Blog: Black men are the problem

[T. Sanford]

I know this chick that I was trying to get at 2 years ago but she was acting stuck up & her conversation game was dry. So I stop messaging her. 2 years & 2 kids later, she trying to feed me messages in my inbox yet her convo game was still dry. I seen she had kids in her photos & hit the mutombo rejection (from the commercial) on her.

That Kendrick Lamar line from memories come to mind when I seen that shss "Fast forward wait is that you/ With them big old thighs after school/ And yo 3 kids and 3 daddies and same car note that’s overdue"

she was cute back then wasnt she... not thinking her shit stunk

She was still acting stuck up & she message me first. Im looking like "how this girl gon talk dry when she invited herself in my inbox first". I see why she's a single mother because she probably don't know how to socialized with people (especially the ones that's trying to get to know her).

Plus I really don't do single mothers anymore. 1 child minimum & she gotta be on some classy woman shss.

 

[2stepz_ahead]

IMO I think that Black Women and Women in general are too scared to fall in love. They do not want to fall deeply in love. They marry because of convience, out of necessity, marry for money etc...

They love dating and marrying Bad boys. It's not just a Mary J Blige song. They're all about the drama.

But you never hear Black Men saying they want to marry a bad girl. On the whole we're not about all that drama.

your right...but its because they think the bad guys are fun an will protect them...an a man that acts like he has sense is corny an cant protect them because he rather be diplomatic.

there whole image of a man is fuked up.

like you said...guys dont want to marry some wreckless chick...they are for fukkin an moving on but not marrying. we dont put too much into marrying for money or stability.

for most of us, if we choose you its because we love you...nothing more.

funny how no more chicks coming back in here.

 

[desertrain10]

lol this is what i am talking about

instead of acknowledging the plight of black women and the sexism which serves to marginalize blk women that exist within our communities, you want to make this all about black men and question the character/intelligence of blk women. but its not our fault we aren't paid as much as men, we are often times overlooked for promotions in the workplace, we still are fighting for our reproductive rights , 1/4 women will be raped in her life time, etc

fact is black women routinely jump to defense of a black man. black women were the backbone of the civil rights movement. and today we are the ones on the ground leading the way in protests for the civil rights of both men and women, and demanding that our political voice is heard

but how can this relationship be called an equal partnership and how can we move forward when black men refuse to acknowledge sexism is still a very real problem in this country or are quick to invoke their patriarchal privilege thus supporting the idea that a group can and should be targeted, thus cementing their own marginalization

smh. take time to understand a black woman's pov instead of derailing the topic and making it about black men i.e. you. which most people in privilege social standing usually do when confronted.

yes you are man and being a man is global privilege.... black women have two oppressed social standings against them like most women of color. the first things to progress our understanding of each other is to listen. so please take a seat and listen young man...

Ok so I present facts and you present emotions and somehow I'm the bad guy. Did I specifically say that black men have it worse off than black women? No. I listed facts and you INFERRED that from the information that I presented. Then you predictably fall right back on feminist rhetoric.

1. In most major cities college grad women get paid(on average) 8-17% more than men the same age.

2. Affirmative action has seen more white women unfairly promoted to higher positions than any other combination of gender/race

3. Immediately after conception, a woman holds 100% power over the fate of that child. The father of the child has no control or even any say as to whether he even wants to be a father or not.

4. "1/4 of women will be raped in their lifetime" is the absolute pinnacle of bullshit(and absolutely false) statistics. Why don't you tell me the statistics for false rape charges? Or how about cuckholdry statistics. There's another thread on the front page of this very forum about a dude being forced to pay child support on a kid that wasn't his for like 8 years just because he signed the birth certificate of the child(thinking it was his)

5. If black women were truly the back bone of the civil rights movement then it's no wonder that it was an overall bust, black women largely disappeared from that movement as soon as the feminist movement came along

6. Do you truly believe that your political voice will be heard in any legitimate way?

And again with the victimization of women. You should really take a look around. ALL MEN(not just black men) are falling behind women when it comes to high school diplomas, college diplomas, stable careers, the jobrate in general, wages, you name it. These are facts. Then again, I wouldn't expect a person who probably jumped at the chance to use buzzwords like "privilege" and "oppressed" in a post to do their own research most of them just regurgitate rhetoric

