Different types of "Nice Guys"..read this interesting post (a lil long)

[iAMNOVA]

Cosign. Bruh, I remember I had an ex that thought she could "challenge" me and there would be no repercussions because she called me a "nice" guy( though I despise that term). We were in front of a group of people/her friends/my friends/group setting and the convo went like this:

Her: Sdrawkcabseh, You're a nice guy and all, but I think you should be more funny. I like a man that has a nice balance and is funny, but also has an edge. I need a man that can entertain me.

My response: Bitch, do I look like a circus to you?

Her: You're such a bastard, I thought you were a good man

My response: Well, that was a real man response.

I made that bitch walk home twelve miles and never heard from her again..............................................................

*denzel voice* "my man"....

 

[Prim-O Cla$$ic]

I ain't mad if a chick wanna be wit a thug....it's a America, do what ya wanna do.

I like them girls wit tats, gold teeth, wild colored weaves, and who dress slutty.

Chea!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Meet The Sniper]

I like where this thread is going.

 

[sdrawkcabseh]

I would most definitely disagree with you on this post. Nice guys who let their work speak for themselves will not tolerate a female that behaves in an unbecoming manner, and carries herself as such. These are the guys that are bachelors well into their 40's because of that. They know what they can do and offer to a woman, and will not settle for one that is unappreciative of that. If he is a man of integrity and dignity him having to tell his woman how she could get iced would be a non-issue. She will recognize his greatness, and what a privilege it is to be his woman.

Being a nice person is just that, a nice person. You don't have to tell someone how great you are, and how awesome you should feel to be with them. Do what feels good to you, and if that person shouldn't appreciate that, then it's their loss, not yours.

You kinda said what I said( or paraphrased it for that matter). Of course, a man that is about self-development( which is a human beings first priority), is working on developing himself morally, spiritually, financially, and all of the other ways that a man is supposed to grow. However, the commonality among a lot of women is that they diss that type of man on his come up and then want to take credit for his life, even though they couldv'e cared less about it when he didn't have much money, and was pushing an old broke down whip to work. A lotta chicks wanna be Dr. Frankenstein, they want to create a "fantasy" man, that is mixed with good and bad, but they fail to realize that a good man is going to be a good man regardless.

They want a man to be what they want him to be, and they don't accept a man with potential. Those women get left in the dust. Good women find/have good men, because they know how to treat them. Example, ( I gave this story in another thread as well), my own cousin. This girl is twenty-seven, claims to be a "successful, independent" woman. Well anyway, I introduce her to a friend of mine who's an engineer. This brotha has no kids, is in his Phd program, works two jobs, and is an all around repsonsible, focused man. He was twenty eight at the time.

I introduced the two, and they went on two dates. A few weeks later I ask my cousin how her dating the engineer is going, and she says, " well he was kinda boring. I needed a man with more "edge". Everything was too easy with him." Not two weeks later, I find out my cousin is chasing this little thug nigga that stays two blocks from her. This cat already has three babymamas, no job, and roams the block with his boys all day long. She ends up pregnant by him and fast forward to today, this guy hasn't seen her son once. She's crying/lamenting that there "are no good men around, and men aint shit", and it's funny because now the engineer that she dissed now owns his own company, and is married to a beautiful woman that treats him with respect and doesn't view him as boring.

My cousin recently asked me for his number because she wants to "reconnect" with the engineer now. I told my cousin, and I quote, " he's with a woman that has never found him boring, you chased the "exciting" man, now deal with it................................

 

[makaveli03]

You kinda said what I said( or paraphrased it for that matter). Of course, a man that is about self-development( which is a human beings first priority), is working on developing himself morally, spiritually, financially, and all of the other ways that a man is supposed to grow. However, the commonality among a lot of women is that they diss that type of man on his come up and then want to take credit for his life, even though they couldv'e cared less about it when he didn't have much money, and was pushing an old broke down whip to work. A lotta chicks wanna be Dr. Frankenstein, they want to create a "fantasy" man, that is mixed with good and bad, but they fail to realize that a good man is going to be a good man regardless.

They want a man to be what they want him to be, and they don't accept a man with potential. Those women get left in the dust. Good women find/have good men, because they know how to treat them. Example, ( I gave this story in another thread as well), my own cousin. This girl is twenty-seven, claims to be a "successful, independent" woman. Well anyway, I introduce her to a friend of mine who's an engineer. This brotha has no kids, is in his Phd program, works two jobs, and is an all around repsonsible, focused man. He was twenty eight at the time.

