 child support payment though, and all she has to do is call the warrant dept. at the county sheriffs.

awwww shit cuzzin YOU'RE GOOD!!! .... now its all about patience .. you just gotta keep your sword straight young man ... dont even think of instant gratification ... especially when it comes to court. the thing about shit like this is yes it seems like she's winning now .. but when the shit hits the fan, she's gonna have so much shit built up that she did wrong that she is gonna get slammed.

she's just pulling strings outta spite, ive seen this a bunch of times ... it takes a while but you will win ... everytime you lose your cool you're just prolonging your win cuzzo

 

[SOWETO]

goddamn. that nigga hate his kids.