Please, please don't try and patronize because when I say that you don't know what you are talking about I really really mean it. I really do this. When it comes to learning about the history of our people(or really learning in general) you are not in my league. Wtf can you teach me when you yourself are stating inaccuracies as if they were law? In my opinion the black man/black woman combo represents the pinnacle of human development, both physically and intellectually. I'm probably more pro-black than you can even understand. I'm the type of person that searches for ACTUAL solutions, which means I look at the problem and am capable of analyzing the causes. I want my people to succeed, and if have to be the person to reeducate the "educated" then I will be that person. You may not like me but you WILL learn something from me.

If you're gonna respond to me then please know what you're talking about first ok missy(I'm assuming/hoping you're a female going from your post)

Smh lol

We can both pull stats out our asses .... But fact remains we live in a country where a growing number of politicians are fighting to take away a woman's reproductive rights, so yea sexism is very much alive. And so is racism. I am not a blk man so i wont be so arrogant and assume that i have it some how rougher

And if u reread all my posts never have i said that blk women had it worst than blk man....

My point is that blk men like all men are either dismissive or insentive to the plight of blk women and some are even complicit in it as far as sexism is concerned, which alot of the female posters agreed with. You can disgree all you want, but that is how i and others feel...

Take for example, blk women have not been able to count on blk men to show up in the voting booths to vote against politicians who openly have opposed a woman's right to choose, yet blk women are the main ones you see protesting to end pratices like stop and frisk which unfairly targets blk men

Yes we live in a sexist soceity to no fault of yourself, but if we are to progress as a community our mothers, sisters, aunts, etc must be given the things they need to succeed as well as our men

 

[coop9889]

Didnt read.

Only women to say this type of shit aint gettin dick so they bitter

 

[xxCivicxx]

lol this is what i am talking about

instead of acknowledging the plight of black women and the sexism which serves to marginalize blk women that exist within our communities, you want to make this all about black men and question the character/intelligence of blk women. but its not our fault we aren't paid as much as men, we are often times overlooked for promotions in the workplace, we still are fighting for our reproductive rights , 1/4 women will be raped in her life time, etc

fact is black women routinely jump to defense of a black man. black women were the backbone of the civil rights movement. and today we are the ones on the ground leading the way in protests for the civil rights of both men and women, and demanding that our political voice is heard

but how can this relationship be called an equal partnership and how can we move forward when black men refuse to acknowledge sexism is still a very real problem in this country or are quick to invoke their patriarchal privilege thus supporting the idea that a group can and should be targeted, thus cementing their own marginalization

smh. take time to understand a black woman's pov instead of derailing the topic and making it about black men i.e. you. which most people in privilege social standing usually do when confronted.

yes you are man and being a man is global privilege.... black women have two oppressed social standings against them like most women of color. the first things to progress our understanding of each other is to listen. so please take a seat and listen young man...

Ok so I present facts and you present emotions and somehow I'm the bad guy. Did I specifically say that black men have it worse off than black women? No. I listed facts and you INFERRED that from the information that I presented. Then you predictably fall right back on feminist rhetoric.

1. In most major cities college grad women get paid(on average) 8-17% more than men the same age.

2. Affirmative action has seen more white women unfairly promoted to higher positions than any other combination of gender/race

3. Immediately after conception, a woman holds 100% power over the fate of that child. The father of the child has no control or even any say as to whether he even wants to be a father or not.