I introduced the two, and they went on two dates. A few weeks later I ask my cousin how her dating the engineer is going, and she says, " well he was kinda boring. I needed a man with more "edge". Everything was too easy with him." Not two weeks later, I find out my cousin is chasing this little thug nigga that stays two blocks from her. This cat already has three babymamas, no job, and roams the block with his boys all day long. She ends up pregnant by him and fast forward to today, this guy hasn't seen her son once. She's crying/lamenting that there "are no good men around, and men aint shit", and it's funny because now the engineer that she dissed now owns his own company, and is married to a beautiful woman that treats him with respect and doesn't view him as boring.

My cousin recently asked me for his number because she wants to "reconnect" with the engineer now. I told my cousin, and I quote, " he's with a woman that has never found him boring, you chased the "exciting" man, now deal with it................................

Its sad because this is our black women as a whole...this aint the way they was supposed to turn out....the more genuine dudes that get turned down and end up getting scooped up by a smarter black chic...or sadly a white woman....the less we have the chance of sustaining a consistent BLACK FAMILY in this country....but at the end of the day...at least for me..fuck everybody and how they react to shit....Im on this earth for one girl...and until I get her...I wont look for her..shes gonna look for me

 

[Elle_Music]

Its sad because this is our black women as a whole...this aint the way they was supposed to turn out....the more genuine dudes that get turned down and end up getting scooped up by a smarter black chic...or sadly a white woman....the less we have the chance of sustaining a consistent BLACK FAMILY in this country....but at the end of the day...at least for me..fuck everybody and how they react to shit....Im on this earth for one girl...and until I get her...I wont look for her..shes gonna look for me

the female in his story obviously wasn't worth two shits... His homie caught a break....It's good women and bad women...just like it's good men and bad men. It's always going to be that way.

 

[sdrawkcabseh]

Its sad because this is our black women as a whole...this aint the way they was supposed to turn out....the more genuine dudes that get turned down and end up getting scooped up by a smarter black chic...or sadly a white woman....the less we have the chance of sustaining a consistent BLACK FAMILY in this country....but at the end of the day...at least for me..fuck everybody and how they react to shit....Im on this earth for one girl...and until I get her...I wont look for her..shes gonna look for me

Yeah bro, you have to do what's right for you, and what feels right for you( what makes sense). Look beyond black women, and try to find someone that doesn't share your skin color. Mind you, there are good and bad women of every race, but honestly, a lot of black women take the cake when it comes down to maladaptive behaviors. But, you're doing right bro, don't "dumb" yourself down, or trap yourself with a black woman just to retain "racial acceptance". Whoever provides you with peae and happiness at the end of the day, go with her. You have to explore to find quality.

It may seem strange, but I stopped going to a lot of stores on my side of town, and have started going to other spots because the black females that worked at these stores had the WORST customer service.....................................................

 

[ms.jones]

You kinda said what I said( or paraphrased it for that matter). Of course, a man that is about self-development( which is a human beings first priority), is working on developing himself morally, spiritually, financially, and all of the other ways that a man is supposed to grow. However, the commonality among a lot of women is that they diss that type of man on his come up and then want to take credit for his life, even though they couldv'e cared less about it when he didn't have much money, and was pushing an old broke down whip to work. A lotta chicks wanna be Dr. Frankenstein, they want to create a "fantasy" man, that is mixed with good and bad, but they fail to realize that a good man is going to be a good man regardless.

They want a man to be what they want him to be, and they don't accept a man with potential. Those women get left in the dust. Good women find/have good men, because they know how to treat them. Example, ( I gave this story in another thread as well), my own cousin. This girl is twenty-seven, claims to be a "successful, independent" woman. Well anyway, I introduce her to a friend of mine who's an engineer. This brotha has no kids, is in his Phd program, works two jobs, and is an all around repsonsible, focused man. He was twenty eight at the time.

I introduced the two, and they went on two dates. A few weeks later I ask my cousin how her dating the engineer is going, and she says, " well he was kinda boring. I needed a man with more "edge". Everything was too easy with him." Not two weeks later, I find out my cousin is chasing this little thug nigga that stays two blocks from her. This cat already has three babymamas, no job, and roams the block with his boys all day long. She ends up pregnant by him and fast forward to today, this guy hasn't seen her son once. She's crying/lamenting that there "are no good men around, and men aint shit", and it's funny because now the engineer that she dissed now owns his own company, and is married to a beautiful woman that treats him with respect and doesn't view him as boring.

My cousin recently asked me for his number because she wants to "reconnect" with the engineer now. I told my cousin, and I quote, " he's with a woman that has never found him boring, you chased the "exciting" man, now deal with it................................

