Let me bump this thread because I don't think I ever explained what I was getting at, and I've been thinking about it.
It seems like if a white or Asian does better than a black in school blacks in general wouldn't say anything, like it is expected. But if a white or Asian beat up a black dude, for example, in general he wouldn't hear the end of it from other blacks. So it seems that we do compare ourselves to white people in a special way (i.e. a way that is different from how we compare ourselves to other blacks): we expect us to be better in some ways, but not others. And I'm saying we need to rethink the ways in which we expect ourselves to be better than other races. It would be better to compare ourselves in the way I mention in my opening post.