4. "1/4 of women will be raped in their lifetime" is the absolute pinnacle of bullshit(and absolutely false) statistics. Why don't you tell me the statistics for false rape charges? Or how about cuckholdry statistics. There's another thread on the front page of this very forum about a dude being forced to pay child support on a kid that wasn't his for like 8 years just because he signed the birth certificate of the child(thinking it was his)

5. If black women were truly the back bone of the civil rights movement then it's no wonder that it was an overall bust, black women largely disappeared from that movement as soon as the feminist movement came along

6. Do you truly believe that your political voice will be heard in any legitimate way?

And again with the victimization of women. You should really take a look around. ALL MEN(not just black men) are falling behind women when it comes to high school diplomas, college diplomas, stable careers, the jobrate in general, wages, you name it. These are facts. Then again, I wouldn't expect a person who probably jumped at the chance to use buzzwords like "privilege" and "oppressed" in a post to do their own research most of them just regurgitate rhetoric

Please, please don't try and patronize because when I say that you don't know what you are talking about I really really mean it. I really do this. When it comes to learning about the history of our people(or really learning in general) you are not in my league. Wtf can you teach me when you yourself are stating inaccuracies as if they were law? In my opinion the black man/black woman combo represents the pinnacle of human development, both physically and intellectually. I'm probably more pro-black than you can even understand. I'm the type of person that searches for ACTUAL solutions, which means I look at the problem and am capable of analyzing the causes. I want my people to succeed, and if have to be the person to reeducate the "educated" then I will be that person. You may not like me but you WILL learn something from me.

If you're gonna respond to me then please know what you're talking about first ok missy(I'm assuming/hoping you're a female going from your post)

Smh lol

We can both pull stats out our asses .... But fact remains we live in a country where a growing number of politicians are fighting to take away a woman's reproductive rights, so yea sexism is very much alive. And so is racism. I am not a blk man so i wont be so arrogant and assume that i have it some how rougher

And if u reread all my posts never have i said that blk women had it worst than blk man....

My point is that blk men like all men are either dismissive or insentive to the plight of blk women and some are even complicit in it as far as sexism is concerned, which alot of the female posters agreed with. You can disgree all you want, but that is how i and others feel...

Take for example, blk women have not been able to count on blk men to show up in the voting booths to vote against politicians who openly have opposed a woman's right to choose, yet blk women are the main ones you see protesting to end pratices like stop and frisk which unfairly targets blk men

Yes we live in a sexist soceity to no fault of yourself, but if we are to progress as a community our mothers, sisters, aunts, etc must be given the things they need to succeed as well as our men

You can "smh lol" at the truth all you want, it's still the truth. Maybe YOU pull stats out of your ass, I pull them out of the real world, and you have failed to refute ANY facts that I have listed so far. And once again you bring the focus back on reproductive rights as if that was the main issue here in the first place. Maybe when MEN get ANY reproductive rights, then they'll give more of a fuck about yours.

You keep speaking in generalities "black men are either dismissive or insensitive to the plight of black woman" where is this generally true? Please tell me so I can see this for myself. What I see are tons of women who don't give a flying fuck about the condition of the black man in the society because white men tell them not to give a fuck. What I see are a lot of very good hard working black men overlooked by women because they're missing the thug factor. Where is this anti-woman sexism that you keep talking about? I see a lot of anti-men sexism in the real world and in the media quite often. Last time I checked, American law largely supports women these days, from Title IX to domestic violence laws to family court laws to divorce laws etc etc

Fyi I've never seen a black woman so much as mention stop and frisk. Where are these protests happening?

You can either absorb the facts that I have laid out and accept the truth or you can wait and stay in denial until the truth falls right onto your head. If you're truly as smart as you probably think you are then actually use your brain and go learn ACTUAL facts

 

[2stepz_ahead]

Black women have it incredibly rough in this world, I will agree that a lot of Black men don't recognize that or do anything to help them. Black men got it hard but Black women have it twice as hard being double minorities.

yes, yes

when it comes sexism black men ( not all but more than a few) are either silent, in denial and/or quick to invoke their patriarchal privilege

take for example, in regards to issues that effect blk women in particular like single motherhood, domestic violence, and poverty they rather question a woman's moral character, emotional/mental state, intelligence, etc instead of addressing the challenges sexism as well as racism pose for these women

and no its not just black men, its all men. the opportunity to degrade/objectify women never fails to bring them together

Sexism is not as bad for black women as racism is bad for black men. Not even close. It is more acceptable to Non-Black America to be black if you're a woman than if a man. Far more.