No, I didn't "kinda" say what you said. You feel the need to let it be known how you will drop a chick. I feel that something like that should be an unwritten rule in a relationship. I mean, if you both recognize the good, and value in each other, being told how easily they can be replaced is flat-out disrespect. No need to say it at all, in my opinion.

Bring up the subject of your cousin just shows how much of an ain't shit person she was, not a majority of women as a whole. That was a choice she made, and her choices shouldn't account for women in general. See it on an individual basis as you would anything else.

You say women want to be on some "build-a-man" type stuff, however, men are just the same. They want a woman that is submissive, a woman that can run 5 miles and have a flat stomach, a woman with no stretch marks, no visible scars, long hair, naturally perky breast...I mean the list can go on and on. I say that to say,men and women all want what they want. What some fail to realize is that is may not come in the package they want.

 

[rico_ENS]

most females view nice guys as weak n push overs but then turn around n say most men aint shit blah blah blah but thats cuz yall run them away. i blame the state of male n females relationships on women n it all started throughout the sexual revolution n females wantin to be indepent n all that bullshit now roles is changing n u got niggas rockin skin tight jeans n luiviton bags n females doin mma n boxing

 

[Yung_Souf_Money]

if i punch a bitch in the face that means i love her

 

[rico_ENS]

@ kat

i agree with u to certain extent, but the feminist revolution while u think its to give women their rights n just do i think of it as uncle sam n the powers that be realizing that they were only taxing half of the population thus opening a lot of different markets to make money off women. lemme ask u this do u think the family unit was more intact before or after the revolution? why are the divorce rates so high? why do american women wanna wear both the pants n the skirt in the relationship when most of yall cant cook or clean n cant even take care of a man like a real woman suppose to.

 

[sdrawkcabseh]

No, I didn't "kinda" say what you said. You feel the need to let it be known how you will drop a chick. I feel that something like that should be an unwritten rule in a relationship. I mean, if you both recognize the good, and value in each other, being told how easily they can be replaced is flat-out disrespect. No need to say it at all, in my opinion.

Bring up the subject of your cousin just shows how much of an ain't shit person she was, not a majority of women as a whole. That was a choice she made, and her choices shouldn't account for women in general. See it on an individual basis as you would anything else.

You say women want to be on some "build-a-man" type stuff, however, men are just the same. They want a woman that is submissive, a woman that can run 5 miles and have a flat stomach, a woman with no stretch marks, no visible scars, long hair, naturally perky breast...I mean the list can go on and on. I say that to say,men and women all want what they want. What some fail to realize is that is may not come in the package they want.

But the difference between men and women is, men usually pick women that already have the requirements they want, women pick men that they think they can "mold" to have the requirements that they want. Women try to change men, while men simply change the woman that they're dealing with for a woman that won't try to change them.............................................

 

[makaveli03]

But the difference between men and women is, men usually pick women that already have the requirements they want, women pick men that they think they can "mold" to have the requirements that they want. Women try to change men, while men simply change the woman that they're dealing with for a woman that won't try to change them.............................................

Even worse women base who they choose over some temporary..."attraction" that is SUPPOSED to happen when in reality we all can control who we are attracted to because ITS PSYCHOLOGICAL...attraction doesnt come from outer space....a real relationship is built on common sense...and if you and that man have a connection and you choose to turn him down basically because he doesnt have that "it" you claim to be looking for...you will lose out on someone that may be the best thing in your life...but they want to learn that the hard way...the difference between men and women is that a man doesnt base a relationship on FEELINGS..but Compatibility and Loyalty and respect....if someone whos a woman gives that to a man..HE WILL KEEP THAT....a woman wont

 

[jay83]

Some women just need drama and excitment in their life. Its as simple as that. Most women who say the "get bored easily" are ones who chase thugs alot. I just think many women and men never take the time to develop themselves.

I believe if most people had constructive hobbies and a real knowledge of self, there wouldnt be so much bullshit between the genders.

Some females need to be constantly entertained. Some want a guy that will make their friends jealous. Some just like being treated like crap because thats all they know.

Some females never really had experienced with a guy thats well rounded. Most just know the polar opposites. The thug, the lame, the nerd, and the party guy. But a well rounded woman knows theres other well rounded guys out there as well.

 

[rico_ENS]

ay mami how u write titangraph warning when yo shit long as fuck...but anyway is that u in yo avi? u soundin like a chick who wears a mullet n cut off shorts talkin bout caveman yada yada. truth of the matter is yall females dnt know wat the fuck ya want u want a nice guy but then turn around n have babies with gud for nuffin niggas. what i noticed is that american women demand the most shit n are the worst when doin the "traditional women shit" like cook, clean, taking care of the kids or wat not females are suppose to be the backbone while the men are the HEAD of the household get ur roles rite mami n u might get married one day.