lol this is not a contest or am i trolling, bruh. just trying to have an honest discussion

and at the end of the day black women have to deal with sexism AND racism in a country where not only more than half of americans living in poverty are women but a growing number of politicians are arguing that a woman should not have control of her own womb....

smh. you will never know what it's like to feel the pressure of going through life attempting to push beyond boundaries that society has placed on me because not only because i am blk but i am also a woman. so please don't act like you do.

yes, sexism has always existed in the larger U.S. culture, which was and is a white, male dominated culture so fuck the author of the article/letter whatever it is in the o/p. but lets not act like blk men haven't been complicit it, unwittingly or not.

Nothing you said even challenges what I said, which is that the racism black men face is worse than the sexism and racism black women face put together.

again this is not a contest

lol obviously my post are going over your head so let's just agree to disagree

Ok, so you're making a different point. I'm not insensitive to sexism, but I do think black men alone get the full force of anti-black racism.

You trolling?

You don't think black women are more acceptable to White America? This seems obvious to me.

Black women are double minorities

They get it really bad

black, woman, and immigrant, i've achieved the minority trifecta lol

but you fine ass fukk an i wanna lick your sweaty ass right from the gym or a long run....wait what are we talking about...can you put your bootycheek away please....i keep losing focus

 

[death187sin]

Its funny how when you find happiness and love, articles like this make you laugh.

Even if I got divorced and ended up back on the market (God forbid!), my husband, men I've encountered in my social circles and profession, and a handful of you fine men on the IC have opened my eyes to how many good, quality black men there are out there. It ain't that damn dire out here.

You are what you attract. When I was out here doing hoodrat shit with my friends, I attracted bummy hoodrat niggas.

It's always single ugly bitches writing this shit when they could be bent over the bed getting fucked and loved on by their nonexistent man.

Nothing to see here folks.

Ether delivered accordingly.

 

[GeminiRose]

I didnt read but in fairness. Most of you niggas REALLY aint shit. So Im sure its at least 35% truth in that wall of Niggress hate.

That said most human beings in general arent worth a fuck so its not necessarily race centric. The only real problem is people dont realize the person they attract says a lot about them. Easier to blame others than look internally.

If your Girlfriends are all attractive but stupid it says you're shallow.

If your boyfriends keep beating you it says you need to learn to STFU or keep your hands to yourself.

They things you go through in your relationships say a lot about YOU more than they say about the other person. And until everybody white, black or otherwise can admit that they will continue on that same bitter road. Not to say that everything is YOUR fault. But your reaction to everything because your responsibility.

I think the fact that a good number of people still don't really socialize outside their direct race/ethnic group for the most part still contributes to many of the "grass is greener on the other side" or "I bet *whatever race i'm not of men/women don't do this" thought processes by people. I say it often that one of the main reason that black men seem to go so hard on black women and not women of any other race/ethnicity is because the majority still only deal with black woman so when they complain about women as a whole, because 98.9% of their experience with women are with black women that's who they're directing it at. If they had more experiences with different women they'd see the complaints are pretty much the same across the board.

But there are real differences between black and non-black women. To mention just one, non-black women won't turn down a brother anywhere near as much for not sounding stereotypically black. Don't try to act like there aren't some cultural differences between blacks and whites.

You can say the same about black men!

 

[2stepz_ahead]

I didnt read but in fairness. Most of you niggas REALLY aint shit. So Im sure its at least 35% truth in that wall of Niggress hate.

That said most human beings in general arent worth a fuck so its not necessarily race centric. The only real problem is people dont realize the person they attract says a lot about them. Easier to blame others than look internally.

If your Girlfriends are all attractive but stupid it says you're shallow.

If your boyfriends keep beating you it says you need to learn to STFU or keep your hands to yourself.

They things you go through in your relationships say a lot about YOU more than they say about the other person. And until everybody white, black or otherwise can admit that they will continue on that same bitter road. Not to say that everything is YOUR fault. But your reaction to everything because your responsibility.

I think the fact that a good number of people still don't really socialize outside their direct race/ethnic group for the most part still contributes to many of the "grass is greener on the other side" or "I bet *whatever race i'm not of men/women don't do this" thought processes by people. I say it often that one of the main reason that black men seem to go so hard on black women and not women of any other race/ethnicity is because the majority still only deal with black woman so when they complain about women as a whole, because 98.9% of their experience with women are with black women that's who they're directing it at. If they had more experiences with different women they'd see the complaints are pretty much the same across the board.

But there are real differences between black and non-black women. To mention just one, non-black women won't turn down a brother anywhere near as much for not sounding stereotypically black. Don't try to act like there aren't some cultural differences between blacks and whites.

You can say the same about black men!

false.....guys will talk to anyone thats fine...

 

[T. Sanford]

When I was growing up I watched my father go to work everyday and pay the bills and I assumed that is how a man is supposed to be, but when I got older I found out it was all a lie these black women didnt care I owned two homes and had a nice job it seems they would rather have a nigga who has nothing so they can complain. The reality is most black women dont even know what a man is because they were raised in a home with no man in it that is why I am trying to only date women who were raised in a two parent household but that is about as hard to find as a black woman with no kids.

That's all I see nowadays. Most these chicks in my city be complaining on the book but be dating the same type of nigga every time. More then likely the nigga is in a gang etc. Then when they get them somebody (who only go be in relations with her for a couple of weeks or months), they wanna tag them in all of their statuses. They be happy ass hell to be in a relationship (quick to change that fb relationship status smh) They dont really want a relationship, they just want the every day attention.

I gotta distant cousin that broke up with her baby daddy on fb about 8 times. She done been engaged about two & three times. Every time they break up, she turn in to pro black woman like Delores Tucker, making self motivation status like "sometimes as a woman, you gotta move on. Its all about my son, finna go back to school, finna start going outta town etc etc". Then when she get back with em then its "we aint go never end, we been together since I was 15. bout to go over my mother-in-law house etc". I just be laughing & shaking my head with her Ronald Mcdonald acting ass

 

[jayvon32]

 

[Chuchk]

the author........

Honestly the greatest post of all time

 

[Undefeatable]

I didnt read but in fairness. Most of you niggas REALLY aint shit. So Im sure its at least 35% truth in that wall of Niggress hate.

That said most human beings in general arent worth a fuck so its not necessarily race centric. The only real problem is people dont realize the person they attract says a lot about them. Easier to blame others than look internally.

If your Girlfriends are all attractive but stupid it says you're shallow.

If your boyfriends keep beating you it says you need to learn to STFU or keep your hands to yourself.

They things you go through in your relationships say a lot about YOU more than they say about the other person. And until everybody white, black or otherwise can admit that they will continue on that same bitter road. Not to say that everything is YOUR fault. But your reaction to everything because your responsibility.

I think the fact that a good number of people still don't really socialize outside their direct race/ethnic group for the most part still contributes to many of the "grass is greener on the other side" or "I bet *whatever race i'm not of men/women don't do this" thought processes by people. I say it often that one of the main reason that black men seem to go so hard on black women and not women of any other race/ethnicity is because the majority still only deal with black woman so when they complain about women as a whole, because 98.9% of their experience with women are with black women that's who they're directing it at. If they had more experiences with different women they'd see the complaints are pretty much the same across the board.

But there are real differences between black and non-black women. To mention just one, non-black women won't turn down a brother anywhere near as much for not sounding stereotypically black. Don't try to act like there aren't some cultural differences between blacks and whites.

You can say the same about black men!

That is news to me.

 

[GeminiRose]

I didnt read but in fairness. Most of you niggas REALLY aint shit. So Im sure its at least 35% truth in that wall of Niggress hate.

That said most human beings in general arent worth a fuck so its not necessarily race centric. The only real problem is people dont realize the person they attract says a lot about them. Easier to blame others than look internally.

If your Girlfriends are all attractive but stupid it says you're shallow.

If your boyfriends keep beating you it says you need to learn to STFU or keep your hands to yourself.

They things you go through in your relationships say a lot about YOU more than they say about the other person. And until everybody white, black or otherwise can admit that they will continue on that same bitter road. Not to say that everything is YOUR fault. But your reaction to everything because your responsibility.