 

[makaveli03]

ay mami how u write titangraph warning when yo shit long as fuck...but anyway is that u in yo avi? u soundin like a chick who wears a mullet n cut off shorts talkin bout caveman yada yada. truth of the matter is yall females dnt know wat the fuck ya want u want a nice guy but then turn around n have babies with gud for nuffin niggas. what i noticed is that american women demand the most shit n are the worst when doin the "traditional women shit" like cook, clean, taking care of the kids or wat not females are suppose to be the backbone while the men are the HEAD of the household get ur roles rite mami n u might get married one day.

lol mami? stop failing nigga..thats tatyana ali...step your celebrities knowledge up...im a dude

 

[ms.jones]

But the difference between men and women is, men usually pick women that already have the requirements they want, women pick men that they think they can "mold" to have the requirements that they want. Women try to change men, while men simply change the woman that they're dealing with for a woman that won't try to change them.............................................

Ahh, see...men will choose what is aesthetically pleasing to them. In speaking to my guy friend about wants and needs in a mate, he said and I quote "She just gotta look good, and be stupid", meaning he wanted someone he could "mold" into his perfect mate, and look like something presentable. Now, do all guys think like this? Probably not, but see how easy it was for me to generalize his statement? Men don't always choose what's best for them, just like women.

It's a two way street, dear heart. We all want want we want, and will do our best to make that person be something they may not be. Just like nice guys get the shit end of the stick, we women get the brunt of bullcrap, too.

 

[Fooley]

KAY. K-A-YYY!!!

:Ahem:

(Titangraph Warning ^_^ )

The truth of the matter is that once divorce as we know it only came to be in the 50's. Prior to that, to get a divorce you had to prove, without a doubt, that your spouse exceptionally cruel, mentally ill, or had cheated. If you couldn't prove on of those three things to a judge, you got no divorce. Once 'no-fault-divorce' was legislated divorce rates skyrocketed. And surprisingly enough, while marriage rates went slightly down between 1990-2002, divorce rates (which were all ready lower), decreased nearly accross the board in the US.

The family unit, as it was know pre-feminism (which is coincidentally, pre-no-fault divorce), was a unit of functionality that may be percieved to work for its time, since the 'roles' were more clearly defined. However, those roles were only clear, because the opportunities of women where legally and socially limited to being a house-wife, or a very low level worker. They virtually had no way to be independent, and so had to resort to marriage in order to

(hopefully) guarantee that they were fed. And if circumstances happened to force them to marry a horrible man, well, tough luck. Because the chances for a divorce initialized by a woman to actually go through were slim to none.

The truth of the matter is that the line between roles have been blurred. It's unrealistic for men to expect women to retain all of the 'female' roles while still working full time, since most families cannot survive on a single income anymore. Whether men like it or not, women have decided to (and need to) step into certain positions that were once dominated by men. They earn incomes, they run businesses, and right now they're more women then men attending university in many schools. Society as a whole needs to reevaluate this outdated idea that what you have between your legs determines what you do best. And relationships need to be based on what works for individuals, not on some caveman concept of "I am Man. Feed me Sammich".

I disagree. I think the reason the institution of marriage is taking a turn for the worse is because people are slowly discovering that it is an outdated concept that makes absolutely no sense. People are no longer expected to get married and face no societal pressure for the decision not to. I also find it hypocritical how women no longer want to be bound by the ropes of gender roles but perpetuate gender stereotypes onto males

 

[Fooley]

Ok, @ the bolded. I don't think I made a definite statement as to why marriage is 'taking a turn for the worse', just that the idea that divorce rates are crazy high and still increasing isn't actually the case. Though your POV rings true, not completely imo. But I understand it.

Which stereotypes are you referring to?

And do you feel that that the same is not done to females? Or that one gender unfairly rebukes gender based expectations more than the other?

Also, to whichever stereotypes you are referring to, could you point out cases where a similar expectation is placed on women that "we all" rebuke?

(I'm hoping you and I can have more of a rational discussion, then the previous failed attempt. Though I may not be able to respond soon, I've got class in a bit)

I've already named so many in previous posts, it's really pointless. I'll just say that women want equality but expect preferential treatment.

 

[Gnawledgeable]

You meet a female, get to know her, let her know that you are capable of being more than a guy she talks to, have your mind in the gutter sometimes, tease her a bit and then you got it.