I think the fact that a good number of people still don't really socialize outside their direct race/ethnic group for the most part still contributes to many of the "grass is greener on the other side" or "I bet *whatever race i'm not of men/women don't do this" thought processes by people. I say it often that one of the main reason that black men seem to go so hard on black women and not women of any other race/ethnicity is because the majority still only deal with black woman so when they complain about women as a whole, because 98.9% of their experience with women are with black women that's who they're directing it at. If they had more experiences with different women they'd see the complaints are pretty much the same across the board.

But there are real differences between black and non-black women. To mention just one, non-black women won't turn down a brother anywhere near as much for not sounding stereotypically black. Don't try to act like there aren't some cultural differences between blacks and whites.

You can say the same about black men!

false.....guys will talk to anyone thats fine...

And men don't do the same thing??? And I often see a dude that will pass up a classy black woman for a ghetto hoodrat Shaniqua. Happens all the time bro! Both black women and men have issues and we need to work on it!

 

[GeminiRose]

I didnt read but in fairness. Most of you niggas REALLY aint shit. So Im sure its at least 35% truth in that wall of Niggress hate.

That said most human beings in general arent worth a fuck so its not necessarily race centric. The only real problem is people dont realize the person they attract says a lot about them. Easier to blame others than look internally.

If your Girlfriends are all attractive but stupid it says you're shallow.

If your boyfriends keep beating you it says you need to learn to STFU or keep your hands to yourself.

They things you go through in your relationships say a lot about YOU more than they say about the other person. And until everybody white, black or otherwise can admit that they will continue on that same bitter road. Not to say that everything is YOUR fault. But your reaction to everything because your responsibility.

I think the fact that a good number of people still don't really socialize outside their direct race/ethnic group for the most part still contributes to many of the "grass is greener on the other side" or "I bet *whatever race i'm not of men/women don't do this" thought processes by people. I say it often that one of the main reason that black men seem to go so hard on black women and not women of any other race/ethnicity is because the majority still only deal with black woman so when they complain about women as a whole, because 98.9% of their experience with women are with black women that's who they're directing it at. If they had more experiences with different women they'd see the complaints are pretty much the same across the board.

But there are real differences between black and non-black women. To mention just one, non-black women won't turn down a brother anywhere near as much for not sounding stereotypically black. Don't try to act like there aren't some cultural differences between blacks and whites.

You can say the same about black men!

That is news to me.

Some black men won't take a chance on a different type of black chick. And don't let her speak proper! An associate of mine said she used to speak proper but switched up her speech so she could date black men. I have that problem sometimes with black men. They judge me the wrong way until they get to know me and see I'm "down". Lol

 

[CashmoneyDux]

We still talking about this?

Posters in here

 

[BoldChild]

I didnt read but in fairness. Most of you niggas REALLY aint shit. So Im sure its at least 35% truth in that wall of Niggress hate.

That said most human beings in general arent worth a fuck so its not necessarily race centric. The only real problem is people dont realize the person they attract says a lot about them. Easier to blame others than look internally.

If your Girlfriends are all attractive but stupid it says you're shallow.

If your boyfriends keep beating you it says you need to learn to STFU or keep your hands to yourself.

They things you go through in your relationships say a lot about YOU more than they say about the other person. And until everybody white, black or otherwise can admit that they will continue on that same bitter road. Not to say that everything is YOUR fault. But your reaction to everything because your responsibility.

I think the fact that a good number of people still don't really socialize outside their direct race/ethnic group for the most part still contributes to many of the "grass is greener on the other side" or "I bet *whatever race i'm not of men/women don't do this" thought processes by people. I say it often that one of the main reason that black men seem to go so hard on black women and not women of any other race/ethnicity is because the majority still only deal with black woman so when they complain about women as a whole, because 98.9% of their experience with women are with black women that's who they're directing it at. If they had more experiences with different women they'd see the complaints are pretty much the same across the board.

But there are real differences between black and non-black women. To mention just one, non-black women won't turn down a brother anywhere near as much for not sounding stereotypically black. Don't try to act like there aren't some cultural differences between blacks and whites.

You can say the same about black men!

false.....guys will talk to anyone thats fine...

And men don't do the same thing??? And I often see a dude that will pass up a classy black woman for a ghetto hoodrat Shaniqua. Happens all the time bro! Both black women and men have issues and we need to work on it!

Probably cause Shaniqua a freak, and she busting it open.

 

[MoneyPowerRespect]

i really like this thread.

i was told the other day that i don't have an accurate image of a male role model [a.k.a. 'daddy'] because i don't have a father. the only problem that i have with that statement is that i know for a fact men can be/are financially responsible. men can be assertive in what they want from a woman and so forth and so on. these are things that i see on a daily basis IRL. i come across men who want someone who can be supportive without always being the victim.

A poster said that 'women were the backbone in the civil rights movement'. that is a very true statement, however, they had something to fight for. what exactly is a woman to fight for when her man isn't showing the signs of wanting better for themselves?

i honestly feel as though there needs to be a better dialogue between people of color. there are problems that face men and women, but it is up to us to support each other. it's not about who goes through what. it's about going through the storm- together.

however, you don't have to lower your standards to be with someone. that seems to be a problem that successful black people seem to have. that's why you'll see doctor's with these hood hoes.

 

[ghostdog56]

i really like this thread.

i was told the other day that i don't have an accurate image of a male role model [a.k.a. 'daddy'] because i don't have a father. the only problem that i have with that statement is that i know for a fact men can be/are financially responsible. men can be assertive in what they want from a woman and so forth and so on. these are things that i see on a daily basis IRL. i come across men who want someone who can be supportive without always being the victim.

A poster said that 'women were the backbone in the civil rights movement'. that is a very true statement, however, they had something to fight for. what exactly is a woman to fight for when her man isn't showing the signs of wanting better for themselves?

i honestly feel as though there needs to be a better dialogue between people of color. there are problems that face men and women, but it is up to us to support each other. it's not about who goes through what. it's about going through the storm- together.

however, you don't have to lower your standards to be with someone. that seems to be a problem that successful black people seem to have. that's why you'll see doctor's with these hood hoes.

In my opinion if a woman grew up without a father in the house then how can that women even know what a man is? She might know what a male is but not a man

 

[2stepz_ahead]

I didnt read but in fairness. Most of you niggas REALLY aint shit. So Im sure its at least 35% truth in that wall of Niggress hate.

That said most human beings in general arent worth a fuck so its not necessarily race centric. The only real problem is people dont realize the person they attract says a lot about them. Easier to blame others than look internally.

If your Girlfriends are all attractive but stupid it says you're shallow.

If your boyfriends keep beating you it says you need to learn to STFU or keep your hands to yourself.

They things you go through in your relationships say a lot about YOU more than they say about the other person. And until everybody white, black or otherwise can admit that they will continue on that same bitter road. Not to say that everything is YOUR fault. But your reaction to everything because your responsibility.

I think the fact that a good number of people still don't really socialize outside their direct race/ethnic group for the most part still contributes to many of the "grass is greener on the other side" or "I bet *whatever race i'm not of men/women don't do this" thought processes by people. I say it often that one of the main reason that black men seem to go so hard on black women and not women of any other race/ethnicity is because the majority still only deal with black woman so when they complain about women as a whole, because 98.9% of their experience with women are with black women that's who they're directing it at. If they had more experiences with different women they'd see the complaints are pretty much the same across the board.

But there are real differences between black and non-black women. To mention just one, non-black women won't turn down a brother anywhere near as much for not sounding stereotypically black. Don't try to act like there aren't some cultural differences between blacks and whites.

You can say the same about black men!

false.....guys will talk to anyone thats fine...

And men don't do the same thing??? And I often see a dude that will pass up a classy black woman for a ghetto hoodrat Shaniqua. Happens all the time bro! Both black women and men have issues and we need to work on it!

thats because classy chicks tend to be high maintenance,. we are saving ourselves a headache.

what are chicks passing up the same type of dude for?